I am Dark and I am Light
by Valledorthedragon
Summary: Every has good and bad in them. With spirits the best or the worst of them can be brought out by whom they are claimed. Forces like the moon create good spirits- the shadows create dark ones. Then, the impossible happened. A young boy is resurrected and claimed by moon and shadow both. Now he is forever fighting the good and evil within him. That was how Jack lived.
1. Chapter 1

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Prologue- The Eclipse

 **Authors note: hey guys- sorry its been a while college has been getting crazy with the end of the year but now I've got time to post this! Yay! although... slight Hiccup in the usual update setup (I'll tell you more at the end) but I hope you enjoy it and please let me know what you think- I know you guys don't let me down- thanks for all the support in the past you guys are amazing^^**

The moon focussed its energy down on the earth.

There was a boy down there. One who had done a noble thing- one deserving of a second chance. He died to protect his sister, and such a heroic deed couldn't go unnoticed. So he was bringing him back. Giving him the opportunity to live again- just, not as alive as he had been before.

But there was something else about this boy. The moon had recognised a goodness in his character- light. Joy. A strong, caring heart. And it was for that reason also he was bringing the boy back. Perhaps he would even be one day worthy of the great title "Guardian". Yes, he could see the makings of a great Guardian in him, but he would have to wait.

He would need to grow, and he would need to learn much before he was ready for that title... And he would have to wait until he was needed, because that time was not yet. He could only pray the boy would be patient.

As he restored the boy to life, though- or the semblance of life he could give him- he was worried. The boy's spirit had to be rescued tonight, before it faded and travelled beyond his reach. But the timing was greatly unfortunate, for tonight was an eclipse. The shadow of the Earth slowly blocked his light, even as he resurrected the boy, and he could only hope he managed to do so completely before his time ran out and he was hidden from the world.

He was almost there. The boy had opened his eyes. Staring at him with the wide, innocent spheres he had changed to the colour of the winter sky. His hair had also been altered- to the colour of snow, and of moonbeams. All of it signs that he had claimed the boy as his own. He was one of his spirits- his winter child.

This way no other forces could try to take him as their own... and there are plenty that would try. There was potential in him, and a great power. He had died as a child. All that energy, and all that life he would have had still resided within him. He could be a powerful force for good... or for evil.

The moon was getting nervous. The Earth's shadow shutting away its light when he was so close. He needed more time. The boy was not yet claimed- he did not yet belong to him. He was still vulnerable!

He increased his efforts tried to speed the process, but all in vain. The Earth had finally eclipsed its light... But too soon. He wasn't done. He didn't think he'd done enough- he was too late.

The Man in the Moon could only wait, with terror, for the shadow to pass... to see what had become of the winter child.

 **Authors note: and so will you- sorry I'm going on holiday for the next week and I can't post whilst I'm there but it's been a while so I thought I'd give you guys something and at least I didn't leave you on too bad a cliffhanger right.. I hope so at least Anyways see you next week when I get back with the first official chapter^^**


	2. Chapter 2

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter One- Shadows and Moonbeams

 **Authors note: IM BACK! Oh my gosh it feels so good to be back here! I missed you guys soooo much and I can't apologise enough for only getting back to you all now but I just spent a whole week on holiday without Internet so yeah probably gonna spend most of tommorow on the web^^ hehe oh anyway back to the chapter! hope ypu all erm... well... Im bot quite sure what to say here because IMPORTANT WARNING READ THESE NEXT FEW WORDS- this isn't a very cheerful fanfic for the most part youll see what I mean if you choose to read on but it is pretty evil and dark in places but please don't hate me because of what happens- I will post cute oneshots and short stories alongside it ^^ that being said it does have lot of epic action in it so hopefully you will enjoy it^^ now that's out the way please read on^^ but please let me know what you think about it (I really do want to know badly with this one) but I will now be updating this daily so I will see you tommorow with the next update^^!**

 **Ps I apologise for this monster authors note^^**

The light of the moon had been eclipsed by darkness. The shadow of the Earth casting a blood red glow on the previously white moon. The power that supported the boy shut off. With sudden, terrifying lurch, he fell to the ice. Hitting it hard, it knocked him out.

So soon after his rebirth, he was vulnerable. Weaker in body and mind- more prone to both injury... and corruption- and the sudden fear he felt as he fell drew some unwanted attention.

The shadows slithered over to him. Drawing closer to the spirit. He was new, unclaimed, but most of all he was powerful. The darkness revelled in this discovery, and surrounded him. Seeping deep into his mind as the shadows took him as their own. He would be a powerful ally, they thought as they looked into him. All that he was, and could be. Him and the other shadow spirit, once known as Pitchiner, they'd be unstoppable. But what to name this little gem? They saw his old life that had been wiped from his memory, and saw that he had had been called Jackson Overland Frost. They liked the sound of the Jack part, but they were no fools. They knew that the moon's intended name for him would have been Frost, and so, they discarded it. Planting the boy's new given name of Jack Overland in his head- and spreading their influence deeper into him. So the moon wanted him to take on his appearance, did he? The darkness had a sick sense of humour. They saw that the moon was now a deep red, and so, since the moon was so insistant on having the boy resemble him, they changed the boy accordingly. His eyes, that the moon had made blue, turned a dark and deep red. The hair the colour of moonbeams turned a similar sickening shade. It was ironic really that the moon's little spirit should be reborn under a blood moon. When the moon turned the colour of darkness.

People lived under the mistaken impression that black was the colour of evil. They were wrong. Black was rich soil, which gave life, and night, which was restful. Red, though. That was the colour of evil. It was anger, and blood, and chaos, and danger. The true colour of darkness.

And then it was done.

As soon as they had appeared, the shadows were gone. Leaving the boy unconscious on the ice.

Before long, he came to, confused. What had happened? Why was he on the ice? He remembered the momentary flash of panic, and his eyes narrowed in anger. He'd fallen. Someone had dropped him... and he hated them for it. He jumped his feet in, and rose from a crouch, scowling round at the landscape. Where was he? What was he doing here? The frustration of not knowing raged through him, and he lashed out at the ground. He kicked something, and sent it spinning, with a rough grinding noise, across the ice. Tilting his head, he watched as it slowed in its revolving. Then, drawn to it, he reached out a foot to stop it. It changed in response to his touch.

What had originally appeared to be some kind of old crook, with a curved "C" at the end, now resembled something much more sinister. The straight end lengthened and sharpened to a lethal point. The curved end hardened, and honed its edges so that they were flat and sharp. The top transforming into a long, curved blade. A scythe.

Jack's eyes glinted maliciously, as he looked at it with renewed interest. He picked it up, and a blood red glow lit the weapon from within. He could feel the energy thrumming within it.

A rumbling crackling sound- like that of rolling thunder mixed with sparking lightning- caught his attention, and he looked down. Where the pointed end of the scythe touched the ice, dark energy, pulsating with red light, seeped into the ice, and small, black spikes, highlighted with crimson, grew from the surface of the ice itself. A dark smirk grew across his face as he saw it.

Then, he walked over to a nearby tree, eager to see what this new found power could do- ready to unleash the fury of the darkness on it. He raised the curved blade of the scythe, and went to swing it at the tree-.

Frost! The alarmed, urgent voice cried out in his mind.

Your name... is Jack Frost.

Frost? He blinked, confused. His name was Overland, not Frost... Right?

Unexpectedly, a patch of white appeared amongst the dark red of his hair. As a shaft of moonlight fell upon him, the white spread. The red of the blood moon receeding to reveal the white of the natural moon mirrored the red giving way to soft white on the spirit's head. He didn't know it, but the light in him was reawakening. Sacrificing yourself for your sister... that kind of act takes a whole lot of goodness in your heart. And whilst that goodness might have been locked away by the darkness forever, if left untouched, the brief moment, in which the moon had tried to claim him- and now reawakened that claim in him- brought it back.

He looked round at the white wonderland around him, and his gaze softened. He smiled- happily this time. Not even noticing the scythe in his hand slowly shifting into the shape of the hooked staff it had been before. His eyes (now a bright blue) sparkled with wonder at the beauty of the snow. A soft, light crackling made him gasp. He'd lowered his staff, as he gazed in amazement at the lake, and the curved end just skimmed the surface of the nearby tree. White, tiny frost crystals spread around trunk of the tree. Curling and entwining into a beautiful pattern as it did so.

He reached out to touch it- admiring the slight glinting, as the moonlight lit the crystals. Then, he frowned- looking back to the frozen lake. The dark patch, with sharp, pointed spikes protruding from it, was still there. An eerie red glow coming from the black ice. He'd done that, hadn't he... So, then... how had he also done that? He thought, confused, looking at the white crystals that were nothing like the dark ice on the lake.

He shook his head- smiling his confusion away. It didn't matter.

He strode away, happily. Had he seem his reflection, he would have noticed the small patch of dark red hair at the corner of his skull. The darkness swas still there. Whispering maliciously at the edge of his mind. Urging him lash out and destroy. A dark corner of his mind that steadily burned with anger- but he ignored it. Barely even registering its existence- and with a magical ice staff to use, he easily forgot about it. But, though ignored... the darkness was still there.

He made his way around the edge of the clearing with big, gleeful steps. Swinging his staff, and tapping and freezing things at random as he went along. Excitement building, a sudden wild urge overcame him, as he watched the frost, and he ran- sprinting into the forest, with the staff trailing beside him. Waves of beautiful glittering white covered the entire range of plant life in the forest. Every shrub and tree.

With a sudden strong motion, he whipped the staff ahead of him, and was tossed up into the air. A gust of wind pushing him higher and higher above the trees.

Wow! He thought, as he rolled over and the world spun with him. He managed to catch himself atop the gust, and stayed there for a while- smiling with achievement- until, abruptly, it stopped. The panic of falling consuming him as he dropped. He hit a branch, and clung on fearfully.

Attempting to steady himself with a deep breath. The red on his head spread a little as slight annoyance came over him, but the elation of flight was still with him. It made his glare up at the wind was playful, rather than aggressive. The base of his skull was now all dark, but he couldn't see it- nor did he notice his anger growing. He looked across from where he was perched, and saw a village.

Somehow, despite a rather turbulent, embarrassing flight, he made it. Landing on his feet, and then immediately tripping over his cloak. He got up as though it never happened, and rolled his eyes at the sky. The wind really liked messing with him, huh? He wandered up to the villagers, wondering why they weren't the least bit surprised by the kid that, literally, just breezed in.  
"Hello!" He called out to one of them. They carried on walking. Now he finally noticed anger that had been with him the whole time, as it grew. Why were they ignoring him?

He tried to push it back, but his smile was slightly more forced than before.  
"Hello?" He called out again, and, just like last time, was ignored. His smile dropped now- not even forced anymore. The red in his hair had grown alarmingly- almost equalling the amount of white, and splitting his head in two. He tried again, forcing himself not to lose his temper.  
"Good evening, ma'am." He began. She didn't respond.

The end of his staff was slowly growing into a long, pointed blade, as his eyes darkened in every sense of the word, as they turned a dark crimson. The red had now overtaken the white.  
"Ma'am." He repeated, not even trying to hold back the threat in his voice. He wanted answers! He didn't care how he got them. Why wasn't she answering?!

He heard the sound of laughter, and his gaze softened as he saw a child chasing a dog happily. The red and white balanced out as he went to move infront of him.  
"Excuse me." He said, politely. "Could you tell me where I-." He didn't finish, due to the sheer horror that incapacitated him.

The kid had walked straight through him. Like he didn't even exist.

Panic and confusion racing through his mind, turning it over into chaos. What was going on? What was happening?! What was wrong?! What was he?! He- he didn't even know his name! Was he Overland or Frost? Was he good or bad? Light or dark? Moonlight or shadow? What was he?! Where did he belong?!

Pure, mindless confusion and terror flooded his mind. The shadows urging him to violence- to shoot out at the villagers, force them to acknowledge him, make them suffer for ignoring him, and get some release his stress in a whirlwind of dark energy! The light urged him not to- told him it wasn't their fault- he shouldn't hurt them, it wasn't right. But, he could barely listen either side of his head, so shocked by the discovery as he was. He didn't even see that the staff had morphed into a combination of the two it could become. Constantly shifting towards and away from each one- a sharp crook, a blunt scythe, both all at once- as the light and the shadow battled for control over his mind.

He didn't know what to do! He couldn't even think in the midst of the raging battlefield of his mind. Light fought shadow tearing apart his mind as it did so. The pain was unbearable, splitting his brain in two. It was pure unbridled chaos, and there was no one to save him. No one to help rescue him from the depths of his mind.

He kept pleading- wishing desperately for someone to come. Shamelessly calling for help... But no one came.

Huge, gales of wind swept round the village in sympathy with chaos ruled mind- and the people only ran from the square towards their houses where they'd be safe, unaware he even existed. He was alone.

The slow realisation sunk in. Clouding his mind with grief, as the fight raged on... Alone... Some part of him, that was soon swept off by the whirlwind of thoughts, screamed out: what was wrong with him?! What was happening?! Why was he hurting so bad?! What was he?!

The truth was that he was both good and bad. He didn't know it yet, but he would come to the realisation that he was a part of the shadows and the moon both. Each had equal hold of him. He was light and dark- both saint and demon all at once... and at that very moment, it was tearing his mind in two.


	3. Chapter 3

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Two- Balance

 **Authors note: hey ^^ so if you're still here I guess I didn't scare you off I might have overreacted a little I dunno but better safe than sorry right^^ this type of story is not everyone's cup of tea but I hope you enjoy it please review- with this story especially I'm a little nervous so I would appreciate knowing what you think :-) anyway that's all for now Ill see you tommorow with the next update and until then I shall leave you with this chapter**

He perched atop a statue. At peace... or as at peace as he could be with the two dual natures inside him. They forever made him restless, so he rarely stayed in the same place for long. But, for whatever reason, he kept coming back here. Burgess. The village that had been the first he visited... and the first to ignore him. Not that it was the only one- every one did. He wasn't upset about it, though. He couldn't be. Sadness led to a slip of concentration, and from that balance was lost. He caged up his emotions- feelings were bad, they destroyed him.

He'd learnt to make himself neutral. Neither good or bad- or sometimes both good and bad. That was the only time he could make a difference in the world- when he did things that were evil and good at the same time. Like he was.

Some of the easiest ways to do that were pranks. They were a great relief to his blocked powers and numb mind. They didn't make him lose harmony. Freezing a kids tongue to a fountain was bad- making the kids around him laugh was good. Making someone slip and fall was bad- creating a pile of snow to break the fall was good. It was a blessing, this thing called trouble. It was a bad thing to do, but still made people happy. It was probably the only thing that kept him sane.

Of course, he couldn't do that forever. He had to either have fun with the world, causing happy havoc, or else be indifferent to it. Neutral. He could only either be everything or nothing- he couldn't be one thing. He couldn't favour one side- couldn't allow a single slip on the thin line he trod between good and evil. If he did...

He blocked out the thoughts. Forgot that he'd just remembered something. He hadn't thought about that little girl. Not remembered how one day he'd saved someone from a car accident- making them slip and fall forwards out of the path of the speeding vehicle. No, he'd not thought about how he'd let his good side choose what to do. Let himself do a kind act... A terrible choice. Later that same day, the darkness took over and he did something bad. He caused a car accident- making the car slip so that it slammed, with crushing force, into a lamppost. When he finally balanced out again, he learnt that there'd been a little girl in that car. Gravely injured by the accident. She'd turned out okay in the end... but she'd spent three months in a coma because of it.

Just because he tried to do something nice. If by saving someone's life you caused another to die... you just wouldn't do it. You'd let things take their course. Never do anything good, so you could never do anything bad. Such was the life he led.

It was somewhat like having two kids forever fighting inside your head- whenever one got something, the other did too. If he let the good side take over, the dark one soon followed. That was why he had to keep balance remain indifferent- or satisfy both sides at once- he couldn't let himself favour one.

But, in truth, he was about as stable as a coin rolling on its side. He'd start off okay, but then he'd start wavering- leaning side to side- then, eventually, he'd land on one... and then he'd just have to deal with the consequences. However painful it might be. Because that pain wasn't as bad as when he tried to hold things back. If he fought to keep himself in balance while one side was taking over, or remain one sided when balance was trying to resume... It was terrible. It gave him a, literally, splitting headache. The feeling was that his skull, his brain, his very essence, was being shredded in two. It was pure agony, but even then that wasn't the worst of it.

The worst things... were the breakdowns.

When any form of control and harmony would leave as, without warning, the moon and the shadow would battle across his mind- just as they did on the first night of his life. Those were the worst times in his life. The very worst. The times where he'd pitifully curl into a ball, whimpering and whining, wishing for it to end. Comforting himself and crying, because there was no one else to comfort him- and the loneliness would crush him, as his mind tore itself apart. Pure, soul ripping agony. Pain such as others couldn't imagine if their skull was being cut in half... And he knew it was only inevitable. They struck without warning, and he could only wait them out. Endure them, and then carry on and try to piece himself back together until the next one destroyed him.

He was better at dealing with things now. He could keep the peace much better. It had been a full year since the last breakdown (a new record). He'd slowly built himself up. each time gaining or losing precious moments between each one... and slowly... the seconds between breakdowns grew into minutes... into hours... into days and now after three hundred years (after 10500 days), he'd been incredibly lucky and careful enough to manage a year. He tried not to think about how bad he'd been in the beginning when he'd had only mere seconds of blissful godsend peace before he'd be sent into the next pit of pain and hell. He'd had to teach himself how to avoid them or at least delay them. Alone. Spotting the triggers, learning to compromise, blocking emotions and thoughts- all things he'd had to learn that sometimes worked. But that didn't make it easy- it was anything but.

Movement on the ground drew his attention, and he leaned out from the statue. The sunlight getting reflected softly by his snow white hair, and getting swallowed by the dark red side of it. The equal split of red and white showing he was at peace. He tilted his head, as a bunch of kids walked past. All dressed in thick clothing to stay warm in the snow that covered the area, curtesy of him. Jamie, Pippa, Claude, Caleb, Monty. He recited in his head, naming each one. They were at that point in a snow day where they'd just met, and were trying to decide what to do.

Both the darkness and light were in agreement. One word pulsating in his mind. Snowball.. Snowball.. Snowball.. He smirked, and brought his hand up, cupping it slightly. A slight tingle of energy in his fingers, and a lump of snow appeared there. Growing into a perfectly round sphere that fit in his hand exactly. He narrowed his eyes as he selected his target: Jamie, he decided. The kid's family had been in this town even longer than he had, and he had a knack for believing in the extraordinary. That drew his attention to him- which was both a good and a bad thing (with him, it never anything but).

He threw the ball. It arced seamlessly through the air, smacking him at the back of the neck. He grinned- success! He jumped down from the statue- snowball fights were no fun unless you got right stuck in yourself. He saw Jamie throw one, but didn't see the kid it hit- he was too busy targeting his own: Monty. Wham! He face planted in the snow. Now he'd come straight through the centre of group, he turned to to skirt the edge, giving him an easy view of all of them. Time to really get this fight going.

He loved snowball fights- they were brilliant fun, and perfect for him. It let him stretch out his powers, without any danger. It was filled with innocent violence, joyful pain, good cold. It seemed his life was full of contradictions- if only because he was one himself- but it wasn't long before something else caught his attention.

He spotted Jamie running, but interesting part was that he was holding a sled in front of him, using it to deflect the flying snow. A glint appeared in his eyes. The kid aught to be careful, he thought. With weather such as this it was very easy to slip...

"Whoa!" He heard the kid's alarmed yell, and his friends shout after him.  
"Jamie!" After that, he was shooting along with the runaway sled. The dark leading the kid towards pedestrians and into the road, the light dodging him out of the way at the last minute. Needless to say Jamie was terrified, and loving every second. Laughing as avoided yet another near death call. Jack's laugh soon followed it- malevolent and innocent. He sent him shooting up a ramp, and the sled went careening into the air with the kid still attached. At the last possible moment, he cushioned the fall with a thick blanket of snow.

Not even bothering to look back and check on the kid, he jumped ahead. Whooping as he leapt into the wind that carried him high into the air, into the rollercoaster of the unbroken, wild air currents of the open sky. He could've used the chaos energy- it let him fly in a sense. It could surround him like a shell and work a little like electricity, using attraction to pull him in whichever direction he pleased. Like he was travelling in partly visible ball lightning. But it didn't feel the same as the wind blowing him about. He allowed himself to get tossed from gust to gale to eddie, as the sun set in front of him. He liked sunsets- the day and the night covered the sky in equal measure. It was a lot like himself, really. The light and the dark forever flitting across the sky.

He was Jack. Simply Jack. It was confusing to think of his name as any more than that. He didn't know if he was Overland or Frost, but that seemed to be the one thing he was in agreement on- he was Jack. He was still desperate to know which he truly was- whether he belonged to the moon or to the shadows- but he didn't dare let himself wonder.

The balance he kept was a delicate one- easily thrown by a careless thought, or feeling. And so, he just called himself Jack. Both evil and good. And he continued to tred that dangerous road, for that was all he could ever do.

Doomed to forever battle with himself. Never resting. Never settling. Always torn.

That was the life he led.


	4. Chapter 4

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Three- Change

 **Authors note: hey guys back with more and this is where things stay to get interesting I hope you enjoy it ^^ please leave a review and I will see you tommorow (oh and this series actually had a theme song! well two actually cos I couldn't decide which hehe but I think they really help you get into the story and they match spookily well. okay so there's "monster" by skillet and "animal I have become" by three days grace) that's all for now though see you all tommorow^^**

He wandered along the pylon wire, restlessness and impatience taking over. He'd eventually decided to come back to Burgess, as it was about to enter D-S, but it couldn't come soon enough. The split natures in him didn't ever settle. He probably hadn't even been waiting thirty seconds, but he was the worst at waiting, because, whenever he was doing nothing, both sides would argue.

The impatient shadows were screaming at him to go and do something more interesting, like freeze a continent- the moon side was willing him to stay put for the show. It was almost impossible to stay in any place for more than a few seconds, but he was trying- even though the disagreement was dangerously close to shattering the truce he'd fought so hard to keep.

He'd long since covered the entire area in frost and black ice to entertain himself. A nerve next to his eye twitched. What was taking so-? He stopped. Finally- there it was. Burgess had at long last entered the dreamshift (or D-S, as some shortened it to).

He grinned at the sight of the flowing sand, settling back into balance, as he was in agreement: _play_. He didn't waste a second. He sprang off the wire with a dull twang, and reached for the nearest tendril of floating gold. _What would it be? What would it be?_ It didn't take long to find out. A golden animal appeared in the stream, leaping past him. A wolf. He grinned- he loved wolves, and not for the obvious reason that they lived in snow. But because they were also two people- the family and the hunters.

 _What else?_ He thought, attention flitting to another nearby branch of sand. A touch later another animal trotted around. Haha, very funny. He swore this sand was laughing at him sometimes. He had somewhat of an ongoing joke with it (or perhaps it was with the man behind it). It was always joking with him, and this had to be one of the best yet. A zebra. A golden zebra, mind, but there were still stripes patterning its coat. He chuckled slightly- the stripes in its mane mimicked the split colour of his own head (though his was just two block colours and not rows of stripes). What else would he could up with tonight? He remembered once it came up with a sea lion- which had baffled him until it balanced a golden ball on its nose (the punch line being that it was a balancing act like him).

He loved the sand. It was neutral territory. It didn't cause him to do anything good or bad, it just made him happy... and it was the only thing in the world that would do so- aside from himself.

Perhaps it was pretty terrible that a bunch of sand was the only thing in existence that tried to cheer him up, but no one liked a dark spirit (even a half dark one), and he was just glad it existed.

All too soon, after a wide spread of golden animals, including a cat (definately a split tempered animal) and a puffer fish (an explosion waiting to happen), the sand faded. He enjoyed the sensation... He was content... Both sides balanced...

It didn't even last a full second. He was soon getting the urge to go freeze a motorway- and soon after, give a remote town a snow day. He stopped himself before an argument could even begin. He definately wanted a release after the dreadful wait for the sand. _Power!_ The dark demanded. _Snow._ The light thought. _Storms! Wind. Speed! Race? Yes._

He'd learnt to settle both sides of himself, thankfully. There was a huge risk of instability whenever he was in conflict. Most of the time he was fine doing whatever neutral or contradictory thing he was doing, but when it came to making decisions... they were dangerous... but inevitable. He'd managed it this time, though.

He leapt into the wind- a bunch of fighter jets were probably flying about somewhe- what was that?

He froze, as he spotted something speed past in the shadows. His eyes narrowed... _What?_... Mutual interest led him to search for the shape... _There!_ He zipped after it, curiosity unified his intent to see what it was. He stopped in a tree near where it had vanished, blue and red eyes scanning the area for it... It flew past his side. _After it!_ It didn't take much to realise this thing wanted him to follow, and caution flared within him, although he wasn't scared. Just let that thing try and make a move on him- he could freeze it solid before it even had time to think maybe this was a bad idea.

He reached an alley, and paced round it. He held the pointed staff in front of him. _Where was it?.. Where was it?.. Where-?_  
"G'day mate." _There! Get him!- Wait!_ He just barely stopped himself from freezing the whole alleyway solid. He'd never be able to find out who it was if he did that. "Been a long time." The voice continued. Now where was that accent familiar... He thought. He knew who this was. A smirk spread across his face- brilliant. "Blizzard of '68 I believe." He recalled.

He tried not to wince at the mention of the infamous snowstorm. That had been one of the worst times he lost control.

It was a debate about Easter itself that did it. _Should he freeze the eggs? Maybe take them before the kids got there? But that's not fair- it'll make the kids unhappy, and it might had bad repercussions on Bunny. So what? It'll be fun. Besides, anything against the old badger so much the better. But it will make the kids sad. I don't care! You should!_ Then the war had commenced. Destroying his sanity, control and peace.

On its own, it wouldn't have been so bad, but he'd been holding his staff at the time. Normally, he tries to drop it if he feels an argument coming, or go somewhere out the way to stop any possible damage. But this time the chaos that raged inside his head raged beyond it, and then, well... the blizzard of '68 happened.

He tried not to think about it- he risked restarting the battle even all these years later.  
"Easter Sunday, wasn't it?" The giant rabbit finished, finally coming out of the shadows- as if he didn't already know who it was. He was tempted to throw a wave of ice at him, but then (his good side pointed out), his face of anger and annoyance was so much more entertaining than that of unconsciousness. The dark agreed.

"Bunny!" He grinned. "Still mad about that, Peter Rabbit?" He smirked, getting his voice down to a perfect needling taunt.  
"Yes." Bunny growled. There's that little angry face- his little bunny nose flares up, and his eyes go all glare-y. He struggled not to laugh in amusement. He was just so brilliant to annoy. He whipped a boomerang up to throwing height. Oh, wow. Going to hit him with that little stick, is he? Aww, as adorable at it would be, he knew the oversized cuddly toy wouldn't actually do it, and he wasn't the least bit surprising when he lowered it.  
"But, this is about something else." He said, examining the edge of the boomerang casually. Oh really? He tried to think- what else could it be?

Was it the flowers he froze five years ago? The eggs he took three years before that? The time when he froze his feet to the floor, maybe? Or perhaps it was this year's promising to be snowy Easter that had his whiskers in a twist.

"Fellas." He said, and Jack fought the urge to snigger. What, was he going to call the egg army on him? This aught to be good. _Whoa! What the?!_ He was yanked off his feet, as a yeti held him up by his hood.

Sudden anger flared within him. The white side of his hair turning a dark blood red as the end of his staff grew into a scythe. He sliced at one of the yetis, almost taking off its arm. Its cry of fear was most satisfactory, but it wasn't put off. Before he could aim a further blow, they threw the dangerous spirit into a sack and through the portal as quick as they could.

They couldn't help but ask for a ride back with Bunny. They thought of the burning, blood filled eyes and sharp, deadly scythe... They definitely didn't want to be behind that thing when he reorientated himself. They could only dread to think what would happen when the dark spirit gathered his senses. They doubted there'd be anything left of the pole if their master and his fellow Guardians couldn't subdue him. But orders were orders, however much they wished they could disobey them.

Perhaps, the pole was being destroyed even, as they returned.


	5. Chapter 5

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Four- The Guardians

 **Authors note: and so he finally meets the guardians... Not the best first impression. Anyways I hope you enjoy it let me know what you think and I will post the next chapter tommorow as always^^ see you then**

The Guardians were all waiting, eagerly, for the one who was to be their latest companion to emerge the sack. It hit the ground and was still for a second... Then it happened.

The fabric was torn open- shredded in half, as a scythe whipped round. The top flew off with the wickedly quick motion and the bottom half fell, revealing the spirit within.

He was poised in a dangerous, predatorial crouch. One leg, around which he had pivoted, stretched out, pressing into the floor. The scythe held in his opposite hand, raised and deadly. Such a fury blazed in his glowing, blood red eyes it took a great deal of self control to ignore the instinct to run. The crimson of his fury driven eyes matched that of his hair, which was tugged erratically by the static that stormed about the room. The very air around him buzzed and thrummed with dark energy- tiny bursts of lightning like, red chaos energy flickering around him. Black ice lit with a demonic, red inner glow grew from the ground around its master.

He looked like something that'd come straight out of hell itself- and, to put it mildly, the Guardians were nervous. This was the one they were supposed to call friend? Who was going to help them? Who could bring joy and happiness to the children of the world? This vision of darkness before them?!

The dark demon glared at each one of them. **_Which one? Which one had done it?! Who's idea was it?! It didn't matter. They were all going to be sorry for it. The ones responsible for his capture most of all._**

 ** _The fairy woman at the side. She looked worried- even a flicker of fear detectable from the depths of her pretty, little eyes. She should be afraid. He was going to make her suffer most painfully for conspiring with those who brought him here._**

 **The fat man with the stupid beard... Him. He was the one who commanded the yetis! His fault! He was going down! He was going to feel pain. The true power of darkness- he was going to know it well by the end of today. He tightened his grip around his scythe. Him first. He was itching to see his scythe turn red. Red like the chaos- like the burning energy that raged within him! He couldn't wait to slice the blade deep into- wait... That little man... The golden one** with the concerned expression. The beginnings of whips forming in his hands... made from sand...

 _It was the Sandman... The person who was responsible for the only thing that worked to make him happy. He... he made him smile, he... made him feel... good._

The anger slowly melted away, as the blade of the scythe softened into a wooden, curved staff- the end still pointed. The blood red of his hair receded to balance out with white. One of his eyes turned a bright, soft blue. He relaxed his stance, and drew himself up to a standing position. Wary and annoyed, but no longer furious.  
"Why am I here?" He asked, curiously. The red dwindling until it vanished, and he was left with only white hair and blue eyes.

The Guardians blinked, not sure how to respond. What had just happened? What had caused him to just calm down like that? And what had happened just then? All that energy flying around- that was dark energy. How was he supposed to help them? They were supposed to be fighting darkness, not allying themselves with it! Was this a joke? A trap? What was this kid? He seemed to almost be two seperate things.

The way the white and red moved across his his hair... that was not natural. Nothing was supposed to be able to do that. Shape shifting was different- regular spirits couldn't change their form. They were what they were... so what did that make this... they weren't even sure what to call him. They didn't understand him- and they definitely didn't trust him. How were they supposed to work with someone like that? What in the world was Manny thinking?!

Only one of them trusted their friend's judgement enough to continue trying to ally the spirit.  
"So you are Jack, then?" He inquired, politely. Attempting to break the tense awkward silence. The boy nodded.  
"Yeah." He confirmed- still confused and not unsuspicious of the older spirits- leaving North wondering what to do next... Introductions! Where had his manners gone? He should introduce himself, and his fellow Guardians.  
"Well, I am North." He began. "I, erm-." He was spared from having to think of something to say next by tooth, who unexpectedly zipped up to him. Shocking them all- including the split spirit. She gasped.  
"Oh, they look even more perfect than I thought!" She exclaimed, peering at his mouth, which had opened slightly in shock at her approach. "Show me again, show me again! I think they even sparkled!" She chattered, excitably. As though that was some kind of magic word, a dozen or so miniature versions of herself appeared- eager to see if the claim was true.

Their sudden appearance overwhelmed the younger spirit, and he stumbled back. He had no idea what to make of this. What was happening? What was she doing? She wasn't afraid? Or disgusted with him?! No one had ever dared even get this close to him- he'd never been this near to anyone. He was completely thrown off. He had no idea what to do, and he didn't like it. The confusion flashed his mind back to the many breakdowns he'd endured, and if it weren't for the fact that the darkness wasn't back yet he was pretty sure he would've been sent spiralling into another. Still, he hated the confusion- and the terror it put him in mind of. The horrifying memory quickened his pulse and breath.

"Tooth!" North called out. She whipped round to face him, along with her other fairies. "Don't you think you should give him a little space." He hinted, raising an eyebrow.  
"Oh, right. Sorry." She apologised to Jack, who visibly blew out a relieved breath as she backed away. This wasn't a breakdown- he was just overreacting. He relaxed a little.

As Tooth backed off, North gave her a cautionary look- reminding her that they didn't know how to deal with the boy yet.  
"Yes, well, that was the Tooth Fairy." North addressed Jack again. She grinned apologetically at him, and he felt a slight smile tug at his lips. Tooth blinked in mild shock and confusion as she saw it- was this really the same demon from earlier? "And this the Sandman." North finished, noting how the boy's eyes softened a little as he gestured the smallest Guardian... and why were they blue now?

Sandy waved at the younger spirit happily. He was glad he didn't need to use his whips earlier. He knew the boy from when he played with his dreamsand and, whilst he hadn't seen that dark side of him before, he was relieved he didn't need to restrain or injure him to stop him attacking his fellow Guardians.

Jack nodded in response- possibly in slight respect to the dream master?  
"You still haven't answered my-." He began to point out, neutrally, when another voice entered the globe room, and he felt a sudden tension form in his muscles.  
"I don't see why I can't just come straight in here, North." The complaining voice said. He knew full well it was because of the protective spells and magic surrounding the place, he just moaned anyway. North noticed a sudden darkness appear at the back of the boy's eyes- only metaphorical speaking, not literally- but, still, he didn't like it.

As Bunny entered the room there was the tense feeling of introducing two animals together, waiting for one of them to pounce on the other.  
"And I take it you already know Bunny?" He said, awkwardly. Jack's smile turned forced as the newest arrival entered, but it was more of a grimace- there was nothing warm in it.  
"You could say that." He said, the hints of a harsh, gritted teeth tone in his voice. Bunny scowled back, oblivious to the anger, and ignorant of the demon he'd almost unleashed on the pole. The demon was gone for the time being, but it would return- and soon.

Trying to distract himself from the anger he felt towards the oversized rabbit, he turned back to the unofficial leader of the group.  
"So, why am I here?" He repeated.  
"Ah, yes. Well-." North began. The soft tinkling of sand interupted him, as Sandy raised a hand like he was in a classroom. He then proceeded to make a bunch of symbols above his head: snowflake, head, moon, G- he shook his head- man, moon, snow-g- he lost track. He had absolutely no idea what he was trying to say, but he welcomed the calm the Sandman installed in him- and he couldn't help but smile at the failed attempt. He'd tried at least.  
"Er, sorry, that's not really helping." He said.

North's ears pricked at the word "sorry". An agent of darkness wouldn't apologise- especially for something so trivial... and there was that softness in his eyes... That kind of softness would never be seen from Pitch- which reminded him of the spirit's whole reason being here.  
"You are here, Jack." North finally explained. "Because we need your help." He explained.

His expression was immediately wiped of all emotion, and he quickly turned away so that they couldn't see his face. He deliberately hid it from them. He didn't want them to see that he did want to help. If they saw that, they'd persist, and he simply couldn't help- no matter what he wished. He remembered that little girl- three months of her life spent in a coma, and all because he true to do something good. Suddenly, he wished the darkness was back- it would be easy to refuse their offer then- but, no, the darkness had receded after its recent outburst, allowing his good side to temporarily shine through. But it wouldn't stay that way for long- he'd soon be battling for balance once again. As much as he hated it- the constant compromising and placating, and never getting a moments peace. Then he scorned himself- it was his life, things weren't going to change. He just had to deal with it.

He hardened himself.  
"No." He couldn't help them... and besides, even if he wanted to, why should he? What have they ever done for him? A tiny patch of red had begun to reappear amongst the white of his hair.

"See? What did I tell you?!" Bunny exclaimed. The red grew suddenly as the split spirit froze on the spot, still facing away from them.  
"Jack, I don't think you underst-." Tooth attempted to explain further, moving closer to him.  
"I don't need to." He stopped her. Shunning her attempt, and stopping her getting any closer. Circumstances didn't matter. If he helped them, he destroyed them- it was as simple as that.  
"That's exactly what I was telling you guys! He doesn't even care!" Jack ground his teeth- the red had grown so quick it had now taken over its respective half again, and was already stretching to claim part of the other. Keep it under control, he thought to himself. "He doesn't want to help."

Jack's eyes burned into the floor. He. Knew. **Nothing.** "Didn't _**care"?!** " **Didn't want to"?**_! He couldn't- **_no want about it!_** What he **_wanted_** never **_mattered_** in _**anything**_! He wanted to _**kick his head in right now**_ but he wasn't... Although it was **_getting a lot more tempting with every passing second._**

He rounded back at him, snarling slightly.  
"You don't know anything." He growled. Bunny should've been shaking by now, but instead he walked straight up to him in the face of his anger.  
"Don't I? You're a danger. You're out of control. You won't ever help us, or anyone, and because of that you'll always be alone. You won't ever belong. You just destroy everything you touch. No one will ever believe in you. All you'll ever be able to do is continue with your sad, lonely, little life." He told him, glaring down at him. He hated the kid for what he did on that day. The blizzard on Easter Sunday. People killed on his precious holiday, and all because of him.

Jack had reached his boiling point. His scythe held ready in his hand. The darkness set to explode on the Easter rabbit- see how lucky his feet were for him when they were hanging from the wall! **_The filthy! Disgusting-!_**  
"Jack." He heard the whisper, and would've paid it no mind if not for the slight tinkling that accompanied it.

He looked to the side and saw Sandy, looking worried, gesture to North.  
"Walk with me." The Guardian requested. Jack saw the look of concern and reassurance in the Sandman's eyes and his anger abated. Maybe the rabbit's feet were good luck because he was really lucky he wasn't dead meat right now. He turned and walked towards the older man- following him deeper into he workshop.

When they were gone, Tooth finally rounded on the taller Guardian.  
"What did you think you were you doing?!" She screamed. "How could you say all that to him?!" Sandy also glared at him- arms crossed in defense of the younger spirit, he scowled at disapprovingly his friend.  
"Oh, like you think any different. You're only admiring him for his dental work!" He yelled.  
"No! That's not true!" She said, outraged he would even think that of her. "He was different before you came in- he was nicer, and his hair was white. His eyes were blue."  
"Big deal, he has colour change hair." Bunny scoffed.  
"Something's wrong with him, Bunny." She told him. "Something that probably has to do with Pitch." She thought.

Bunny rolled his eyes, and looked away.  
"He needs out help. I think that's why Manny sent him to us." She muttered. Bunny ignored this, annoyed by the fact that- on top of Pitch- Manny thrust this little problem on their hands. But Tooth didn't care, and neither did Sandy. They stared off down the corridor he had left through, wondering what was wrong with the young spirit.


	6. Chapter 6

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Five- Centres

 **Authors note: so here we are with the next chapter nothing massive happens really but I hope you enjoy it ^^ please leave a review and I shall be back tommorow with more^^**

 **ooh and to the guest who reviewed thank you^^ I'm glad you're enjoying it and don't worry I will keep updating^^ thanks for reviewing**

North wasn't sure what to make of the younger spirit. He'd seemed ready to chop Bunny's head off one second- then, the next, he'd agreed to a tour round the workshop. If he was truly a spirit of the darkness he wouldn't have relented like that, and if he was one of their own- saved by the moon- he wouldn't have got that aggressive to begin with. He was a puzzle, and one he wanted to solve.

Now that the spirit was away from the Easter Guardian, he seemed a lot calmer. He must really get to him, he thought. They reached the main part of the workshop, it was the same as always. The yetis all working hard to make the toys as perfect as possible, testing them out, avoiding each others work, coming up to him with random business things for him to approve of. He felt that same feeling he always did when he got here: belonging. Here was where he was meant to be. His workshop. The heart of all operations here, and quite a spectacle to behold- even to his eyes who'd seen it uncountable times before.

He looked over to see the winter spirit gazing round. North's eyes widened in sudden interest. The boy's eyes were full of wonder, or- no, wait- one of them was. The blue one was positively sparkling with amazement, the red was just plain dark- it was impossible to see any reaction to the workshop in it. He noted this, mentally. More pieces to the puzzle, ever growing in complexity. He was going to figure him out. Manny had a reason for sending him here.

When he'd shown the boy with the moonlight, he made him up of the light itself- his previous image of Pitch had been constructed from shadow. A clear sign he was supposed to be an ally... and yet it seems he would've quite happily destroyed the pole, if not for Sandy.

North frowned slightly as he remembered that blood red, savage gaze he'd fixed him with. It had quite clearly ruled him out as his target... and there had been a very dark intent in his eyes. He dreaded to think what he'd done if he hadn't calmed himself at the last minute. Compare then to now, when he was admiring the toy factory, and it was clear something was amiss. Those two faces couldn't belong to the same person. Someone so savage and consumed by darkness would never feel something so innocent as wonder... So what was he?

Well, he'd figure it out eventually. Enough trying to figure him out, for now. Manny had shown them him for a reason, and he trusted his old friend's judgement without hesitation. He just had to show him why he should fight for them. Surely, he'd change his mind.

Jack stared round at the huge, open space. This place was massive! He'd held back at first, unsure if he was allowed to admire the place or whether it'd spark another argument, but it seemed simply looking around was in neutral territory.

A vague memory teased at the edge of his mind.  
"I think I tried to break in here once." He muttered, not realising her spoken outloud and he was extremely surprised to hear someone respond. No one ever answers him- and definately like that. Not like he was an equal. Like he wasn't the monster he was, deserving of harsh words and viscous tones.  
"Think?" North asked. He couldn't hide his brief astonishment at his easy going tone. He struggled to believe it was directed at him.  
"...Yeah. It's a bit of a black spot." He explained, trying not to think about it.  
"You mean blank spot." North corrected, good naturedly.  
"No..." He murmured, barely a whisper. "I meant black."

Sometimes when the dark took over he didn't know what he was doing (or had done). He didn't have the faintest idea why this sometimes happened, but he was relieved by it. He didn't want to know what he'd done under the thrall of darkness. Not that it mattered to him in the slightest.

"Phil! I don't like it- paint it red!" He yelled out to a yeti delicately painting a good fifty robots blue. Of course he was putting the finishing touches on the last one before getting told to start again. His face of frustration was just brilliant. **_Go on. Have some fun._** He felt the urge from both balanced sides, and a smirk crept up to his eyes. With a subtle tap, a patch of tiny crystals of black ice spread across the floor. They travelled up onto the counter and up the back of the robot. Meanwhile, Phil had finished having his little temper tantrum and was turning his attention back to the robot, paintbrush at the ready. He wasn't expecting to see it glaring back at him with glowing, red black ice eyes.

He garbled in alarm- jumping back and flailed about- before falling off his chair. Jack laughed- yes! That was awesome! Uh oh- lost track of the big guy. That was not good, seeing as he was practically a soldier in an enemy camp.

He knew few would dare challenge him- nobody picks a fight with the shadows unless they have a death wish- but he knew they hated him. Everyone did. He was everyone's enemy, and he wasn't surprised. He'd done some terrible things. Not that he could help it- and not that he cared.

Thankfully, the big, red coat was hard to miss and he easily caught up with him- perhaps leaving a little patch of invisible, clear ice on the floor behind him. As he approached, North was just pushing open a door that led to a much smaller room, but it was somehow more magical. Dozens of almost finished ice sculptures filled it, and he couldn't help but stare. He knew a thing or two about ice and to have made those models without shaping it like he would... well, it was pretty impressive.

He slid his gaze across the entire room, until it rested on the occupant. He was looking at him strangely. It wasn't with disgust, or hate, or anger, as he was accustomed to. It was... interest?  
"Why are you looking at me like that?" He asked, hiding the slight nervousness he felt- nerves led to fear, led to lashing out. He had to be numb, he reminded himself. Caging up him emotions.  
"I find you to be quite the puzzle." He answered, simply. "You seem to be enjoying my workshop and, yet, you were going to destroy it earlier." He pondered, stroking his chin thoughtfully. The way he just, oh so casually, threw that in there surprised him. Oh, you just almost destroyed my entire life's work- no biggie.

He didn't quite know what to say, but... he was getting to quite enjoy this feeling of getting talked to without getting hurt or scorned by the words. Don't get used to it, he berated himself. Its not like this will ever be more than a one off thing.

"I wonder... what is your centre?" He speculated.  
"Centre?" He repeated, curious. What was he going on about?  
"What makes you who you are. The one thing at the heart of everything you do- the one thing that, truly, defines you." He explained, dramatically. Moving his arms about in great, sweeping gestures to match his almost story telling tone. Well he was certainly enthusiastic about it, he'll give him that, he thought in a failed attempt to perk himself up. Because, add that the list of things he could never have.

A single word stood out in all that- "one". "One thing". He wasn't one thing. He couldn't ever be. He was split, unwhole, governed by two. To think that he might have a centre was laughable. He didn't know what he was, let alone even beginning to wonder who he was. He didn't even know his full name.

He let out a dry chuckle.  
"Yeah, sounds good." He told him. "Must be nice having one thing that sums you up." He said, wistfully. North frowned, and opened his mouth to say something. "No, North, I do not have a centre. That'd mean being one thing. I am two." He told him in the same couldn't care less tone. A look in the mirror was confirmation of that. Was he the demon with the blood red eyes, or the boy with the snow white hair? Like he said, he was torn. He didn't have a centre.

North frowned at this, looking like he was about to say something else, with a very, very, foreign look in his eye. Jack almost didn't recognise it... Was that... sympathy?...

He shook himself out of it. Yeah- ha- nice one. Like he actually cared. He almost snorted to himself. Wow, he'd let himself get sucked in there, huh. He was the spirit no one cared about- and that was just the way things were. He couldn't be less bothered about it. He knew his lot in life. He didn't expect to be treated nicely, just because these people thought he would help them. Well, bad news for them, he couldn't- so there was no point even trying.

A sudden, loud skid noise and bang caught his attention. What in the dark side of the moon? (Yeah, he even had to adapt sayings to suit his split nature, otherwise he'd end up in agony). He turned and saw Sandy outside the room, silently chuckling at something just hidden by the doorframe. A grumpy rabbit soon appeared in it. Apparently hauling himself up after a fall. Oh, yeah, he forgot about that ice he lay down earlier, he sniggered. North burst out into deep belly laughter- not even trying to hold it back- as Bunny glared at the smaller spirit. Then, probably deciding he wasn't worth the trouble, he turned to the Guardian next to him.  
"North, we got trouble, mate. Tooth palace." He informed. North turned serious in an instant.  
"Come on- to the sleigh!" He announced.

Jack stalled, uncertain, reaching one of those deadly tipping points where a desicion had to be made... He eventually reached a truce, and dashed off after them.

Really, he should be long gone- he didn't care in the slightest what happened to those guys- but the mention of the famous Santa Claus' sleigh aroused his curiosity. He could always ditch them whenever he felt like it. He wasn't doing it for them- never for them. He didn't do anything for anyone. But, come on, at the sound of a super cool sleigh open for a ride, who wouldn't jump at the opportunity?

No, he wasn't doing this for them, he told himself. Not for North. Not for Sandy- and definately not because he cared...

...And he would forever deny that he was glad he could stay with them a little bit longer.


	7. Chapter 7

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Six- Sleigh Ride

 **Authors note: next chapter! Including revenge on bunny but not Pitch just yet ^^ please let me know what you think I really love reading your opinions and ideas etc but that's all for now I will be back tommorow with the next chapter^^ see you there!**

By the time he caught up to the Guardians, they'd already got the sleigh out. Darn decisions, they were so annoying- not that that was the real reason he hated them. Still, he had to admit, the sleigh was a pretty sweet ride. It was rigged up with all kind of extras including fins, extra rudders, a globe and a bunch of other stuff. The dashboard (if that's what it was called) was a mish mash of buttons, levers and other mechanisms.

It was just one big toy, and one he would not've hesitated to jump straight in to- if he wasn't suddenly attacked by a massive, bulky reindeer.  
"Whoa!" He dodged out of the way. He laughed tauntingly at the harnessed animal. Missed. He couldn't just let it slide, though- the dark wouldn't allow it- so, an eye for an eye... It slipped, and fell embarrassingly to the floor with a bang. Well, now they were even, back to hopping on the sleigh.

Sandy waved at him as he jumped on, and he grinned back. Looking round North was prepping for take off, and trying get the rabbit on board, but there was no sign of...  
"Where's Tooth?" He asked- out of curiousity (not concern) for the fairy. Sandy made a picture of her above his head and made it zip off to what he assumed was a palace of some sort. Okay, so she'd gone off ahead of them.

His patience snapped. Half a second- that was bad even for him. He looked to see what was taking so long- wait... He saw the look on the face of the Easter Guardian, and the shadows confirmed it. The rabbit was scared. Ooh, this was just precious.

He was tempted to hook him with his staff and drag him on to finally get the ride started, but North beat him to it. He hauled him in by the scruff of the neck like he was Thumper sized.  
"Buckle up!" He called behind him.  
"Woah, wait, where are the seatbelts?!" Bunny wailed, ears wilting. This was going to be even better than he thought- who needs seatbelts. He lived life on the edge.  
"That was just expression." North laughed. "Are we ready?" He yelled ahead of him. The yeti next to him gave him the not all clear, and he continued regardless.  
"Hyah!" He yelled, whipping the reins. Jack braced himself, and the sleigh took off.

It built speed, Jack riding it like a surfboard atop a wave. This was brilliant! It swerved erratically side to side, and rattled and shook as it moved. Then, he felt it jolt with an extra boost of speed. Rocket boosters?! Yes! This really was the ultimate sleigh! And, oh yes- he looked at the track ahead. It curved up the wall, onto the ceiling. Bring it on! He thought, as the world flipped upside down.  
"I hope you like the loop the loops!" He heard North shouting. Somewhere next to him a less cheerful voice lurched and muttered.  
"I hope you like carrots." Ha! The big baby couldn't even take a little loop! Well he could take it one step further.

He pushed off from the wooden floor, curled into a somersault and dropped onto the sleigh, which completed the loop to meet him. He nailed the landing, buzzing with triumph. He saw Sandy clapping enthusiastically, silently cheering the stunt, his hands thrown in the air- well, this was just one big roller coaster after all. This was so awesome- hold up, light up ahead! Here comes the take off!

They shot out of the tunnel and onto some sort of ramp. He grinned- this was it! The reindeer didn't hesitate. The sleigh shot off the edge, and shot into the air... and then they were airborne.

Come on, come on! Give me something more! He thought. He wasn't disappointed. The sleigh flew up and back into another loop.  
"Blast off!" North was yelling at the top of his lungs, Jack yelled with him.  
"Yeeaah!" He jumped onto the back tail, to watch the workshop dwindle into a tiny speck behind them. That was awesome! What was next?! A roll? Dive?! Nope. Just a straight flight. Boring.

He sighed, and flopped onto the seat beneath him. Then a certain rabbit caught his attention. If bunnies could go green, this one had. He was still attempting to keep his breakfast from making a reappearance, and he didn't seem to be doing all that well. A spot of turbulence- barely a jolt by Jack's standards, but it was enough. He got a lovely view of his fluffy rabbit tail, as he threw his top half over the side. The sight of him leaning over like that... halfway off the sleigh... The temptation was just too much. He whipped his legs up from under him with his staff, and he went over. A pretty unflattering scream sounded, growing quieter with increased distance from the sleigh.

Jack laughed- oh that was just brilliant! His face! And he way he flailed and flapped his arms as he tried to fly! He wasn't even sure that kind of scream was physically possible for a guy! Sandy was looking terrified. Staring at the winter spirit in horror. He sighed again- alright, he'd had his fun. He lifted the staff up and over in a big arc, and the world's first flying rabbit got blown on board via his good friend the winter wind.

He was a terrified little bunny at first, curled up and terrified in the floor, but he soon recovered his attitude. He was really going a full rainbow of colours today, huh. First green, then red- North would be proud of the Christmassy hues. The Guardian was steadily getting angrier, as he glared at him- if he wasn't king of death glares himself he might have been impressed.  
"You- you just! What the bloo-!" He spluttered, furiously.  
"Quit complaining." He told him. "The shadows would've quite happily seen you carry on falling." He informed, casually, a silent warning in his words- "that was just a joke, I could do a lot worse if I wanted to, so don't test me".

He ignored the warning and looked like he was going to try and throttle him anyway, but Sandy intervened. He rolled his eyes and created a life sized Jack rag doll for him to punch the living daylights out of. The message was clear. Stop acting like a child, Bunny, you're better than that, he was chastising. Bunny grumbled, and shot him one last glare, before turning to face the front of the sleigh again. That didn't stop Jack from shooting his tongue out at him- acting like an grown up didn't apply to him, he was a kid.  
"Hold on, everyone, I've got a shortcut." North called back, secretly turning gears to try and fit recent events into the jigsaw of trying to figure the winter boy out.

He could've let Bunny fall, but didn't, and he mentioned "the shadows"... So there were shadows in him- he was a sprit of darkness... But, then, why rescue him? Obviously there more to it than that.

He pulled out a glass orb from his pockets- one of his own personal inventions.  
"Ohh noo, I knew I should've taken the tunnels!" Bunny whined, the thought of the lurch of a portal with the airborne, floating sleigh turning him into a whimpering baby again. Huh, Jack thought, his curiousity aroused. He'd been too mad to pay much attention to what it was like going through the portal last time. What did one even look like? The sack fabric wasn't the best window in the world. He peered ahead, eager to see what would happen.

He heard North whisper "Tooth Palace" into some kind of round, orby thing, and watched as he threw it ahead of them. A huge, whirling kaleidoscope of colour appeared, then there was the feeling that he was travelling so fast his face was peeling off. His whole body came alive with a buzz- the energy reverberating through his entire being. It didn't even last half a second before the energy abandoned him and jolted back to normal speed.

Wow! That was awesome! What a rush! And they'd travelled to a completely different place... It was a lot hotter than he would've prefered it, with a few mountains dotting up below them- he always thought they looked weird without a cover of snow on top. Right ahead of them was a mountain, much bigger than the others. It towered above the sleigh, in the distance, but that wasn't what caught his attention. What drew his attention was the dozens of sleek, black shapes that were coming from it... and they were travelling fast. It took only a few seconds for the first of the creatures to reach them.

A flash of black, and golden eyes, shooting past- but their eyes were nothing like the Sandman's. Something about them radiated pure evil... and that tore him.

For a second he was tempted to jump out- join them. A part of him told him they were meant to be with him. Allies. Puppets. Instruments for him to play with. The other part was quietly afraid of them- there was something terrible about these beasts. The way they weren't even fazed by the speeding sleigh coming straight towards them. It wasn't right. They even had to duck out of the way to avoid some...

Then, he saw dots of green dashing ahead of one of the creatures.  
"They're taking the fairies!" Bunny called out. At the appearance of the beasts seemed to have recovered his wits, and his sharp eyes had picked out what they were after. _Fairies?! The Tooth Fairies are in trouble!_ He thought. _Save them! No- let them get taken. Follow the mares. Join them. No! Rescue the little fairies- they need your help!_

He felt a huge pressure slowly descend on his mind, as the peace broke apart. Save the fairies! Join the Nightmares! (He didn't even know how he knew what they were, he just did).

The world dimmed, and clouded, as he was drawn into the impending battlefield of his mind. Panic erupted in him. _No, no- not again! Please, no! No!_

Just as suddenly as the haze descended, it vanished with two words.  
"Take over." His eyes snapped open. _What?- What was he saying?_ Both sides of the fight halted, as confusion and curiosity overcame them. He saw a hand holding out bunch of leather straps. _The sleigh. Take over. Yes._ He clung to offer like a life raft, as both sides came to an agreement: _do it. Steer the sleigh._ It was a prospect that appealed to both.

He didn't even realise he'd pulled himself into a ball- hands spread around his head- but he didn't think about it for even the briefest of seconds. _Steer the sleigh. Steer the sleigh_. The mantra saved him from the chaos, and he was balanced once again.

He ignored the Nightmares- he ignored the fairies- all his focus was on the sleigh. Until one Nightmare that dashed in front of the sleigh couldn't be ignored. North leapt onto the front of the sleigh, and he understood: after it. A chase! Yes- chase was fun! He could agree on that. _Chase it!_ He wove round towers, that had appeared since he came out of his inner battle, the thrill of the chase further unifying him.

It wasn't long before North came within striking distance. Somehow, Jack could read the Nightmare's intentions- see the way it wanted to go. He swept that thought out of his mind, lest it spark something, and instead let himself wonder what was spilling out of it, as North's sabres cut through it.  
"The teeth!" Bunny exclaimed, confused. Sandy held up a handful of the black substance that had made up the beast. A look of similar confusion on his face- it looked like sand.

"Jack, look out!" North called out. The younger spirit realising too late he should've kept his eyes on the air ahead. They were headed straight for a tower.

He had to make a split second decision- the worst kind. Does he stay, and land as best he could? Or fly off, and leave them to their fate? Help or abandon? Literally frozen with indecision for a moment, as good and bad willed him towards both, he somehow made the choice in time.

He jumped.

He left them.

But it was bad to leave them like that, so that meant he could do something good. He asked the wind to catch them, and gently drop the sleigh onto a platform on the tower.

He landed, himself, nearby. Still shaken and weak from the close call with a breakdown earlier. It hadn't even fully begun, but the after effects still shook him... And this sudden quiet didn't make things any easier. What did he do now? The sleigh ride was over- he had no reason to stay. Did he leave? Did he stay with the Guardians? He chastised himself for even considering it. Stay with them?! No, stupid, you need to remain neutral! That recent crack in his mental armour was enough to remind him why. It wasn't like he could do them any good by being here. He should go prank a bunch of kids somewhere- cause a snowstorm. Standing around here was getting tiresome... So why couldn't he bring himself to move.

Why, when he saw the last remaining fairy mourn the loss of her sisters and the teeth, did he not feel good?... It wasn't like he had a heart, or could permit himself to have one. It wasn't like he cared... So why was he still here?


	8. Chapter 8

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Seven- Enemy?

 **Authors note: here's Pitch! Time to see what Jack thinks of him I won't keep you here long^^ just gonna say thanks for being so amazing I hope you enjoy this chapter and I hope you will review it^^ see you tommorow!**

 **To the guest who reviewed thank you^^ I'm glad you think I got it right as it was a little challenging ^^ glad you are enjoying the story and thanks for the review**

"Now this is very exciting." The voice... He didn't know it, but it both unnerved and excited him. Where was it coming from? A subtle feeling, like an extra sense or some kind of instinct, led his gaze to the a ledge above where the Guardians were comforting the distressed Tooth Fairy- or had been until the voice showed up. Now they looked round, searching for the speaker- only they didn't have the heads up that he was right above them.  
"The big four all in one place. I'm a little starstruck." By the time he'd finished speaking, the man had appeared.

He had a kind of pale grey tone to his skin that didn't look too healthy- and black robes that somehow merged with his skin- it was weird, in a somewhat creepy kind of way. His hair was also black, and, actually, he couldn't really tell from this distance, but he was pretty sure his eyes were black too. Little or no colour in them.

He tried to figure out who it was. All Hallows Eve he could rule out immediately- she was a girl, and more into tricks and treats than evil stuff. Erm... what other generally bad, or evil, spirits did he know?... Not that many. He didn't know a lot about the other spirits. He never got too close to them, and kept his distance where possible. He was pretty sure there was some vampire guy hanging about somewhere in the world- was this him? No. Though he matched the pale complexion, this man... he was someone else.

He didn't like how relaxed the shadows were getting. Like he knew him- or was meant to. That side of him felt somehow drawn to the guy in black, with a familiarity that he didn't like. He wouldn't go as far as to say he felt like he was a friend... an associate, maybe? Ally? Whatever the case, considering strongly his good side insisted this man was bad news, he wasn't sure he liked that. He was either greatly unsettled by him, or greatly put at ease... more likely both, somehow.

"Did you like my show on the globe, North? Got you all together, didn't I?" He taunted. Jack didn't know what he was going on about, getting them together, but apparently North did. He stomped a foot in frustration.  
"Pitch!" Tooth's furious voice cut across the air.

Pitch? He thought. As in Pitch Black? The Boogeyman? Okay, he really wished he knew more about him now they were face to face, but he'd avoided every spirit- Mr Boogey included. He was pretty sure, from vague, extremely distant rumours, that he was big, powerful (or had been once) and very, very evil. That'd explain why he was half drawn to him. Wait- this was what the Guardians had wanted his help with?! Defeating Shadowhead here- seriously?! Did they not know half of him was practically the same person?! Who was the genius that thought up that idea?

"You have thirty seconds to return my fairies." Tooth continued. Then came another confusing set of conflicting thoughts. He really wanted to see Tooth punch that guy in the face, but he also wanted to spring to his defence. Stand with him, against the Guardians. It made his head spin so he forced himself to remain unswayed. In favour of none.

"Or what?" Pitch muttered, his voice echoing across the room as he vanished. Jack followed his instinct to a tower opposite the previous one. He'd moved through the shadows. Shadow travel... he didn't know how he knew it, but ,again, he didn't follow up that thought. "You'll stick a quarter under my pillow?" He retorted. Touché, Jack thought, listening intently. That was the only reason he was still here. He was curious to see how this argument would play out. Otherwise, he'd have long gone.

"Why are you doing this?" North asked him. Hm. Fair point, Jack thought. He was here because he was nosey- what was his motive?  
"Maybe, I want what you have. To be believed in." He growled at them. He got to aim that high? Ha- lucky thing. He thinks he's so hard done to, not having any believers? Boo hoo, he thought, rolling his eyes. All he worked towards was not falling apart day by day- what did he have to moan about? He suddenly found he liked the guy a little less. All this for a bit of petty belief?! He didn't deserve to be whining. He just barely struggled to keep hold of his sanity though every day- he had it easy.

"Maybe I'm tired of hiding under beds!" He continued to moan. Jack fought the urge to yawn. Life's hard- deal with it, Shadowface.  
"Maybe, that's where you belong." Bunny threw back at him. First decent thing that's come out the rabbit's mouth, he thought, following Pitch down to just beneath the ledge Bunny was on, until he was hanging off it like a bat, or something. Apparently physics didn't apply to him. Good to know.  
"Go suck an egg, rabbit." He replied, almost drearily. Nice, he thought- he was on no ones side, he could praise whichever one he wanted. "Hold on, is that Jack? Jack No Name?" He teased.

Jack's eyes narrowed. _Don't you dare talk to me like I'm a child_ , he thought dangerously. He'd lived through hell like he wouldn't believe. He was a grenade set to release any time, any day. He could quite easily blow up in his face without a single care in the world... But how did he know about his plight to find his name? He really didn't like him now. "Since when are you all so friendly?" He said. Jack turned behind him, to where he knew the Boogeyman to be standing, and fixed him with a wolf glare. The "however bad you think you are, I'm a lot worse" look.  
"I'm not their friend..." He told him evenly, but a dark warning in his voice. Pitch looked mildly impressed and intrigued that he'd seen through his little shadow swapping trick.

"Or yours." He added- he didn't want there to be any mistake about that. He was owned by no one. He worked for himself- only, himself. Pitch raised his eyebrows.  
"Ahh, a neutral party, then." He clarified. He carried on talking, but that was all Jack heard.

Those words struck him hard. How long had he been haunted by that word? "Neutral." He lived with the constant, surpressed fear that he would forever never be able to impact anything- never make a consequential choice. Doomed to be numb and pointless forever. It took a brief moment for shock to work its way through his mind. Then it passed. Anger took over- a brief red taking over his one blue eye, and half white hair. A scythe blade slammed into the ground and, a millisecond later, Pitch found a razor sharp spike of black ice, tinged with red, skimming the skin of his throat. Balance returned. That was just a warning.

He didn't need to look to know the Guardians were staring at him, but he didn't care in the slightest. This was between him and Mr Boogie. He glared warning daggers at him, as Black's eyes flicked up and down him- examining him with new interest- before he smirked. His eyes briefly met his, and glinted like they were sharing some kind of inside joke. He wondered about that. What had that look meant?

"Fine. If you insist. I guess I'll leave you to you misery. I'd love to stay, but I'm afraid I'm getting a rather cold look around here." He commented smoothly. Jack tightened his grip on his staff- one more word out of place, and he was going to really freeze him. "Besides, I've done what I came for." He finished, snapping his fingers. A jet black, demonic horse leapt out of the shadows- the same as the ones that stole the Tooth Fairies, he remembered. "Oh, and I must thank you, Sandman, for these lovely little pets." He smirked. Sandman? What did he have to do with-? Wait, the horses were made of sand... What had he-? Had he done something to the sand, which brought him joy?! He better not have! He outright hated the dark spirit now- no one messed with the dreamsand, if he could help it.

Before he lash out at him, the horse reared and shot towards a wall. Horse and master melting into a shadow that fell across it, leaving them on those lingering words, and a final laugh that fading off into nothing... Then it was over.

He heard North's voice from back at the tower platform.  
"He's gone." He muttered in amazement. Yes. He was. Jack knew he wasn't anywhere hiding in the shadows. He relaxed, but he knew deep down this wasn't the last they'd seen of- wait, since when had there been a "they"?!

No. He couldn't allow himself to get swept up in this. This was their problem, not his. He wasn't bothered about this... and even if he was, it didn't matter. He couldn't help anyway.

Although... He did have a moment, he realised. The dark of the moment when he lashed out at Pitch made the shadows fade. He could stay, at least a little while, without becoming restless... And... if he was lucky, maybe... he could even risk some words of comfort to the sad, little fairy who knelt beside some hollow, empty, golden caskets. He could allow himself this brief moment to comfort her.

For a minute at least... he could let himself care.


	9. Chapter 9

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Eight- Get Things Straight

 **Authors note: back with today's update^^ not a massively big or important on but i hope you enjoy it all the same ^^ please review I love hearing your thoughts so much but that's all for now so until the next chapter- see to tommorow^^**

He slowly approached the silent Tooth Fairy. She was gazing, forlornly, at the empty tooth holders. In the background he heard Bunny talking to North, but he ignored it. Only catching the first snatches of what he was saying.  
"Okay, so you were right about Pitch. That doesn't mean we need another demon spirit to deal with-." He let the words slip out of his mind- thankfully without the darkness around he could let it slide.

He crouched down beside Tooth. She didn't even acknowledge his presence. He better make the most of being good- it wouldn't be long before the darkness returned.  
"I'm sorry about fairies." He began, sincerely. Distantly, he noticed his reflection's hair was all white. He relieved with that, but he didn't care about himself right now. Tooth managed a small smile.  
"They put up such a fight." She recalled, fondly thinking of their brave attempts to escape the dark mare's clutches. He opened his mouth to say something more, but his time was up.

A patch of deep crimson coloured a part of reflection's hair. It had only been a brief clouding of darkness, so that was all he got now of light. That was all he had time for: a quick "sorry"... And now he had to be numb again. He barely had time to mourn how short his time under the light had been, when he felt the darkness creep back in to take up half his mind again.

Still, after a brief argument, he managed to convince the darkness to stay: _let's at least get some answers about what the big deal with the chompers._

"I understand why he'd take the fairies." He muttered. "But why the teeth? What's so special about them?" He asked, neutrally.  
"There's nothing special about the teeth." She answered. "It's the memories inside that's makes them so important." He frowned, confused, waiting for her to continue deeper. She did. "That's why we collected them, my fairies and I. They hold the most important memories of childhood. We watched over the teeth, and helped people when they'd forgotten what was important." She told him, with a hint of pride in her voice.

She clearly loved what she was did, and the joy it brought to others. Jack wondered what it must be like... To be able to care about so many people... To see that many smiles, and know... they were because of you... Not that he was bothered. He didn't care what he made people feel.

Tooth smiled.  
"We had everyones here- North's and Bunny's... Even yours." She remembered. He blinked at her.  
"My memories?" What good would having the memories of a (whatever the fancy word was for split personality was), immortal, good/bad spirit do her?  
"From when you were young. Before you became a spirit." She told him. He felt the whole world stop spinning... What...? Before he became... He was something before he was this?! He'd had a life before he became this- this- contradiction?! He'd been a normal person once?! With a regular mind?! Without having to fear for his sanity, day by day?!...

He couldn't imagine it. He'd been fighting his whole life. He couldn't even... begin to dream what it might be like... to be without the constant battles of dark and light... He'd had a life before this stuggle. What had he been like?! Had he been good or bad? And, wait, if he had been one, then... what did that mean he was now? Was he secretly more a part of one than the other?! Did he have one part of him that was the real him?! Might he one day find a way to let that true him... take over...

It was too much. The idea was too perfect... and that was what crushed it.

Him. Be one thing. Ha- he thought bitterly- he stood more chance of making it rain at the Pole... For a moment there, he'd almost... let himself, hope... But, no. That flame had died now. Too feeble to even begin to burn. Besides, what he had been once didn't matter. He wasn't that anymore now. He was just the evil saint. Light and dark so equally he cancelled himself out so that he was nothing. He wasn't ever going to live like everyone else did. He had to just deal with it.

Tooth saw his peculiar expression- one of scolding holding back sadness and regret.  
"Jack..?" She began, then she gasped. A couple of bright, purple feathers drifted away from her side. Her breath quickened as she felt it. That horrifying hollowing feeling when someone stopped believing in you magnified by a thousand. Her fairies were gone- they weren't collecting the teeth- which meant children were waking up to find their tooth still there, and they... stopped believing in her... By the dozens, kids faith in her was falling. She could feel it like a slowly growing hole inside her. "The children... They they don't believe in me, anymore..." She muttered, pure sadness weighing down on her. First, her beautiful fairies were gone- and the teeth, which she'd pledged to protect... and now the children were losing faith... No... she felt her feet make contact with the ground, as her wings slowed wih numb disbelief... and then on top of it all... She saw Jack turning and walking away...

What? He was just going? He was abandoning them? He couldn't just leave her like this?! Why?! Why, after seeing for himself the despair the Boogeyman brought- after striking out at him himself- why did he still refuse to help them?!  
"Jack?!" She called out, slight desperation in her voice. He couldn't be abandoning her as well- that was just one thing too many. She couldn't take that many losses. She ran towards him, and reached out a hand to stop him. "Where are you-?" He began... and then she went silent, eyes wide.

... As she attempted to pull him back towards her, she'd caught a glimpse of his eye... and it wasn't the red one that found it so easy to be careless and hide emotion. It was his ice blue one... and what she saw in it stunned her.

She stopped on the spot... and then she said the words that the winter spirit would refuse to accept no matter what.  
"You want to help..." She muttered, out loud. She saw that look in his eye... He wanted to help them- and that was the first step! Perhaps, if they tried convincing him, then he would! Perhaps, he might help! He wants to, afterall... But that hope shrank when he turned back, to address both her and the other Guardians.

That look in his eyes- even the blue one- had gone. All that was there now was a hardness- not a flicker of any emotion in either of them.  
"Alright, let me get this straight." He told them, stone faced, a hard edge to his voice. "I'm not your friend, and I'm not your enemy. I cannot help you." He turned his eyes back to meet the vibrantly coloured Tooth Fairy's. "Want has nothing to do with it. I shan't help you, but I won't hinder you either. I am, as Pitch said, a neutral party... And I can't ever be otherwise." He finished, whispering the last words, but in a way that could still be heard.

He sprang off into the wind. It carried him off. Away from the tower... and staring Guardians. What had prompted him to say that? He thought. That last little bit at the end... It wasn't good or bad, but it was... open... He'd never spoken about his... problem. Not that he'd had anyone to tell. He never opened up like that- even to himself- even to that minute degree.

He didn't know why he'd said it... Perhaps there was something about her deep, amethyst eyes, and what he'd seen within them... Grief, shock, confusion... and concern.


	10. Chapter 10

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Nine- Contest

 **Authors note: back with today's update^^ hope you enjoy it^^ sorry yesterday's was a little small but this one is longer so yeah hope you like it please let me know what you think of it you all know how much I love them (I only bring it up every update hehe^^) but seriously thanks for the lovely brilliant support I'm getting with this story^^ oh right chapter sorry ^^ I won't keep you any longer see you tommorow! Enjoy!**

He didn't know where he was. A city with buildings- tall ones, but not skyscrapers. The clustered structures could take a long time to cover in frost and ice if he wanted them to, so he just worked his way through every one (an afterthought following one of them leading him to bringing down a slight snowfall- both good and bad depending on people's views). It was a somewhat wearisome task, but he needed it. It stopped him thinking, if he was acting instead.

He couldn't think about the Guardians, or what he felt about them. Their situation, his connection to it all- Nope. He was intentionally cutting himself off from all things consequential. He was going to be a balanced nothing again. A neutral party. Carrying on like he had when he was around them was dangerous.

Already, in less than half a day, he'd been taken over by the darkness in the workshop, teetered along the edge of a breakdown on the sleigh- he didn't even want to think about how confusing his mind had become when Pitch showed up... and then there was that final moment when he'd comforted the Tooth Fairy and... He blanked it out. It never happened. One question he could never ask himself was "Why?" That just invited disaster. And it was all he could almost think when he half recalled that moment. He never let it fully entered his mind for the risk it might spark something. He did that with a lot of things, so he'd become rather good at it... Ignoring things, or pretending they weren't there, or hadn't happened. Such was his life. It had to be that way because the alternative was hell. Well... a greater hell anyway.

The point being (he swung his staff across some random large building's roof and covered the whole thing in frost crystals) he'd never been so unbalanced as that morning... or whenever it was (time zones were confusing when you just jumped to and fro). In those few hours he'd been more unstable- had more "mind swings"- than he had in a year. That wasn't good... So, no, he wasn't thinking about it, anymore. Everything from meeting Bunny in the alleyway, to leaving the palace never happened. As far as he was concerned, he was lucky if he'd never have to see any of them ever again.

A burst of noise and colour made him look up at the sky, and he quickly hardened himself. Well there goes the luck.

He shouldn't be surprised- it suited his usual luck trend- but why were they here? He followed the sleigh's progress across the sky, and watched as North set down on one of the flat roofed buildings. Tooth and Sandy had left the sleigh mid flight, and were now heading towards a random house each. He could just about hear distant rambling that told him Tooth was on a knasher frenzy. Bunny and North left the sleigh the instant they landed, and also went to a random building. He watched as they vanished inside for around ten to twenty seconds, then emerged and went to a different house. What in the dark star were they doing? He had no idea.

What were they doing? What were they doing? The question burnt repeatedly in his mind, but he couldn't stay. These guys were trouble. They'd split him. The fear of that outmatched his curiosity. Neither side of him wanted the other to take over, and no part of him liked pain. He turned away, about to leave, if not for the warm tinkling of sand. He'd been spotted.

He looked back to see Sandy standing there, waving at him.  
"Hey Sandy." He muttered, neutrally. Then he realised he could get an answer. Ask him. Ask him. "What are you guys doing? He asked. In response, Sandy held out a little, tiny, white thing in his hand. "A tooth?" He muttered. Sandy nodded. Oh, so that was it. They were collecting the teeth. Since the little fairies were gone, the Guardians were taking their place. Sandy gestured towards the others, invitingly.

Jack's eyes lowered to the floor.  
"You know I can't help you, Sandy." He muttered, denying the sadness he felt and demolishing it as he did so. Already, he could feel the conflicting thoughts starting to form. Sabotage them- stop their attempts! Help them- go collect the teeth yourself! He had to leave before he met further disagreement... and then it clicked. He wanted to cause some chaos... and help them out at the same time. What better way to do that, than to do the thing he was best at? Pranks. He could stop their attempts to take the teeth, then take the tooth himself! Hinder and help them- he could do it all at once!

He turned round to fully face the Sandman who was looking hopefully and expectantly at him. He nodded. Sandy flung his arms in the air, and cheered silently.

Jack's grin grew, and he ran past him to a building he'd just seen an oversized rabbit head into... and waited above the window for his exit. It didn't take long for him to emerge with a smug victory grin on his face- time to change that. The rabbit yelled in shock, as he slipped on a mysterious chute of ice that appeared underneath him. As he went sliding down the roof, Jack went in for a flyby. And... yes! Nabbed the tooth! Haha! He smirked down at the grumpy rabbit, tossing his new prize up into the air to show off it off. A flash of gold, and it never came back down.  
"Hey!" He called, indignantly, at the retreating sandcloud- Sandy giving a little teasing wave from on top. Oh, so it's going to like that? Jack thought, in perfect unity. Game on.

He went from outracing the Guardians, and leaving little ice substitutes for them to find, to intercepting them as the went for the next one, to freezing them on the spot just as they almost reached one. (He reserved that one for Bunny). He remembered once he went to boobytrap one, but Bunny had appeared before he could do anything. Holding the tooth up, and laughing tauntingly at him. He'd scowled- he didn't like people stopping his fun. Bunny didnt notice the sudden red creep over his hair, and unexpectedly found himself froze to the wall, in a spiderweb of black ice.

Although, he didn't just deal out pranks- he was sometimes the victim of them too. He once jumped through a window, and ended up in a rabbit warren tunnel. Another time he found an arrow under a pillow instead of a tooth (that was thanks to North). And that once time Sandy stole his tooth wasn't the last either. He was really enjoying himself! More than he had since, well... ever. Things were so much more fun with company. He knew, of course, that it wouldn't last, and he'd have to go the lone wolf again, eventually. But, that just made it all the more reason to enjoy himself now.

The strange thing was, though, he never caught sight of Tooth, really. A few glimpses, but she was that quick at collecting the teeth, she so rarely bumped into anyone. He thought they'd probably meet up eventually, and he wasn't quite sure how he felt about that... Definately confused, but beyond that he had no idea.

Still, after the thirty first house, in the sixth country (they'd passed Burgess at some point, and he may or may not have woken Jamie with a snowball to the window, so he could watch the Guardians go by- which you weren't supposed to do, but he didn't care), at house thirty two, he finally bumped into her.

He'd entered it wondering what prank to set up. Maybe he'd ice the floor to make the collector slip? Or block up the window with an invisible, cold barrier so they run into it- that one was hilarious! Then he realised the room wasn't empty. It had a green, feathered fairy in it. She was sat beside the bed like she'd been watching the kid sleep, until he'd burst in with his unexpected arrival.  
"Oh." He said. "I'm sorry, I'll just go-." He began, turning slightly. He wanted to stay, but that was also the reason he wanted to leave.

He wanted to be with her, which meant he might be getting attatched to her, which was bad. Very bad. For him, especially- and her, if he broke down right next to her and trapped her in a solid tomb of ice. And there was also the quiet whisper of darkness at the back of his mind telling him she was "the enemy" and he couldn't trust her. It said that about all the Guardians- but not, funnily enough, about Pitch. He didn't want to know what'd happen if the darkness took over when she was around.

He went to leave before he could get too confused, but she stopped him with a quick but quiet.  
"No, no, it's okay. You can stay if you want." He paused at her wording. "If you want." That turned him over like a nest of angry bees... want? What did he want? did he want to stay? But, the choice as to what he did next had to be made. He couldn't let want influence it. He had to satisfy both good and bad- and one was definately getting really impatient with being here. The shadows were really urging him to go and pull some more pranks, but then there was the light, wanting him to stay. There it was again! "Want." Since when had that mattered to anything?!

He never knew what he wanted, even if he could ever have it! But he didn't know if he could have it, because he didn't know what he wanted! He couldn't let himself wish, or dream, because chances were some part of him wouldn't like it, and strike up an argument, and then he'd lose balance, and get forced into the mammoth agony of a breakdown. Bright shadows, this was so confusing- which, by the way, was also dangerous, as that also led to breakdowns.

The huge muddle of thoughts in his mind stalled him. The indecision, and beginnings of a fight, left a long enough pause for Tooth to speak again.  
"You came back." She said, curiously. An unspoken "why" in her voice. There was that deadly question, again- this was why being around the Guardians was so dangerous. He should've flown away when he had the chance!  
"Yeah, well, I don't intend to make it a habit." He answered, truthfully. He got lucky this time- he was pretty sure he wouldn't again. He knew how his luck went.  
"But, I thought you said you couldn't help." She pointed out, pushing further with the dreaded "why." He realised he could no longer avoid it, and gave a roundabout answer.  
"Mm. Call it a lucky set of circumstances." He told her. She frowned, confused (well that made both of them).  
"How do you mean?" She asked. She really wanted to figure him out.

She wanted to help him with his... problem. But she couldn't do that if she didn't know what it was. Watching him now, she noticed a little more of his hair was white than usual. Did that have to do with anything? She remembered whenever he used any dark energy it always went all red- and when he was being nicer it went all white. But how did that fit into his problem? She had to know. He needed her help- and she was all too willing to give it, but she needed to know hat was wrong.  
"Its confusing." He stated, simply. Evasively.  
"I'm listening." She told him, kindly. A reassuring "I'm here for you." She had to get him to open up. He almost had at the palace earlier, she just had to do the same again now. She just had to pray he'd tell her. But Jack knew he couldn't.

Even if it weren't for the darkness forbidding him to tell her anything, since she was "the enemy", he still wouldn't tell her. He was a bomb. Telling her the problem would get her closer to him, make her want to help him. But if she did that, then she was in the same eternal danger of the breakdowns as he was.

He avoided everyone, not just because they caused the breakdowns, but because they could be hurt by them... Although, of course, the real reason he kept away was for himself. He didn't want to feel the pain of the breakdowns- the reason for blocking her out was completely selfish. It wasn't because he cared, because he couldn't care. The darkness would declare war if he did.

"I can't tell you." He said, shutting down her advances to help.  
"Just like you "can't help" now?" She pointed out with a sly smile. He almost chuckled at that.  
"Yeah... maybe we'll find a lucky set of circumstances where I could explain that too." He grinned, then jumped out the window before she could respond- the boredom of the conversation getting to much, as he was forced to move on do something else. He sighed- he could never settle... But, that was his life. It wouldn't ever change... Ever. Even if he weren't alone in this fight- but he was, so that made it even more impossible.

He thought about what he'd said just then. A lucky set of circumstances where he might finally open up and get someone to help. Yeah, right. The chances were next to nothing. The idea- laughable. What could ever happen that would lead him to want to dump his problem on someone? Drag them down with him if anything happened? And get the darkness away long enough to let him actually say it?

Like he said- next to nothing. And he wasn't sad that he couldn't ever tell anyone- wasn't upset that he could never recieve help, or comfort. Wasn't begrieved by the fact he could never get close to anyone... Because that was his life.

He couldn't ever be friendly with someone. The darkness would never allow it.


	11. Chapter 11

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Ten- Fight

 **Authors note: hey^^ so I think you can guess what happens next- EPIC FIGHT SCENE!^^ hope you enjoy it- it was so much fun to write! Please review to let me know what you think ooh and massive thank you to guest TGS who pointed out a few things about the eclipse thing**

 **IMPORTANT NOTE- things regarding the eclipse have changed slightly- you'll find out how next chapter but if you want to check the first two chapters I'm gonna alter them too a little. The next chapter should explain it all though so dont have to^^ im just letting you know so you're not surprised when things about the eclipse are slightly different**

 **that's all though enjoy the chapter and I'll see you tommorow^^**

The tooth collection went on pretty much as normal... until he saw the Nightmare. That was when things changed.

He felt it appear, and knew it was watching them- spying for Pitch- but he didn't know what to do. Tell the others? Destroy it? Tell it what he knew? Follow it? He couldn't decide, but the indecision worked in its favour. It spotted his keen gaze, and vanished into the shadows before he could decide what to do. He didn't like it, but what could he do. Tell the Guardians? That'd be the right thing to do, but that was the point. His dark side wouldn't let him do that. So he kept his mouth shut, and his eyes open.

It was another one or two towns later, he felt more. Two this time, but the timing was unfortunate. North had opened up a portal, and was about to drive through it, when he noticed the mares. He stopped, instinctively, as he felt them, and in the moment he decided he was going to do something about them, the sleigh vanished through the portal.

He found himself staring at the place it had been... Oh well, he thought... He knew they'd have to go their seperate ways eventually. He couldn't stay collecting teeth forever. He sighed, softly- not that he was sad to see them go or anything.

A swirling of sand behind him made him turn. Sandy was there,looking confused at him. The Guardian hadn't gone through the portal?  
"I thought you'd gone." He said, confused. Sandy shook his head, then he gave him a pointed look- gesturing to the torn spirit, then the empty sky where the portal had been. "Why didn't you go?" he was asking. He turned to look behind the golden man.  
"Nightmares." He muttered. Sandy frowned as he caught sight of them. Under the gaze of the dreamsand master, they fled. Sandy turned back to Jack. "I'll take this one- you take that one", he communicated through arrows, pointing to the respective horses. Jack grinned. A chase- chases were fun. Lets get them. He was in agreement.

The wind grew into a gale, and shot him towards the horse on the right, Sandy zoomed towards the one on the left. He didn't fly at top speed just yet- there'd be no fun if he just caught it outright. No, he'd let the Nightmare think its got away, right before he cuts it down. He followed it, as it wove through the towering buildings around them, catching glimpses of Sandy's own similar chase, but not taking any notice. He was completely fixated on his own. Get it. Get it. Get it. Get it! The urge was too strong to ignore. He fired a blast of ice at it!... And then there was silence ahead of him.

"Yes!" He cheered, as he went up to it. Wow, this thing was weird. Then again, he supposed, it isn't everyday you see sand frozen.  
"Here I am thinking you're a neutral party, and then you go and kill one of my Nightmares. That's not very neutral of you." He heard Pitch's taunting voice come from the shadows, and glared at the building he'd appeared on. Not even blinking at the sudden appearance- he'd seen it coming, afterall.  
"Everything I do is for my benefit, Pitch." He growled at him. "If I feel like shooting one of your Nightmares, that's my business." Pitch chuckled.  
"Then I suppose its your business if you hang out with the enemy." He said, smoothly. Enemy... The word reverberated round his head, awakening the dark side of his mind, so that it rose and started seeking to take control. He tried to hold it back, a snarl disfigured his lips with the effort. Pitch jumped away from something beside him. What?

Confusion helped take his mind of the darkness, but he couldn't ignore it forever. Pitch soon recovered himself.  
"Well, speak of the devil." He smirked. Sandy didn't waste time on words, or symbols, he just burst straight out with his golden whips- fast and furious. Pitch had dance like a ballerina to avoid them. Jack was completely frozen as he watched. Which side was he? Who should he help? Black or gold? Shadow or moon? Guardian or Boogeyman? Who did he support?!

He was incapacitated by the choice, but before the inner battle could even truly start, shouting jolting him back to reality. What was-? A black blotch attached to the end of Sandy's whip was getting beat up on the buildings surrounding them, then got thrown to the ground. Wow- did Sandy really just..? Huh. He guessed Pitch really was just a big baby.

He followed Sandy down to where the Boogeyman scampered away from them pitifully. He had to admit, it was enjoyable.  
"Okay. Easy, Sandy." He grovelled. "Look, it was stupid of me to mess with your dreams, so how's this?" He offered. Jack immediately grew suspicious. Offers from dark, shadowy figures were rarely good whichever way you looked at it. "You can have them back." He glared at them, malevolently.

Demonic whines sounded from all around them, as Nightmares appeared from every angle. Even the darkness, which had originally reassured him they were allies, was unsure. Having this many of the creatures moving straight towards you... He felt threatened. It was all he could do to stop himself lashing out, immediately, and tearing them, and everything around them, apart (including himself in the process). He backed up until Sandy was right behind him. It wasn't that he wanted to watch Sandy's back, he told himself, but that he wanted Sandy to watch his. Pitch mounted the head horse that led the charge. A tense silence permeated the air... Those seconds were excruciating. He could never stand to stay still for too long, but with all the emotions running wild around his head, he struggled not to lose it right there that instant... Then... "Boo."

All hell broke loose. The Nightmares charged as one. He was frozen by indecision again. Defend! But they're allies. Stop them! They won't hurt me. Luckily, Sandy acted for both of them. He shot into the air, dragging Jack with him, as confusion continued to dominate his mind. Why am I fleeing? Why are they coming towards me? Attack them! Attack them, damn it! They're not going to hurt me! They're my-! One crashed into him with the force of a charging rhino. The breath was knocked out of him, as brief pain shocked through his system. It... it had just... it attacked him. The shock banished the confusion. Fight. Fight! Fight! Fight! Perhaps the attack should've terrified him, but it didn't.

A cold, blazing fury slowly built up in his veins- every heartbeat a loud beat in his ears, as a blood rage descended. They! They just-! They dare! The darkest crimson overcame every inch of his hair, and the most savage blood red burned with pure fury in his eyes. The darkness purely dominated every part of his mind. The air around him crackled- thrumming with dark chaos energy. Occasional flickers of red lightning sparking near him. The staff had turned into deadly pointed scythe- a weapon he intended to make full use of. He was filled with complete, untamed fury. With a savage, primal roar he threw himsel at the Nightmares. Kill them! Kill them all! Every last one! Slice them! Cut them down! Destroy! Kill! The endless onslaught continued.

It wasn't long before the Nightmares were actually running from him, but that was just fuel to the fire. He pursued them. How dare they turn and run! Face me! Face me, cowards! Come and suffer! Let me slice you! He didn't notice that the other Guardians had entered the battle, nor would he have cared. All that mattered was the demise of the black beasts, and the storm of red chaos and black ice he rained down on them in a maelstrom of darkness. All that stood before him went down- no matter what the creature was. Kill! Kill! Destroy! Obliterate! Get them! Make them die! The madness had completely washed everything in red. It nulled his senses. He didn't spot one, bold Nightmare slip behind him, past his guard. His eyes widened as he caught sight of it. Too late. A hint of blue appeared in one, as terror hit him in a sudden flood.

It disintegrated, as a green blur sped past... And suddenly he was breathing heavily. He looked round... He was in a battlefield. What was going-? The mist of rage had evaporated leaving him lost, confused and scared.  
"Are you okay?" He heard the voice come beside him, as the Tooth Fairy flew closer, to stop by him. Concern shining in her eyes. He just didn't know what to say. What was going on? He was panting from exhaustion and terror. His hair was pure white- all traces of red had vanished.  
"I... I think.." He started, but stopped due to his laboured breathing. "Where's...?" He looked round. North was cutting through Nightmare after Nightmare with his sabres, Bunny throwing boomerangs off the back of the sleigh, and Sandy... The world stopped.  
"Sandy." He muttered. The dream master was in trouble. He was completely surrounded by black sand, yet he still battled on, fiercely. No. Not Sandy. He had to help- he needed his help! He forced himself to bury his fear and confusion- focussing instead on shortening he distance between him and Sandy. Have to save him. Have to save him.. and then he saw it. Pitch standing on a black cloud beside him.

He saw the whole thing- eyes wide in horror.

Pitch drawing back the arrow...

The release...

It flew for a second...

Then it struck the golden Guardian in the back, burying deep.

Jack felt his heart stop. His mind went so blank with shock, the wind around him dropped and he felt himself grow weightless- or maybe that was the sickening feeling as though the world had been flipped on his head.  
"Nooooo!" He screamed- a shout of pure horror and disbelief. He threw himself back into the attempt to reach him. Pushing himself harder than he ever had before. Black spots danced in front of his eyes the wind was carrying him so fast, but it still wasn't enough. Faster!... Faster!... Faster!... Sandy!.. Come on, come on! This isn't close enough! Have to get there in time! Can't let him-. He broke off the thought. The clouds of black and gold sand grew microscopically as he drew closer. The gold was slowly diminishing. Not enough! Nowhere near enough- please! Faster! The gold slowly slowly shrank, until he couldn't even see it anymore. No, please! Just a little longer! Please! He has to make it! He can't-! A small burst of dulled light amidst the dark cloud... and then the gold was gone.

Sandy was gone.

He felt his very being had been struck... No... Not Sandy... no- no! How could-. And then the dark haze descended. If had been mad before, that was nothing to how furious he was now. He literally glowed with anger. Pure, untamed evil radiated from his presence, as his demonic gaze landed on Pitch.

YOU! Every ounce of fury he possessed now focussed on the Nightmare King. You killed him! You took him away from me! You! You die! After that, the fury raging within him was so complete he couldn't even form thoughts anymore. All that was in his mind was a single, powerful urge. Kill him. Destroy Pitch. Make him suffer. Make him bleed!

He sped towards the dark spirit with unmatched speed- his fury bolstering his strength. Pitch looked down and saw the tiny, little neutral charging towards him... and he raised his arms. A huge tidal wave of Nightmares reared towards him- thousands of them all merged in one single, ruthless attack. But the uncontrolled fury that was red demon would not be stopped. He wasn't fazed by the mountain of darkness charging towards him- not even when it was right on top of him! It sped towards him in a torrent of black!.. They collided...

Barely a second's silence passed, before a blast of blazing, red light obliterated the lower section of Nightmares. It exploded out of the dark sand, and forced its way up it with the force of a meteor. Those watching stared in open terror and horror at the size and power of the monster that had been unleashed. It forced its way against the tide of Nightmares like it was cutting through water. What should've been an impossible amount of effort appeared to be child's play to the beast before them. Untamed. Unstoppable. And it was headed straight for Pitch.

The Boogeyman could only watch in horror as the heart of the pulsating red light got closer... and closer... and within that dark, raging heart- the demon itself. Closer... and then it erupted out, and reared above him. A vision from the depths of hell itself!

The glowing, demonic eyes lacking any sanity or mercy- ruled purely by rage and a thirst for blood! Razor edged scythe raised above his head, ready to cleave downwards! An auror of utter malevolence and evil radiated from his very core. Pitch was righteously terrified at the monster in front of him... That burning look of death and no mercy...

Time restarted again, and the scythe flew down like a guillotine blade with the sound of a wild, inhuman creature echoing through the air! Pitch jumped back- the leap saving his very life. The blow knocked him back into the horizon, rather than knocking his head off. The force like a volcanic eruption, entirely focussed on that one being. If he wasn't immortal, he wouldn't have stood a chance.

He hit the ground. Hard. All but destroyed from the attack. Not a single Nightmare survived from his infinite army... He had more- many, many more- but still... Such a show of power left him rattled- not to mention sore. He glanced up at the neutral party- obviously, not so neutral, he thought... But imagine what a power like that could do, if working for him. If he was so injured by it, what would it do to the Guardians?

He watched the tiny dot fall- the effort of the collosal attack knocking him out. A green blur caught him, and lowered him down to the sleigh. He traced it across the sky, until it vanished into a portal.

He'd thought the little winter spirit was playing a game. The double agent. The traitor in their midst- and so he'd played along. Sending the Nightmares at him as he did the Guardians. But that attack of the young spirit on him was no act. He was wrong. He wasn't a neutral party- he was a blank canvas. Innocent until given reason to be otherwise. But balanced scales could be tipped either way.

His strength had been dealt a huge blow by that single attack, and yet, in spite of it all, he chuckled, darkly. He shouldn't be too hard to manipulate. After all, the boy was already half shadows- and he knew all his worst fears. It shouldn't be too hard to push him over the edge. He knew how to talk to shadows- being their master did have its perks. He couldn't control the boy directly through them, but he didn't have to. All it needed, was a simple plan... patience... And he knew as well as anyone... The shadows could wait.

He laughed again. The Guardians might as well just give up now. The scales were set to tip against them.

He'd already won.


	12. Chapter 12

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Eleven- Mourning

 **Authors note: back with the next chapter^^ can I just say how amazed I am at how much support I'm getting with this story! Seriously thank you Sooo much to every single one of you get her you've reviewed(especially you guys) favourites followed or just simply read the story thank you^^ okay so without further adieu here's today's chapter! Please review you know how much it means to me and I will be back tommorow with the next update^^ see you then!**

He just felt hollow. So profoundly empty, he didn't know what to do with himself. He never knew what to think or feel at the best of times, but now... he was a mess.

After the massive meltdown when the darkness took over, the shadows had abated. They were gone. He was just good. He finally had a bit of peace.. and he felt so relieved. He'd never done something that bad before, and in all the centuries of his life he'd never felt so settled and relaxed as he did now. He felt... happy- such a foreign feeling to him. The kind of happy when you are just content. At peace... The calm after a shock wave of relief...

And then he felt guilty for being happy, when Sandy... He couldn't even think about Sandy. It was too hard- too painful. It ate away at him, leaving him feeling dead inside... Then he wished the darkness was here, so that he didn't have to put with this horrible sadness- the grief, and the pain of loss... And then he felt annoyed for wanting the darkness back when he was finally at peace- and then he felt guilty that he was at peace, and so it went on and on in an endless cycle of confusion. He was messed up. Perhaps even moreso than usual- even without the shadows splitting his head.

But had they been, he would've noticed that there was a presence there- listening and watching, figuring him out. Know your enemy. One of the most basic pieces of advice people will ever hear in war, and the Guardians he knew well, but still he knew very little about how this boy worked. He couldn't make a move on him now, not without the shadows touching his mind. But once he understood, and the shadows returned, he'd strike. He just had to wait, watching silently from the shadows.

Jack remained unaware of his presence, staring out the window. He didn't know how long he'd sat here, by this window. For once, he could sit and allow himself to settle. He didn't have to move every constant second... but he could've been sat there for minutes, or hours. Nothing changed to judge the time by. He just sat, and thought... and mourned his fallen friend (could he consider him that, even? He didn't care what he was to him- friend or not, he was sad he was gone). Sandy. The only person who'd ever brought him any happiness in his life of caging himself up. The only person who'd cared about him- even remotely. He was the closest thing he got to any form of interaction, or connection, with anyone else... now he was gone. He had no one. One of the tiny slivers of light in the dark lake of his life had blinked out. He was gone.

He didn't save him- it was his fault! He should've got there! He should've saved him! He should've done something- rescued him!... But he didn't.

The Sandman was dead...

He heard soft, but heavy, footsteps behind him. He absentmindeldly went through a quick, mental checklist. Bunny wouldn't check on him- neither would the yetis- and Tooth wouldn't make footsteps, so it must be North. Surely enough, he heard his gentle voice beside him.  
"Are you alright?" He asked. A painful, bitter laugh escaped him. That had to be the best question to ever ask him- like asking a blind man what they think of a new haircut- asking him, if he was okay.  
"Alright?! I've never been alright! My whole life I've spent not being "alright"." He said, straining to keep some form of control in his voice. He finally had peace- he was not going to ruin it by having an emotional breakdown. But Sandy was gone- he should be broken. But he wouldn't want that. But it doesn't matter- he's gone! Man in the moon, he was just a wreck.

North regarded him, taking in his response, before sitting down on the windowsill next to him.  
"Alright, Jack, what is the problem? I know there is something wrong, but until I know what the problem is, I can't do anything." He invited, reassuringly. What wasn't wrong with him? Jack thought-almost laughing bitterly again, but he didn't. How could North ask that?! Sandy was gone! How could he even pretend he even gave the slightest care in the world about him?!  
"You're asking me this now? When Sandy-." He began.  
"If Sandy was here," North interrupted, gently. "He'd want to help, just as much as we do." He said. Jack went silent for a while, not quite sure what to say at first. North held his breath for an answer...

Then.  
"Why?" Jack muttered, barely audible. "Why would you want to help me?" He muttered. No one cared, and rightly so. He was a monster- a disaster- a grenade. Why would anyone want to help, or get close to, that? North smiled warmly at him.  
"Because you are a good person, Jack." He told him. Now there was a lie if ever he saw one. He snorted, and looked pointedly out of the window. A good person. Yeah right. Did he not see the beast he became under the influence of darkness? The disasters he'd caused over the years?! A good person- he was as far from it as you could get.

North saw his response, and reached out a hand to place on his shoulder, and turn him away from the window towards him.  
"You are, Jack. I know you." He said. Know him? He thought. He didn't even know himself- how could anyone know him? He was a mystery, wrapped in an enigma, deep fried in shadow and dipped in sub zero ice- impossible to touch without getting bitten. No one could ever know him- they'd be in incredible danger if they even tried. How was North insisting he was a good person after the atrocities he'd committed?

He looked down- doubts and disbelief swamping his mind.  
"I don't look at what's here." North said, pointing to his now white, soon to be overtaken by red, hair. "... Or this." He continued, moving his finger to point as his blue eyes, that could become so demonic. "I look at what's in here." He finished, pointing right at the centre of his chest. Jack sighed. He was touched, and it was a nice thought, but it wasn't true.

He halfheartedly pushed his hand away.  
"You're making out like I have a heart." He said, emotionless. "I'm not allowed one." North's eyebrows knitted together at this. He knew the boy had a heart- he'd seen it for himself. If he didn't he wouldn't be so upset over Sandy. To say he didn't have a heart was a lie... so why was he lying to himself? And why did he say he wasn't allowed one?  
"What do you mean?" He queried. Jack sighed.  
"I mean, I can't care. I can't get close to anyone, be bothered about anyone, or help them, because the darkness won't let me." He explained. North took this in- he remembered him saying a similar thing at the Tooth Palace... Then there was that thing about the darkness. He'd said something about it back on the sleigh... and there was the way the red took over his hair, and almost seemed to force him to do evil things. He had numerous theories, but none he could actually put any credit to unless he knew the full story. He needed to know how this started.

"How long have you been like this?" He asked.  
"As long as I've lived." Jack muttered in reply. So he'd always lived in the shadow of darkness, North thought. No wonder he appeared to be so damaged, and broken inside.  
"And what happened for you to become... this?" He questioned. He'd decided long ago this wasn't natural- this wasn't something that happened on purpose- and so something must have caused it. If he knew what, perhaps he could figure out what the problem itself was and, from there, how to fix it. He was a master toy builder afterall- he hated seeking things broken.

Jack breathed out slowly. Well, he might as well tell him. Its not like he could help- he'd see that with the explanation (or what passed for it- it didn't explain anything to him), and, just maybe... talking about it might get a load off his chest. He hated having to dump it on North, but he supposed he was asking to be burdened. He didn't want him to get hurt though. If he felt that he was getting too close, he would slam him out. It would probably tear his heart apart to do so, but he'd do it. Who was he kidding, he did have a heart, he just had to keep it under lock and key- wrapped in dozens of chains, and sealed in a steel box. It would be excruciatingly painful to force North away, if he had to- especially since he'd become the new Sandy to him- but his life was full of inevitable pain. All he could do was endure it when the time came.  
"Well, it was a long time ago. And some parts are really confusing. I don't even understand some myself- then again, nothing new there. I never have understood myself." He started, a slight bitterness in his attempt at sounding casual.

"The first thing I remember is waking up in a frozen lake, under the ice. I got lifted up by some force, that turned out to be the moon, and hovered above the ice." North nodded- this much was usual for when Manny brought a spirit back, but it left him confused. This confirmed that he was, in fact, a good spirit. One saved by the Man in the Moon- like him, like Tooth. So what had happened? Something must have gone wrong. "I stayed there for a little while, but then, the light shut off. I fell down, knocking myself out on the ice." North's eyes widened- Manny stopped in the middle of resurrecting him?! No, he obviously had been fully reborn, but... had Manny finished claiming him? A big piece of the puzzle snapped into place.

"I only half remember what happened after I woke up. I remember that I was angry. Nothing seemed to make me smile." That sounded like the Shadows, North thought- a similar force to Manny, and the same one that created Pitch. "Except when I got my staff, or, well.. It was a scythe when I was done with it... I remember I was excited by the black ice I could create, and the chaos energy at my command. I couldn't wait to test it out, but then, the moon came back." North's ears pricked at this. What could've happened to hold back the moon? But more than that, if the moon managed to somehow reawaken his claim on the boy- and the shadows had claimed him... Oh Manny, this was bad. To have the forces of both light and shadow inside your head... How did they not tear him apart? Any other spirit would be dead or garbling nonsense by now... And yet he'd dealt with it for three hundred years- more than that, so soon after his rebirth, and ever since then. He found himself staring in awe of the boy spirit.

"It was almost like it chased away the darkness... and when I saw the snow again... I felt happy... It was soon after I discovered my powers. My good set, anyway- ice and flying on the wind. I'd already found out about the black ice and chaos, but whilst I was flying I spotted a village... and that was when I found out I was darkness slowly grew back every time I was ignored, and when I finally got walked through..."

He paused, wincing silently. Pain shattering his eyes, as he fought to hide the slight shake that had overcome his limbs.  
"My first breakdown." He said, his voice just barely escaping a tremble. "It's agony like you can't imagine. The good and the bad fighting to decide what to do, with my mind as the battlefield." He'd subconsciously curled himself into a ball, and rocked himself slightly as he spoke. "It.. It was- is- awful... and I can't escape them. They just keep coming, and coming, and... I can't stop them. I can't do anything about it, and they never get any easier. It hasn't hurt any less than that first one- it still tears me apart every time..."

"I've got a little better at maintaining balance- keeping both sides happy. Doing things which are both both and bad, or neither. I've managed almost a full year since my last breakdown... but I still can't escape it... It'll happen sooner or later." He muttered, looking back up at North. "That's why I have to stay away. I can't hurt anyone, and I can't let them hurt me. In the past few hours with you guys- I've not been so conflicted in years! It tears me up being around you- I want to help you, but hurt you at the same time, and it makes me argue... But... its also been the best time of my whole life." He said, a slight smile creeping onto his face.

"Having fun with you all, pranking you. Making you scorn, and laugh, and frown, and smile... I've never been so happy... Ever... But it can't stay that way. I just got lucky this one time, and my luck isn't renowned for holding."  
"So that was why you couldn't help, but you did." North noticed. Jack nodded.  
"The pranks were what let me do it. Literally, I had to hinder you to help you. It was the only way the darkness would let me. I had to compromise... But its not just that. It's like... A set of scales- no, an elastic band- sometimes. The figure listened more intently as he heard this. "I stretch one way, then I'm forced to ping to the other. I can strain against it, but it never works. I can never stop it. If I do something good or bad when in balance, the other gets to do the same. Like when I attacked the Pole, I could be good after... And after what I just did to Pitch... Hopefully this will last a while, but the darkness will come back eventually. It always does." He finished. And that was all Pitch needed to know. He left.

North took this all in. Everything that had happened to the spirit, everything that meant for him... and what he endured as a result of that one day. The breakdowns... and the changes. It was basic science: for every action there was an equal and opposite reaction. Now to figure out why it had happened.  
"When you were reborn?" He asked. He frowned, slightly, in thought.  
"December ninth, three hundred years ago." North roughly threw his mind back to around about that time- hold on... he had a vague memory of something. There'd been a very powerful, magical day on the ninth of December around three centuries ago.

Nine was a magic number- it being three lots of three amplified its magical strength. Three was the number of time- past, present, future- before, during, after- and many other things besides. But, actually, it could also relate to Jack. Good, bad and balance- that was also a three. That couldn't be a coincidence. But what was truly magical about that day was that the ninth coincided with an eclipse. His eyes widened with the realisation. An eclipse... A most auspicious time by any account. It was a powerful, but also dark, event for magic. Especially if it had been a- wait, yes! it must have been! How could he have not noticed the link between the colour of the blood moon and the colour of the demon the boy became under the control of darkness. Not only that, though, if the Earth's shadow blocked the moon before it could finish claiming the young spirit... That was it! This shouldn't have been possible, but under the power of the eclipse, it had been. There was no wonder the boy had so much raw power inside him. He truly was a bomb waiting to go off.

But now he knew how this had happened, he could find a way to help him. Maybe he could reverse the effect of the eclipse, or tap into it somehow? Perhaps use the next eclipse in some way?

"No." Jack's voice brought him out of his deep thoughts. "I can see what you're thinking, North. You want to help me." He said, quietly but clearly. "Don't." North was shocked. He didn't want help? Or was it another one of his confusing "couldn't"s? How could he not help him? He simply had to. No way was he leaving anyone to suffer- especially not Jack. "You can't help me." The winter spirit told him. "For the same reason I can't have a heart... Its too dangerous." North went to protest. He didn't care about dangers, he could take precautions- and besides, it was worth the risk!

"I know you don't care, but I don't want you getting hurt." He turned to look him directly in the eyes now. North had to see how hard this was for him, but that he had to do it... and he had to be certain he'd understood, and would do as he asked. "Please, North. If you care, even a little, about me, you will leave me alone, and you won't try to help. I don't know what I'd do if I hurt you, and I don't want that to happen." North still tried to reason against him. "Please. You'd be making things a lot easier. The best way for you to help is to do nothing. You'd only be doing more harm by causing more breakdowns anyway." He muttered, enduring the pain of pushing him away after he'd been pulled so close. It hurt, but it was a different kind of hurt than he was used to. Heartbreak... And he hated it.

North sighed, breaking his sorrowful, but demanding, gaze.  
"Is this what you want?" He asked.  
"Want." He repeated, a bark of harsh laughter escaping him. "What I want has never mattered in anything! I want to have my sanity- I want, to not be fighting myself all the time! I want to care- and nothing, in the whole world, can give me that! I can never get what I want! Ever. I just do what I can with whatever rotted, sour lemons life can spit out at me!... My life is a living hell- I don't even pretend it to be otherwise... But you'd be making it easier, if you stayed away."

Taken back by the sudden outpour, North found he had no other option. He wanted to help him, but he couldn't exactly force his help upon him. He'd find a way. One way or another. He wouldn't give up on the kid... but he'd abide by his wishes. He'd stay away. At least, until he found a way to help cure him.  
"I promise, as long as you don't want me, I'll stay away." He promised, carefully.

Jack nodded, satisfied. He wouldn't ever want him- the darkness would take care of that when it returned. He still had time, for now, but... for a moment there... he almost... had a friend- no, that was too strong a word.. But he'd nearly cared. He'd come so close to letting someone into his heart... and now he had to seal it off forever.

He took in a deep breath, and let it out.  
"I think that's enough wandering in self pity for one day." He announced, eyes slowly hardening with determination. "I've never mattered to anyone, or anything, but there are millions of kids that do." He stood and jumped off the windowsill, snatching up his staff and twirling it slowly. "I'll help you whilst I can, but once that time's done." He paused, and looked back. "It will have to be goodbye." North accepted this, sadly, before getting and recovering some of his own gusto.  
"It will not be an easy goodbye, my friend." He told him. Jack just discarded the word "friend." It was just a saying- or so he told himself. He daren't look into it any more than that. Besides, he couldn't well up now, he had a job to do.

"Then, let's go save some kids." He said, recovering swiftly with a small smirk on his face. North grinned, almost laughing slightly.  
"Spoken like a Guardian." He commented, and this time Jack really did laugh.

Him? A Guardian? Yeah, why didn't he just fly to the moon and take over the nightmares as well. Guardian, he snickered, now that really cracked him up. He let mirth bubble up within him at the comment, and sighed. Now that would be the day. Jack- the Guardian. He laughed once again.

 **Authors note: (so the thing that changed was the whole blood moon thing- I really wanted to add it but I wasn't sure itd fit but turns out it does! plus for the moon to be blocked it had to be the earths shadow blocking it since the sun can't come in front of the moon ^^ so yes! Blood moon! It's so much more epic and fitting now- massive thanks to guest TGS for pointing this out^^ you made this story better so thank you! Oh and if you dunno what I'm going on about I got the eclipse thing wrong the first time so yeah thanks to them I've managed to get it right^^) .  
**


	13. Chapter 13

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Twelve- Easter

 **Authors note: here we go guys next chapter^^ sorry can't stay long can only post this fast but I hope you enjoy it please review and I wish I could say more but I have to go sorry^^ see you tomorrow!**

Jack wandered towards the globe room. North had gone to convince Bunny to let him help, and he wanted to see how he was doing- maybe see if there was anything he could do to help prove himself.

Loud, angry voices reached his ears long before he saw anything. They finally sharpened into distinct words, as he rounded the last corner.  
"I'm not having That messing with my holiday! We can not trust him, and I do not want him so much as touching my eggs! You've seen him, North- you saw what happened to Pitch! And that's against a fellow dark spirit! How easy do you think he'll go on us?!"  
"Bu-" North attempted to speak.  
"No, North. I don't care what you have to say about that-!" He stopped himself, after a quick, cautionary glance at Tooth. "He's a demon, and a killer, and a psychotic maniac. He's out of control! I will not let him into the Warren- Manny knows what'll happen!" Tooth finally spotted Jack standing to one side, listening to every single word.  
"The bloody demon would sooner murder us all than help us out- I don't think I even need to mention '68. How many people- how many children, North- has that one psycho killed?!" He challenged. North didn't answer. He too had spotted the boy. He looked heartbroken at every scornful word spat at him... but not at all surprised.

The worst part was that he didn't even try to fight back. He didn't try to defend himself, yell at Bunny, punch him, cry, nothing. He just stood there, and took it all... Accepting it... because he knew it was true.

"Now what the bloody hell are you staring a-!" He stopped, as he spun and saw the despirited child they were now all watching. He almost felt guilty at his words, his ears falling back a bit, until he remembered who he was dealing with. A dark silence filled the workshop. Jack said nothing- his expression just as dead as he claimed his soul was. Head bent low so that white locks covered his eyes, slightly.

Slowly, he lowered his staff so that the hook pointed to the floor, and let it drop uselessly to the ground. What was he doing? They all thought, in varying degrees of concern, and anger.  
"You can hit me if you want." He muttered. The voice that came from him held no emotion. It was dead. Defeated.

The Guardians felt as though they'd been hit themselves with those words- all but one, who just stood, stunned, at the offer.  
"I won't blame you." He whispered, seemingly accepting his fate. Bunny was taken back. What was the kid trying to pull?! Suggesting that he might want to..! He might actually..! The silence in the room was suffocating now, as still Jack waited, but no move was made. The world crawled down to a halt.

He'd said some really bad things, hadn't he, Bunny thought, shame and guilt creeping in. All because of that one Easter- and because of something that he had no control over, if North was right. He'd told him that hadn't he? Jack couldn't help it when the darkness took over? He wasn't sure- he'd been in too much of a furious rage, at the very mention of the demon spirit helping with his precious Easter, to even attempt to listen. He'd been a bad bunny. Jack picked up his staff and held it out towards him.  
"You can use this if you like." He offered, blandly. There was no life, or passion, in that voice. How could he have kidded himself into thinking the kid was just fine and dandy? He had no colour, or vibrancy, in his eyes.

Everything the the Guardians stood for, he lacked. He had no memories. Saw no wonder, in a world that was so cruel. Had no dreams, so they couldn't be crushed, or crush him... and as for hope... Bunny hadn't felt a minuscule flicker of it at any point around him. He'd never met someone with such profound hopelessness. He should be trying to help him- not leading him to think that he deserved to be hit like that!... And he didn't even seem to care. He wasn't bothered if he did it.. If anything, he looked like he expected it, but didn't mind. That was what really hit them. Right, cold and hard, in the chest.

Tooth could stand it no longer. She finally and flew towards him, throwing her desperate, loving arms around him, as she drew him close. But the reaction wasn't at all what they were expecting. It looked like he was about to have a heart attack, or seizure! His breath came out in quick, ragged gasps, and his pupils had shrunk to terrified pinpoints. It was like he was having a panic attack! He reeled back, as Tooth let go, shocked and horrified by the reaction.  
"Don't touch me!" He whispered, voice haggard with desperation. "Don't get close to me." He told her, settling down again now she'd backed off. "Just... This was a bad idea. I should have never have offered to help- I'm sorry I even-."

Bunny caught the end of his staff, as he tried to flee. His head whipped back, eyes wide.  
"You're staying here, mate." He told him.  
"Wha-... What?" He muttered, completely overcome with confusion.  
"We need your help with Easter." Bunny told him. His eyes went round and wide as snowballs, as he heard those words, and struggled to accept them. He... he actually wanted him to help?! He didn't hate him?!.. Dare he even begin to think that he might... trust him?! Even in the smallest way, that he won't kill him when his back was turned?! But, he was going to help.. he was going to... to do something good! Something of consequence! Those smiles he'd see on Easter Sunday.. he'd know... he'd know that some of them... were thanks to him. He'd done that. He'd made them smile... and he hadn't needed to do hurt anyone innocent to do it.

He clamped his jaw shut- he didn't want to risk it trembling- and he blinked hard. He couldn't allow himself to dream, so anything remotely good that happened to him seemed surreal. Too good to be true... and this... He felt his heart swell with emotion. That one thing he normally had to keep caged up and squashed in his split life. He couldn't even identify the emotion, but it was such a relief! Such an incredible feeling! He just- he didn't know how to react!

Tooth came up to him, again. This time just taking his hand, but he still pulled it away. Let her think he hated her- it was the easiest way to keep her from getting close. He'd made North promise, but he knew she'd never agree to make such a promise- he had to push her out the hard way. As for Bunny, well, all he had to say was two words "go away" and he was gone. They still didn't like each other very much (as he continually told himself), so it would be relatively easy to break away from him. He had to be careful how much he opened his heart now- he'd have to close it at some point- but, until then, he could care!

He forced some order onto his overwhelming emotions, and nodded at Bunny.  
"Alright then." Bunny turned, smirking at North, who'd also come over at some point. "Buckle up." He smirked, tapping his foot on the ground. North muttered something Russian which probably meant "oh no", and fell into the rabbit hole. Jack, still hovering on the wind from when he'd tried to fly away earlier, had to dive in and follow, but he soon dropped onto the floor. One: the wind doesn't work underground- and two: this whole tunnel thing worked much better as a slide.

He didn't even try to fight the broad grin that spread across his face. He wasn't one for staying moping too long. He whooped as he sped through it- looping 360 degrees around the edge as he balanced on the balls of his feet (just because he could). He eventually saw the end coming, and was hit with momentary confusion. He didn't expect there to be a big, red cushion at the end- oh that's not a cushion- uh oh-! It was lucky he was so good at thinking fast, otherwise he would've landed flat on North, and winded the big guy. But, as it was, he managed to pole vault over him with his staff. Nice recovery.

North, who'd apparently had a miniature heart attack trying to get out of the way of the winter spirit, sagged down in relief.  
"The buckle up." He muttered. "Was very funny." He said, sarcastically. Bunny laughed.  
"Welcome to the Warren." He announced, but Jack had already wandered off. Well, new discovery, he was naturally impatient- it wasn't just the darkness making him restless. He wandered towards to a strange bunch of flowers he'd spotted. It was like one of those fast forwarded nature videos, and they seemed to be producing some kind of fruit?  
"And... he's gone." He heard Bunny's mildly irritated comment behind him, but couldn't care less.

He watched as the strange fruit sprouted legs, and started wandering about the place- wait. That wasn't fruit- they were eggs. Okay, magical egg plants. Why not? The eggs used their new, tiny legs to wander past a row of different strange plants. These ones were like multicoloured snowdrops, and spewed different clouds of coloured stuff at the eggs as they walked past. Although, one unlucky one passed the assault course without getting hit by a single one.

He smiled, and rolled his eyes. There was always one, wasn't there. He nudged it back into the path of the paint plants (he had no idea if that was what they were called, but it was catchy), even though it left his staff rainbow coloured afterwards. He chuckled at the pretty, little stick, and followed his egg towards some kind of river. You know what, he was calling him Eggward (original, right). He waltzed off towards the river, and jumped straight in with a little plop. He watched him somehow paddle across, despite his teeny legs, and- hold up! Another egg was struggling, unable to cross the river- mostly because its kicking legs were flailing in the air. He gave it a little helping hand. Gently pushing it towards the bank, where it found its feet, and went to join Eggward. This one was Shelly.

From then, he went on to the pattern trees, where he helped untangle Eg Egg 'n' Eggie (triplets, since they looked a lot alike) from a vine thing. It seemed that quite a few of them got caught in those- and, yes, he got sentimental over sand and eggs. Deal with it. It wasn't like he could get close to people- they hurt far too much when they broke.

He let his eyes follow his five egg troopers to see what stage was next, but that appeared to be the end of the line. The eggs walked off to join a huge queue of their buddies that stretched endlessly ahead, until it split into seven and disappeared into an array of tunnels that lined the wall. He watched them just carry on walking, straight into the tunnels- softly shepherding a loose egg that had started to wander back into the crowd (Dieggo).

Then, he looked behind him, and his eyes widened. He whistled- that's a whole lot of eggs, he thought, looking back at the hatchery hill (or whatever it was), to see hundreds more tiny shapes bobbing their way along through the various beautification routes. The place where he was standing gave him an incredible view. He could almost the whole heart of the warren from here, and it was truly amazing. There was such a vibrant array of colours everywhere- in the eggs, the trees, the assortment of plants that adorned the place.

He felt a content smile spread along his lips as he watched... Not bad, he thought... This place really was incredible... It was so peaceful, so full of vibrancy, and life... Everything he wished he could have.

He panned his gaze around the whole area, and saw Tooth guiding a bunch of eggs to the river. North was detangling a few from the pattern trees (a lame name next to his others, but he couldn't think of anything better), and Bunny was picking up a few and hand painting them himself. They were much more stunning than the other eggs, obviously for very special kids.

He looked back up at the hill, and his eyes widened again. He chuckled, softly to himself. It looks like he ahead a lot of helping out ahead of him. It seemed like thousands of sggs were now wandering about the place (as opposed to the hundreds it started with when he arrived). He grinned, unable to remember the last time he'd been so happy (as it had probably been never). He better get started. He leapfrogged across the rocks to reach the river again- one of them was in the need of armbands. Should he name this one Kaylegg or Aleggsander?

The swirly depths of the glossy liquid in the river wasn't reflective in the slightest, aside from a glitter that speckled it, but had it been, Jack would've been a lot more worried. The mirror would've revealed the tiny dot of crimson colouring the corner of the back of his head, secretly hiding.

Darkness was patient. Darkness could wait. It was sneaky, subtle. It waited for the perfect moment.

Jack continued helping out the Guardians with Easter, unaware that every second he spent there was slowly sealing their doom.


	14. Chapter 14

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Thirteen- Shadows

 **Authors note: figured out Pitchs plan? Time to find out dun dun dun... Let me know what you think of the chapter and Ill be back tommorow with the next one^^**

It was as quick as a light going out. One moment he was flying, the next he was enveloped in the shadow cast by a low hanging cloud.

He'd left the Guardians, not even alerting them to his leaving, having felt a prick of darkness return- and had now returned to balance. But the darkness kept annoying him. It kept scraping at the edge of his mind, trying to gain purchase on it like a constant mental itch. It confused, and slightly worried, him. Both sides'd had their turn. He should be back at balance- the darkness should be content with its half, but it wasn't.

He wasn't paying much attention to where he was flying, when he vanished into the shadow. The sensation was one of nothingness. Whilst the portal from the snowglobe had overwhelmed him with colour, speed and a unique buzz, the travel through shadows was a very deadening experience. It was as though everything ceased to exist. No floor, no sky, no wind, no orientation. He couldn't tell which way was which- direction ceased to matter. It was almost like he was falling, except there was no tug of gravity. He wouldve been completely unsettled by it, if the dark side of him mind hadn't been so calm.

He knew what was going on... somehow. It was a little known fact that all shadows are made up of the same darkness. Some people, like Pitch, who controlled them, could use this connection as a passageway to go almost anywhere... or pull others through.

The world resumed around him, as a floor solidified under his feet. He felt stale, dead air against his skin. He was in some place he'd never seen before, but... it felt, somewhat... homely? No, that was definately not the right word, but it felt as though he was meant to be here- to half his mind, at least. The other expressed a definite lack of comfort about the place, but he was curious as to where, or what, this place it was and what he was doing here. Although, it was getting harder and harder for him to think- that constant mental itch was really growing incredibly distracting!

"What do you want, Pitch?" He called out to nothingness. He was still the shadow limbo, or else he would've addressed him directly. A low chuckle emanated from every dark point in the place- which was to say everywhere. A nerve twitched in his jaw as the darkness in his mind briefly spiked past its usual half, before he got it under control. What was going on? He could just about keep the shadows under control enough to listen to Pitch's words.  
"I just thought I'd see how you were. How are you, Jack?" He asked, smoothly melting out of the shadows a good distance away on his right.

The nerve next to his eye was quivering uncontrollably now, but it barely noticeable from the outside- inside, though, more and more arrows of darkness were attempting to break through the peace in his mind.  
"What's it to you how I am?" He snapped, the throbbing, incessant pulsing in his head sending him beyond all niceties- especially since it was Pitch, and especially with the burning flame of anger slowly growing within him.  
"Oh? I thought we were friends, Jack?" He said in mock sorrow, transporting from the distant ledge to the same one Jack stood on- much closer than his liking. "Are we not?" He asked, falsely innocent.

Jack growled in effort, as the darkness threw itself like a battering ram at the rest of his mind.. and slowly it was gaining ground on him, however hard he tried to hold it back. He shook his head quickly, as though tried to shake the darkness out.  
"Stop it!" He shouted, but not at Pitch. His teeth bared in a pained snarl. What was going on? He should be balanced! He'd been light, he'd been dark- why wasn't he back to normal?! What the Nightmares was happening?! He noted the dark curse, started to panic. This was not good.

Red pulsed amongst the blue of his eye, and crept across his scalp.  
"Get back! You've had your turn!" He screamed out loud, but the darkness didn't abate, and continued to relentlessly throw itself further and further into his mind. He pressed his fingers, like knarled roots, into his skull. It was like a moment in a sword duel when the blades of the opponents lock, and they push with all their strength against each other... And the black was slowly overcoming him. He had to force himself to breath, as he seemed to have forgotten how to do it on instinct. There was no room for emotion so will power consuming was the fight to hold back the darkness. It was crippling! It wasn't pain, as such, but the unbearable pressure of the force attacking his mind shattered him. Thoughts were barely possible. It was all he could do to try and maintain his weak, feeble resistance. But he was failing. Why?! He should be balanced!

He flinched, and whimpered, as yet more of his defense was ruthlessly destroyed. He pushed back against the shadows like he was holding up a huge weight, but he wasn't strong enough. He was gasping horribly- little things like breathing didnt matter when your very mind was getting crushed.  
"That's where your wrong." Pitch's words barely reached him. _-What?_ He thought, choking out the thought like a word from a crushed windpipe. "The darkness came back a long time ago." The sudden realisation shocked him. He felt like he'd been punched. What remained of him that wasn't lost in the battle to keep back the darkness was stunned with horror- it had been there the whole time!... But somehow he'd known it was there all along... It rattled his very core- how he only realised that now?! How could he have been so blind?!

He was terrified now. Little remained that wasn't under the thrall of darkness. "You've over extended yourself." The words were getting less distinct, but another hard blow stuck him. All the time he'd been doing something good, he'd been in balance... but that meant-! Shadow claws! The dark was having its time! And he couldn't hold it back- no! No... what was he going to-. The transition was now almost complete, as he went from pilot to passenger- no longer able to control anything, though a microscopic amount of light still remained.

He snarled viscously at the shadow man in front of him- a sinister, twisted grin forming around his bared teeth, as he reached a realisation.  
"I'll just fight you, old man." He snarled, convulsions wracking his whole body, and chest. He hated Pitch with every fibre of his being. He'd gone against him before- he could do it again now. His plan had backfired. He was dead meat. But, the satisfaction of victory was short lived.

Pitch bent down to the hunched over spirit, lifting his head up to face him with a single finger.  
"Oh really?" He said, the words sounded like they were coming through deep water. "But it won't be me you're fighting." Jack's eyes snapped a little wider at this, as dread took over him. What did he mean by- no... His failing mind beat feebly back against the darkness, as a horrible suspicion gripped him. No, no- I can't- no!

The shadows covering the cavern engulfed him. Pitch disappeared, as he was transported through the darkness.

No! He was going to take him to-! He strained and pushed against the darkness of his mind with desperation born only of one about to lose everything. _No! Nooo!_ If he had any control over his body, whatsoever, he'd be crying and screaming right now. He'd never fought so hard against the darkness in all his life. _He couldn't- no!..._ Because, it wasn't his sake he was fighting for... But even his desperation driven strength wasn't enough. _Please... no..._ he felt himself slipping under.

The last thing he felt was the world resuming again, and a voice, distant and barely audible.  
"Jack? What're doing over here, mate?"

 _No..._

Tears should've fallen with that final, broken plea, but he was swamped by the ocean of shadows.

The world went black, and the darkness ruled all.

Finally. He had complete control. The goody two shoes side had been annoyingly hard to subdue this time, but, no matter, it was time for some fun. He turned to face the rabbit behind him, a malicious grin on his face. That rabbit was an enemy. One of the Guardians- but also, the one who'd insulted him so. He was going to pay for every word.

He watched him shrink back- shock and fear in his eyes, as his ears fell back. He was afraid... He relished the thought, and laughed. He was going to have so much fun with this beastly big Bunny. He took a step towards him, swinging his scythe like a pendulum in front of him, as he strode closer and closer to the rabbit who backed away in fear. The sensation of his terror growing was just delicious.

With a quick movement, he saw him reach into the holsters that held the oh so terrifying bits of stick. He'd barely flinched his paws, when the demon released his fury. He whipped the scythe round, cutting through the air in a blood red arc. A shock wave of red energy shot out from the blade, striking the rabbit before he could even touch his pathetic twigs. It knocked him clear out of the tunnel, back into the open warren. The two other Guardians looked over as he hit the floor... and there... emerging from the shadows... the very one they recently called friend.

Demon, crimson eyes glowing. A sick snarl of a smirk disfiguring his face.

They were all struck by fear- not just of their former friend, but the thought of what he would do... and what they might have to do to stop him. They didn't want to fight him, and definately not hurt him, but it didn't look like they had a choice... and they hated that they were left with no alternative. It was enough to shake the most hardened of warriors- the sight of a possessed friend coming to kill them.

Imagine a best friend coming at you, with a knife, intent on murder... Its hard to imagine, but that was the reality the Guardians faced.

But just when they thought they saw the worst of the situation, the stakes suddenly rose incredibly. A fragile crack sounded from beneath the dark spirit. He looked down, dispassionately, and saw a broken egg- bits of shell, scattered around his foot. The dark grin on his face grew considerably. The Guardians had just enough time for complete dread to hit them. The eggs. He was going to go for the eggs! No- Easter was reliant on those eggs! The kids... if there weren't any eggs for them to collect... Well, Tooth knew best of all what would happen. They couldn't let that happen. With Pitch on the rise, they couldn't let such a fatal blow to belief be dealt. They shivered to even think what that might cause... and so it was that when the spirit of darkness lifted his scythe high above his head, ready to swing down, they were frozen with horror. This is going to be fun, the red demon thought.

North managed to snap out of it.  
"Jack." He said, calmly- beseechingly. There was no response from the dark beast. "You don't want to do this." He edged forwards slightly.

Aww, trying to appeal to his sense of goodness is he? Win him over with the power of heart? Stupid, fat, bearded man- didn't the moon side tell him? He didn't have a heart.

With a echoing, deafening boom, he slammed the end of the scythe into the floor.

An obliterating tidal wave of red chaos flew across the ground.


	15. Chapter 15

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Fourteen- What have I Done ?

 **Authors note: back with more.. I apologise in advance for these next few chapters... They're pretty, well... You'll see ... Anyways please leave a review as always and I'll be back tommorow with more**

His breath was quick and deep. His heart beating beating like a drumroll, the remains of adrenaline just seeping from his veins. A slight exhaustion weighed down his limbs.

What... Where was-?... What... Where-... He returned to himself. The darkness had had its time, but he was terrified to see what he'd done whilst he blacked out. As he came back to himself, he took in what he could. Sharp, broken shells pressed into his feet. A dark, foreboding dread filled him, as he blinked... and saw the scene in front of him.

He froze, eyes wide in pure terror. He felt his entire being crumble. The Guardians lay destroyed at his feet- alive, but broken. North looked like he'd just stopped in the middle of a desperate charge, Tooth lay crumpled on the ground. She was cut in many places- it looked like one of her wings were broken. North was slouched, one leg trailing behind him. But worst done was Bunny. He wasn't with the other two. He was right at his feet, staring up at him with pure, unrestrained horror... and at something he was holding high above his head. What was in his... his staff? It was always his staff, but... He felt the breath choke in his throat, as he pictured a scythe blade taking the place of the pointed crook. The angle and poise of the blade... about to swing down and deliver a fatal blow. Not even an immortal would've survived it. He'd been about to.. to...

His core- his very essence- snapped like a thick branch. Or half of it did, anyway, the other half felt proud, and that was the most sickening part. He'd beaten, hurt and destroyed the Guardians- about to kill one of them-... and a part of him enjoyed it. Felt pleased with what he'd done- and, more than that, urged him to finish the job. He shook uncontrollably, as horror seeped into more and more of his mind. But their eyes... their eyes! They burned into him. Terrified, accusing, horrified and hurt. He hated it- he absolutely hated it! He wanted the accusation to go! Why wouldn't the guilt stop?! The sickness calm! He felt truly sick. He'd done this. What kind of monster was he?! And not only that, he'd enjoyed it!... and was proud of it.

He'd never hated himself more. He was terrified of himself- sickened by the beast he'd become. He shuffled back, thoughtlessly. Why.. Why?! Finish him. Go on, get him. He's right at your knees- take him. No, run! What are you doing you idiot?! You're a monster! Run before you hurt them again! Get them! Now's your chance. Don't hurt them! Ha- why not? It was fun. No- that was horrible! Run! Finish them!

.. No... Shadow lights, no... No, no, no... He felt the burning dagger of pain stab into his brain. No- not a breakdown- no, please! No- anything but that! He bent double in agony, as his skull felt like he was getting torn in half.  
"Jack!" North's voice jarred him slightly out of the torture. He's coming- coming to get revenge- give punishment- no- run! He finally reached an agreement, just as North reached him. So lost in his breakdown of sanity, he didn't see the concern and worry in North's eyes.

North watched him leave, fearful for the young spirit. Just then his hair had both red and white at the same time. The colour changing from root to tip, with an unnatural movement that made it seem to almost writhe on his head. He remembered the indescribable pain he saw in the boy's eyes, which had been swarmed with both blue and red. A breakdown. He was having a breakdown... and in his current mental state, after what he'd just seen, and done... this time, he really might snap...

He stared off down the tunnel he vanished through, desperately worried for that poor, broken child.

Get away- get away! You monster! Ha hahaha, he'll never get us. Monster! Yes, you are. No! Stop it! He was just flying- he didn't know where. The battle threatening to resume hell was enough to make him fly to the ends of the earth. I need to be alone- that's no fun, lets destroy a village like '68- no, alone, I don't want anyone getting hurt! The demonic laughter coming from the darkness terrified him. Because it was his laughter! It was inside him! There was no escaping it! Make it stop! make it go away!

The splitting pain started to descend again, and he fell. No, no, no! He didn't even register hitting the ground- that pain was nothing. He could feel it coming- it was coming! The impending battle. No... no... His breath came in quick sobs. No.. please!...  
"Have fun, Jack?"

 **YOU!**

The word burned with pure fury in his mind, obliterating all else. Just blazing, all consuming anger. All his emotions, all the turmoil- the hate, the grief, the stress, the horror- it all merged into a single, vast torrent of fury. He screamed, as he released it all, in a sea of crimson that erupted from his staff like a nuclear bomb, concentrated onto that one hated figure. Pitch vanished into the shadows, as the ocean of chaos energy reached him. Jack didn't even register the avalanche he caused, as half a mountain crumbled in the distance. He didn't even see it. He saw red- and all he registered, was Pitch. He snarled unrestrictedly, like an inhuman beast, as he saw Pitch's escape. Then he flew round as, he felt his prey return. Another shout of pure fury unleashed at him as huge spikes of dark ice thrust from the ground. As thick as ancient tree trunks, and tipped with razor points, shooting at the speed of sound towards him. He vanished again.

The beast roared with fury, at having his prey escape again, and leapt into a sphere of chaos energy. WHERE WAS HE?! WHERE?! His eyes ravaged the ragged, icy landscape- THERE! He saw the tiny, black speck below him, and threw himself, with a primal cry, at the tiny figure. Every last ounce of dark energy flowing through his veins- every drop of power- to be unleashed in this attack. He slammed his scythe into the ground with seismic force, splitting the entire ice field to forge a deep, black crevice at the base of a mountain.

The dust cleared, revealing a single figure knelt at the edge of the crevice. He panted heavily, still snarling with anger, as he beheld his work. A crack five times as wide as he was tall, and many times that in depth. His chest heaved in and out, as he stared at it. Had he done it?! Did he get him?!  
"That's better, isn't it?" He heard the voice behind him, and his face disfigured with fury once more. He shot out a blast of ice, weak in comparison to the previous attacks, but still powerful.

"Now, there's no need for that." He heard Pitch chastising from the shadows. He felt him emerge, and prepared himself for another attack, but the words that followed stopped him. Stunning him with pure disbelief, and shock.  
"I just saved you from that breakdown."


	16. Chapter 16

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Fifteen- Alliance?

 **Authors note: ugh I'm pooped. Just been to a concert and it was great! Really awesome... But I could've done without the two hour travel (four hours since its there and back) phew I'm off to bed but here's the chapter as always let me know what to think and I'll be back tomorrow^^**

He.. he what? The words slowly filtered through his brain. Pitch... save him?... What-? And then he realised- the darkness was gone. Spent up in the attack on the Boogeyman. He couldn't feel it in his mind, anymore. Gone. And if he was in any doubt, the blast of ice he recently threw at him confirmed it. It was clear. It wasn't the black ice of the shadows.

He blinked at his saviour- no, he refused to consider him that, but- ho-? What? Why? Confusion ruled over him almost as much as shock and disbelief. But, through the confusion, he brought together a question, and remembered who he was dealing with. Pitch's words were as slippery as oil- and just as dark and lacking in substance. Yes, he had saved him. But obviously not for no purpose. He must want something.

He changed his expression of blank disbelief into one of shrewd suspicion.  
"Why?" He said, his distrust clear. Pitch looked a little taken back by this, even hurt, but he didn't know if he bought it.  
"Do you think I enjoy seeing you in pain?" He told him. He considered this.

Pitch was a dark spirit, through and through, and he knew the darkness- a decent part of it was revelling in fear and pain. Why was he making out like he didn't enjoy his pain? He'd laughed at Sandy's as he destroyed him so what was so special about him? What did Pitch care about him? Wait... if he was part darkness himself... what did Pitch consider him? An ally?... Friend?! Ludicrous though it was, he wasn't sure.

Pitch saw his narrowed eyes, and knew he didn't buy it. He sighed, sadly.  
"I knew you'd be like this... But you, of all people, know what it's like to live with the shadows." He said, leaving Jack stunned. What? He-?... Pitch struggled with the darkness too? Was he forced by its hand? Did he have as little control as he did? Was he really... like him? Did he... did he understand him? He was stunned by the possibility. All his life he'd been alone, and struggling with the shadows... and now he found out someone might understand his pain- even share it. He didn't know what to think.

As he took that in, Pitch continued.  
"All my years in the shadows I thought, no one else understands- no one knows what this feels like." Jack couldn't help but notice how those words might just as easily have come from his own lips. "But now I know I was wrong." He muttered, looking him straight in the eye. There was genuine relief there, and even the beginnings of... of... companionship?! He found it hard to belief, but the evidence was staring at him right there... Then again, could he trust the dark spirit's eyes anymore than the rest of him? He wasn't sure, but the possibilty of companionship threw him. Because that was the offer he was making, through his eyes and his words.

Having someone who cared about, and looked out for, him... It was somewhat of a distant dream he never allowed himself to have... and then he remembered why he couldn't have it, and hardened himself. Foolish for even letting himself dream in the first place.  
"Well, whether or not we understand each other, don't think I'm going to be your ally, Pitch." He warned him, Pitch looked pained by his words. "I'm just as much a danger to you as the Guardians- and you're just as much a danger to me." He told the dark spirit, turning away from him.

"But that's where you're wrong." He heard the words, and paused in place. Curiousity pulling him back. "The darkness won't attack me. Not now we're even. Surely you felt that connection before now." He wondered. Jack thought... Yes, he did remember how the darkness insisted he was an ally, before he had a reason to go against him... Another realisation hit him...

That meant... Pitch was the only person, in the world, the darkness wouldn't want to obliterate on sight... and neither would the light want to attack him... He... he could stay around him... and he wouldn't endanger him, or himself. The very foundations of his entire world shook. Peace... Companionship... He could have that with Pitch. With him he wouldn't ever argue, or be by himself, anymore.. He needn't be alone... He wouldn't have to battle... Even the idea of it... It was more than he ever allowed himself to fantasise. Let alone that he might actually...

Real company... not being alone... He just- there was no way. He just couldn't accept it... But there it was. That impossible wish. His for the taking.  
"All I ask..." Pitch said from behind him. "Is a little show of loyalty." He said. A show of what?

Suddenly, a different voice cried out from behind him.  
"Argh! Let me go!" He knew that voice. He whipped round. A small rabbit was held scruffed in Pitch's hand. It was grey, but even without the tribal markings around its fur, he knew who it was. The loss of Easter had took an incredible toll on him- he was small and weak... but it was still him.  
"Bunny?" He barely even whispered the word. The poor rabbit stopped in his fight to get out of Pitch's hand, as his ears picked up the sound. He saw him. There was surpressed fear in his eyes. What was Pitch doing with...? His eyes suddenly widened with the realisation of what he wanted him to do... A show of loyalty... He wanted him to-.  
"Finish him." Pitch said, calmly.

What?.. No! "He's losing belief... He'll be gone soon anyway. You'd be doing him a favour." A favour?! Killing him! Perhaps, that would make him suffer less, but... but it was wrong! He couldn't. But since had he ever cared what was right or wrong? When had that ever mattered?! "Do that, and you can stay with me forever."... So this was the choice he faced. Everything he'd never dared dream... or sparing the life of the fading Guardian.

He was terrified he was even considering it! It would make him suffer less... and he, Jack, might finally... be happy... Forever... In all his life- after all the hardships, and endless struggles, and sorrows!... He might finally find happiness... It wasn't as if he liked Bunny that much anyway... He'd said some truly terrible things to him. He remember his hurtful words at the pole, and his grip on his staff tightened... He'd hurt him... Was it not only right for him to do the same?

But then he saw the rabbit's eyes. He was terrified- desperate to live- but more than that, laced behind the fear... was guilt. "I'm sorry" he was saying- "I'm so sorry for everything I said to you." It was like he wanted to make amends... If those were going to be his final words, he wanted to let Jack know he was sorry- and he was wrong about him.

Then, the spell was broken.

Just what was Pitch asking him to do? Kill him?! Just what kind of person did that?! What kind of company would he be anyway? How alike were they really? He restrained the darkness- could Pitch claim that much? He fed off fear, and even if the darkness forced him to do everything- you act like a monster long enough... thats what you became. He was desperate, but he wasn't stupid. That life he'd been offered wasn't a dream. He knew what would his life be like around Pitch- he'd be spreading fear. Bringing upset and misery to people's lives. That wouldn't end his arguing! The darkness might be okay with that, but this part of him- right now... he wasn't bad. He didn't want to be feared. Wasn't that the whole reason for his day to day struggle? (For this side at least- the darkness struggled for the opposite).

No- he wasn't going to hurt Bunny. Not even if he had to endure this hell for all eternity. He just wouldn't do it.

He threw his staff aside. He wanted there to be no mistake about his choice- and both of those watching looked completely stunned by his decision.  
"No." He said, determinedly, turning away from Pitch, and walking away. He'd come back for his staff later, and go find some rural village far from this fight of good and bad. He might not be Pitch's ally, but he wasn't the Guardian's either. He couldn't be. He was a neutral party. Alway had been, always would-. He was interrupted from his thought, as a blast of darkness hit him square in the back.

It hit him hard and carried him ahead into face of a nearby mountain. All the breath knocked out of him, and dizzy with pain, spiralling towards unconsciousness, he could do nothing as he fell down into the very same crevice he'd created for Pitch. He hit the ground, hard. He barely even saw noticed the other smaller blur falling with him...

He came out of his unconsciousness quickly, and saw the small bunny across just across from him doing the same... They just sat there for a while... Jack wasn't willing to say anything. He was too lost in deep, dark, depressed thoughts... and all too aware of the slowly growing patch of darkness in the back of his mind. Be balanced, he reminded himself- don't hurt him... Don't hurt him...

They both remained silent... Until Bunny finally spoke up.  
One-  
single-  
word.

"...Why?"

And that finally did it. Finally broke him. That deadly word of destruction and madness. It cleaved through his mind, as the darkness rose with an uproar. Why?! Why?! It pounded in his brain. Stupid! Idiot! Imbecile! The darkness raged at him for his choice to save the rabbit, as the light shot back: You demon! Monster! Beast! For everything the dark had ever done.

It tore his mind in two. Red washed out everything, as lost all connection with the world- seeing nothing, feeling nothing, but the pure, soul destroying agony. It obliterated every single cell he possessed. He heard a shout of unimaginable pain laced with equal measures of fury and sorrow- innocent and demonic at the same time- but predominantly filled with pain. He recognised it his own, but he didn't care in the slightest. All he could think about was the pain, that took control of every aspect of his mind and tore it into oblivion. Pain so complete a sword to the heart felt dull in comparison.

This was the reason he strove so hard to keep peace and balance. It utterly destroyed him. He'd finally been pushed beyond the point of no return. He was having a breakdown.


	17. Chapter 17

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Sixteen- True Self

 **Authors note: so here we are... Don't know what else to say... I promise I'm not a psycho or a mean person I just have a good imagination and... Well just let me know what you think and I'll be back tommorow with the next one...**

The torrent of pain exploded through his mind for an unknown stretch of eternity. He couldn't bear it. The pain! The pure complete agony as the darkness and light ripped apart his mind in an effort to control it. It ripped. It tore. It burned. Chopped, cut shredded, crushed, destroyed, obliterated and every other imaginable thing that could cause pain- a breakdown was that. It was pain itself. Purely and completely. There was no other way to describe it. Ceaseless havoc wrecked upon every last part of him, so that not a single bit was spared. His mind... heart... soul... brain... being... even his body couldn't escape the torment, as his throat burned from the screams that tore endlessly from his agony crippled body. The cries as unstoppable as the pain that ruined his every grain of a second spent in the crushing fist of pain. Unstoppable, like the streams of moisture that fell shamelessly down his face. It would go on like this until he could destroy himself no more. Until both sides burnt themselves out and he was left with nothing but miniscule fragments of himself... But he just couldn't take it any more! Not another second! Not another long, eternity stretching moment, drawn and stretched by the claws of pain that raked through him. He just wanted it to be over- MAKE IT END! He screamed, louder than his previous throat tearers more savage and without regard to the destruction or damage it sliced into him he swung out blindly with his fist and his cry shook the ice.

A blinding flash of red, and an earth crunching boom sounded for miles. The noise deafening, as his fist made contact with the ice rock wall of the crevice, and obliterated it. It completely broke apart, much like the spirit that caused it, and fell into a massive pile of rubble. A steady, ragged slope of rock leading to the surface. But as the final clacking of the ice settling stopped, and the dust cleared... there was no movement from within.

Jack was weak... so weak... from pain... The screams... The useless attempts to regain peace... That final outburst took the last of his minuscule will. He couldn't even hold himself up. Slowly, he sank down to the ground... Every breath a struggle to get the strength to work his lungs. He was so utterly spent... He couldn't even think through the haze of exhaustion, and recently relieved pain, surrounding his brain. His throat was raw and ragged from his screams. His hand filled with throbbing pain where he hit it against the wall. His face stiff and cracked with dozens of frozen tears... and his head still pulsed with a throbbing headache, as he lay there, somewhere in the limbo between consciousness and slipping into black...

He was close to fading into that forever black... but that would be the easy option. He didn't get the release through peaceful dark. He never did. He forever endured, the forever hell.

He didn't know how long he'd been lying there. when he felt a gentle, reluctant nudge on his shoulder.  
"... Jack?" He heard the voice, but it was so distant... So far away... But, then, so was the peaceful black... He couldn't go there however much he wished. To continue hoping for that was futile. He gave up. Forced himself back into the land of reality. He just barely got some feeling back into his limbs. Of course that only served to fill his mind with endless, nagging screams of pain from every inch of his body, but he ignored it... or endured, and with great effort, he managed to get his eyes to focus. It wasn't a hand that had nudged him. It was a paw. He saw a small rabbit looking at him. Worry and concern in his eyes, but he was clearly horrified, terrified and shocked by what he'd just seen.

He blinked, crusted bits of ice scraping against each other, and forced his limbs into action. Pushing himself with painful slowness, until he was propped up against a huge boulder, and even then the effort from that left him panting. The bunny stayed where it was- still looking up at him with quiet, horrified awe.  
"What... What happened?" He asked, delicately. Jack slowly drew his legs up closer to him, ignoring the strong urge to wince, and held them close. Using them to hide his face slightly, so that only his all white hair was now visible. The rest hidden by shadow, or blocked by his arms and his legs.

"It was a breakdown." He whispered, in a voice that was almost painful to hear. Rough. Rasping. Sore. But he didn't care about the pain, and he didn't care how he sounded. He cared about close to nothing right now. "When the light and the dark start fighting... sometimes it turns into an all out war." He muttered, not a hint of life in his words. They were just empty, devoid of any emotion... and that hollowness made it harder to hear than the grinding of it. Bunny just stared.  
"How long..." He began.  
"My whole life." He said, blankly. "The first one when I was just barely ten or twenty minutes old."

Bunny looked at the open ramp out of the crevice. He was free to leave- the escape was there for the taking. But what kind of Guardian would he be if he left a child like this. He looked back at the broken winter spirit. Broken was the right word.

You could drop a vase and glue it back together, but the result was a weak, cracked and feeble structure that never looked right, often with gaping holes in it and jagged parts of it poking out, making it dangerous. So weak it would break again at a single touch. It was just how Jack looked right now. Just as fragile as a recently pieced together glass vase, but, more than that, he was just so... dead. He'd heard people say they felt like death before, but he knew the spirit in front of him was much closer to that feeling than any of them had ever been. His eyes really were that of a dead man- so lacking in lustre or life. He doubted they were even seeing what was in front of him. But what truly hit him was how much he'd given up. He'd never had any hope to begin with, and yet, somehow, he felt even more desolate than he'd ever seen him.

"Jack, mate. What's-?" He started.  
"Don't do that- don't speak to me like that. I'm not your mate- I'm a monster! You're just like North- thinking you can help me- thinking you can fill my head with false hopes! You want to get close. You want to find out what's wrong, you want to help- but you just can't get it into your stupid heads! You just make it worse! And then its you that has to deal with the consequences, and- I just- I can't stand it! Why did you have to go and get close? Why did you have to make me care?! I was fine just living as a useless nothing- then you guys just come into my life. You make me care about you, and you make me help, and then I destroy you all- because that's the monster I am! There's only one person I don't want to send into oblivion, and thats a fear spreading, evil lunatic! He tries to talk me into joining him. He offers to give me peace- he makes me think that I might be able to stop fighting, but its all just a lie! Because I'll just have to keep fighting- and fighting- and fighting, because the darkness just keeps coming, and coming- and there's no escape from it! It keeps trying to make me into a monster, but- I don't want to be bad!" He screamed, and then he gasped as he came to that realisation... He didn't want to be bad... He didn't like the way the darkness took over, and forced him to do its dirty work...

He could never allow himself to even consider what he wanted, because he could never get it- and even just thinking about it messed up the feeble balance he kept up through his everyday life...so the revelation truly stunned him. He could never understand himself, because it just caused a breakdown to think about himself.

"I don't want to hurt anybody..." He whispered in a daze, as he realised more. "I... I do care about you guys, and I want... more than anything, to be able to be with you, but... it can't ever be that way... I want your help, but I can't let you. I want the breakdowns to end... but I want to keep you guys safe even more, and it... hurts. It rips my heart in two just to be around you... because its just a taste of what can never be... and just that feeling... It makes me wish I just didn't care at all." He muttered. He'd never thought so much about himself... and he was stunned by the knowledge. Figuring out what made someone up was a huge achievement in itself, but when its about yourself, and you'd been so confused and clueless before... It really was just astonishing. It both rocked and settled the foundations of your life at the same time. That huge emotional outpour was a culmination of everything he ever felt, but never understood. It had built up for so long, and now he finally released it. And from it , he could gathered the little tiny bits that let him piece together what he was... and it didn't look like he was the monster he thought he was.

"You mean you've you've only just realised that?" Bunny muttered, and Jack blinked, astonished. What? He'd... he'd known?... He'd understood that- he'd understood him?! How? He couldn't even manage it himself after three hundred years. "I only had to look at you when you were at the Warren to know you were good." He said. Good. Him. Once again he was thrown into doubt with the words. North has said the exact same thing... But he wasn't. He'd said it many times before- what he wanted, didnt matter... because of what he was. He didn't like it, but he was still half dark... And besides, the only way he was even thinking like this right now was because this was the moon side talking.

How was he supposed to know what was truly him?! Was this even his thoughts, or just the light?! What was he?! He'd never been so desperate to know. Was he good or bad? Light or dark? Overland or Frost? He was tired of being split all the time! He couldn't be both- what was the real him! What did he really think?! Was any part of his mind even his?!

He didn't even realise it, but as those thoughts had been going through his head, he'd been murmuring snatches of them. Most people wouldn't have been able to hear them, but rabbits had very sensitive ears. He caught every word.  
"No 'm not... doesn' matter.. still dark. Just light now... this even me? What 's me? Good.. bad? Overland.. Frost?" Bunny's ears pricked right up at that. What did he just say?

"Overland Frost?" He repeated, confused and stunned by those words. Jack came out of his thoughts, and looked at him for the first time in a long time. He'd been so deep in the complex labyrinth of his own mind, he didn't even know what he was saying.  
"What?" He muttered.  
"Just then, you said 'Overland Frost'". Bunny told him. Jack's eyes lowered a little.  
"Yeah, just the mystery of my name. When I was reborn, I woke up under the darkness with the name Jack Overland. But then the moon appeared, and told me I was Jack Frost, and even just choosing a name would send me into a breakdown, so I just started calling myself just Jack." He explained. He saw the wide, shocked with realisation eyes of the rabbit, and his eyes narrowed in confusion. What was the big deal about his lack of a name?

"Its just..." Bunny began. "A long time ago- around three hundred years-... there was a kid named Jackson Overland Frost." He told him. Jack's breath hitched in his throat as he said that, and he lost his ability to breath. "That kid, well... we don't normally remember a kid from that long ago, but the way he died, it... it was impossible to forget." He paused, knowing this was going to be a big deal to the spirit in front of him, who clearly still doubted he was good inside. "He died protecting his sister." He told him.

And there it was. That stunned expression. Jack might as well have been frozen in time.  
"He saved her from a frozen lake when the ice was too thin, but in doing so... he fell in himself." He finished, letting the kid absorb the enormity of what he'd just said.

He'd... died protecting his sister? He'd had a sister! And he'd... he'd protected her?! But that that wasn't the act of a monster, that was... good, he realised. He couldn't believe he'd done something so selfless... He'd given his life to save another... But... That meant that he was... He must be... a good person.

He finally, even just a little, understood himself... He wasn't trying to maintain peace for his own sake, trying to stop himself getting hurt- he was doing it to protect everyone else. He wasn't half dark- that darkness wasn't him. It just controlled him now and then... Because he was good at heart.

That was the truth of him. He'd died protecting his sister. He was good... that was his true self.


	18. Chapter 18

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Seventeen- Control

 **Authors note: hey guys... So tired. Just posting this quick before bed :-) hope you enjoy it please leave a review (I know you won't let me down) and I will be back tommorow^^**

He was good... He wasn't a monster... The revelation filled something within him. A hole that had been there for so long it had almost become a permanent part of him... It made him whole. Maybe he didn't know who he was- that was a question for another day- but he knew what he was... and what he wasn't... and he wasn't evil.

He felt the darkness return. Creeping back into his mind, like it always did- forcing him to be neutral, and numb, and useless. But, this time, he wasn't weak. The darkness was just a bully. It wasn't a true part of him. It was nothing more than a leech, that used him for its own gain... But he wasn't going to be its pawn anymore!

He threw up a cast iron, mental wall up at it. He didn't care that it probably wouldn't work- the darkness had forced its way upon him before, and broke his defences with no problem last time. He didn't care. He'd had enough! The darkness was not ruling over him! He was not afraid of it anymore!

The darkness reached the barrier. Crashing into it with full force... and it held.

It tried again... Still no purchase was made. It could only linger at the very edges of his mind. Forced back by that solid, hard determination that he wasn't going to be ruled by fear anymore. Fear, he realised... That was it! That was the key to controlling the darkness- to holding it back! As long as he was afraid, he was allowing it easy access into his mind. Everytime he tried to fight it before he'd been terrified of the prospect of a breakdown... and that weakened his attempts to hold it back. But now... he was not afraid. Now the darkness couldn't defeat his iron hard will.

He smiled. Then laughed. He couldn't stop himself. He wasn't free from the darkness- it would forever be there no matter what- but it didn't control him anymore! He was the master of his own mind now! He saw the rabbit in front of him staring at him in complete shock from his outburst... He grinned as he made the connection. Bunny... Guardian... Help... Yes- he could help them! At long last he could help the Guardians! And he would. Even if an army of darkness stood in his way- he'd help, he'd fight for them. Because he'd died protecting his sister... He knew that now... And every single child in the world was in danger. He was not going to let them suffer. He wasn't going to let Pitch win. Not by the Man in the Moon.

Bunny was still staring at him.  
"Jack? What are you-?" He began, confused.  
"I'm going to help save those kids." He grinned. He couldn't help it. He was finally going to do something good! Purely good- and no one, but him, would have to deal with the consequences.  
"But what about that whole breakdown thing?! You're not going to put yourself through all that again?!" He exclaimed. Jack's jaw set into hard determination. Yes. He would. He couldn't restrain the breakdowns- for as long as he was split, he would continue to have them. He couldn't stop them anymore than he could tear out the darkness forever. They were just a part of him... But things had changed now. Now he knew who he was- and he just didn't care. He was going to save those children, regardless. They were his siblings, just as much as his old sister had been.  
"Yes I am." He told Bunny, undeterred confidence burning in his eyes.

It was like he'd been revived. His eyes alive, and shining with fighting spirit- born of the defeat of fear. Now he had strength. He had purpose.  
"And I don't care about the darkness. I don't give a damn what happens to myself. I'll let Pitch burn in hell before he so much as touches those children- ever, again." He growled. He realised how dark that sounded, and noticed the sneaky tendril of black that had seeped through a lapse in his attention. He rammed it back, and reinforced it the barrier... and then he realised... The darkness. It was still there. Why not use it to fight? It hated Pitch as much as the rest of him did right now, for throwing him down here. He could use that. He could channel his hatred, and use it to fight the Boogeyman. It shouldn't be hard- he hated what he'd become under the control of darkness, he hated his life, and he hated what he'd done as the darkness' little shadow puppet.

He briefly let the shadows suffuse his mind, so that he could confer with it... It readily agreed to the offer of revenge against Pitch. Bunny saw the red take over his head, and shrank back in terror. Then, Jack smiled.  
"Yes... I can do this." He grinned, the glowing, red eyes making it a demonic sight. "I'm going to fight Pitch..." The white took over, claiming his mind once more.  
"... And I'm going to save the children... and you." His smile was soft now, as he looked at Bunnymund- determined, but light, like that of a child. Bunny couldn't have been more awestruck at the spirit in front of him. He'd just let the darkness take over! And had the strength to force it back! Without any sign of a visible struggle?!

Jack stood, full of energy, and full of the life he'd lacked before. He looked down at Bunny.  
"So how do we do this?" He asked, not the least bit put off that he didn't have any idea, but optimistic that they'd find a solution. That was a new feeling. He'd never had hope anything would turn out well before... Hope... So this was what it felt like, he thought, savouring the feeling... He liked it...

He'd been around long enough to have heard rumours that so long as one side of a battle had hope, it could not be defeated... He'd always disregarded it. Hoping and wishful thinking couldn't stop the inevitable. It was useless. But now, he realised... it was so much more than that. It was the belief in fate, that things would turn out okay. He'd never understood the power of belief- definitely not experienced it himself- but he got it now. It was the first step to success. And a more powerful force there wasn't.

Bunny felt himself perk up at the spark of hope coming from the winter child. From one who'd given up, and never felt such a feeling before... it was incredible to see.  
"I- I don't know." He admitted, still stunned by what he was sensing- Jack had hope?! He shook away the thought. He needed to think. How did he get the kids to believe in him again? They wouldn't be able to see him, so how could he prove he really was there?! "No kids have even seen us for centuries." He said, silently cursing that decision. Perhaps if they'd let an occasional sighting slip they wouldn't be in this mess right now! Jack's face lit up like a light bulb.  
"Actually, about that." He grinned. "There's a certain kid I know of, that may have caught sight of us whilst we were collecting the teeth." He informed.  
"That's brilliant!" Bunny exclaimed, a smile splitting his face, before a sudden thought occurred to him. "Wait, how do you know?" He asked. Jack smirked as hopped onto the first boulder on the ramp to freedom.  
"I woke him." He said, casually, crouching down and reaching out to the small rabbit below him. "Now, come on, Thumper, we've got a kid to visit." He smiled, picking him up and depositing him on his shoulder.

He bounded up the rocky incline with the endless energy of youth- he seemed to almost be flying up it, even without his staff. Happiness lending wings to his feet. He snatched his staff up, the moment he reached the surface, and leapt into the wind. Whooping with delight, and laughing as he felt claws dig into his hoodie as his passenger clung on for dear life. He was going to save the children!

After a while, he levelled out the flight. Asking the wind to take him on a steady course, straight for Burgess, as fast as the gales could blow. Not long after that, he heard Bunny yell ahead to him, over the wind.  
"So this kid..." He began, eyes squeezed tightly shut so he wouldn't have to see how high they were- it was a good job too, Jack looked down and saw an airplane go past as they overtook it. "Who is it?" He asked.  
"Jamie Bennett." He replied, smiling as he fondly recalled the bright, young boy. "Bit of a dreamer, lives in Burgess." He added, enjoying the simple sensation flight, and the feeling of the wind blowing through his hair... It never got old.

"Jamie..." Bunny muttered. "Wasn't he one of the wakers from when we went round with the tooth collection?" Tooth collection, Jack thought, confused. What tooth? "Sandy had to knock him out, cos he'd stayed up to see the Tooth Fairy... or because someone woke him up." He realised not even hiding his annoyance and disapproval at Jack's interference- still they'd be in a very bad position without it so he let it slide. "Anyway, Tooth said he lost it from a freak sledding accident." He told him, emphasizing the last part- the accusation clear. Oh, so that was it, Jack thought.  
"Whoops." He muttered, in a voice that showed no regret. It wasn't like he hurt the kid- if anything, he gained him a bit of cash.

The wind shot him down through the clouds, and eventually he saw a familiar rooftop. He swooped down to land on it. At the quiet sound of his feet meeting the slate, Bunny opened his eyes. Jack slowly crouched beside Jamie's bedroom, to see what was going on inside. Bunny watching intently from his shoulder. Jamie was there. Clearly in the middle of some kind of speech, talking to his stuffed rabbit toy. Jack remembered one of its eyes had to be replaced with a button after Abbie the greyhound chewed it off as a puppy.  
"If it wasn't a dream, and if you are real, then you have to prove it, like, right now." He said to it, searching its furry face for any signs of a response.

Jack reached up, and placed the rabbit on the windowsill.  
"Now's your chance." He whispered to him. "I'll keep an eye out for Pitch." He reassured him. He pushed the window open, and drew the boy's attention to it with a slight gust of wind. He heard a gasp as Jamie spotted him, and a soft thump as Bunny jumped inside, then he turned away from the window. Searching the streets and the sky for any signs of movement. The darkness at the edge of his mind alert for anything moving in the shadows.

He allowed half his attention to wander into the room behind him, listening to the conversation between Guardian and believer.  
"The Easter bunny." He heard Jamie say in open wonder.  
"How ya doing mate?" Bunny greeted. Jack could imagine the smile on his face as he said it.  
"But?" Confusion touched Jamie's voice now. "What happened?" He asked. "The last time I saw you you were so big and cool." He said.  
"That's thinking generously." Jack muttered, smirking- knowing Bunny would be able to hear him and do nothing about it. Bunny huffed slightly in annoyance as he heard him.  
"We've been going through some rough times recently." Bunny explained, irritation lightening an otherwise grim comment.

Jack's smirk fell. He tensed as he felt movement in the air, and saw a distant shape heading towards them with incredible speed. He gripped his staff.  
"Which is why we need your_." Bunny's last word was drowned out for Jack, as the shape grew into a sleigh, which fell erratically towards the ground, before crash landing. The loud clattering and scraping as it came to a halt made him wince. He looked inside quickly to Bunny- both him and Jamie looking to the window with the noise, though only one could see and hear the winter spirit.  
"North's outside." He informed, briefly. "The sleigh just crash landed." He told him, before flying off to see if the passengers were okay.

He caught glimpses of the reindeer running off out the corner of his eye, but he turned his attention to the sleigh itself, and its rather bedraggled occupants. Apparently North wasn't the only one there, because, as he landed, he heard a female voice calling out.  
"Look!" Tooth called. "Jack!" She grinned in relief, attempting to fly out to meet him. But her wings failed her, and she fell to the ground. She looked more embarrassed than in any pain, but she was definately a lot worse for wear. North had to lean on his sword, using it as a walking stick. Apparently feeling every bit as old as he looked.  
"What are you doing here?" He asked, noting the white of his windswept locks and winter blue eyes.

Jack grinned, and let the darkness sweep across his mind. Nothing more than a quick flash, which he soon got under control. The Guardian's eyes widened, as they stared, stunned, at the display- even backing off a little at the brief appearance of darkness. Jack just didn't stop grinning.  
"I finally got it under control." He smiled. A broad smile grew across Tooth's face with this news.  
"Jack, that's great!" She exclaimed. A similar grin grew on North's face, and he laughed, but he soon snapped back to the situation at hand, much merrier at the sound of good news.  
"Now, come! We need to protect the children." He told him. Jack couldn't agree more. "This boy, Jamie, is the last light." He said, turning towards the Bennett's residence. Last light? Jack thought. Uh oh, things were a lot worse than he thought. But so long as Jamie believed, they could still do this, right? "We have to-." North stopped, as he was confronted with an amazed, staring child.

Jamie's eyes were wide as saucers as he gazed upon the Guardians- even in their weak, weary state, they were still the same heroes he fantasised about.  
"It is you." He grinned, excitably. "I mean it is y-!" He started, happily, but was broken off by a loud thunder like rumble in the sky.

Jack had turned towards it a second before the noise sounded, and cursed his lack of vigilance. He glared up at the sky in hidden anger. Red tainted the edges of his hair, but he held it back- not yet. He saw Jamie staring up at the thick, writhing cloud of dark sand in the sky upon which Pitch stood. The poor kid looked terrified. They had to get him away- there was no telling what Pitch would do.

If he was the last light, then he was the only thing standing between Pitch and victory. The darkness usually drew the line at spreading fear, but, this close to winning, it could be ruthless- and Pitch wouldn't hesitate to cross that line. Jack turned to the Guardians.  
"Get Jamie out of here." He instructed them, tugging up his hood, and leaping into the wind, up onto the closest rooftop. He thought he heard North calling out after him.  
"Be careful, Jack!" But he wasn't sure. He was completely focussed on the task ahead. He kept the black cloud in his sights, but his hood low, so it obscured his features. Let him wonder... let him wonder what he was.

Pitch looked down from his cloud, on his way to extinguish the last light- but it seems the Guardians had beaten him to it. He saw them running off down the street, with a young kid in their midst, but another figure caught his attention. It was slowly striding with purpose towards him, face hidden, but aura menacing. Impossible! He thought he'd dealt with him!

Jack carried on walking, letting his power grow steadily, like a dam ready to burst. Pitch was going down. He was going to be sorry he ever messed with him. He should've never thrown him down that pit. That was a big mistake. Never make an enemy of winter- and never make an enemy of the darkness. He hid the end of his staff behind him. He flicked it back and forth, like a cat's tail- waiting. Calculating. Ready to pounce. The end of the weapon changing smoothly from curved blade, to hooked wood, and back. He slowly stalked towards Pitch. A predator ready to attack... The surge of energy reached its peak.

Without another moments hesitation, he shot up to Pitch with the speed of a diving falcon. His hood falling back to reveal blazing red. He reached him in a heartbeat, right in his face, scythe swinging towards him, as he shot back that infamous catchphrase- eyes glowing crimson red.  
"Boo."


	19. Chapter 19

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Eighteen- Fighting Darkness

 **Authors note: sorry about that last cliffhanger but it won't be the last and it wasn't the worst- you have been warned^^ anyways who's up for an epic fight scene? Here you go! Hope you enjoy it! Please review to let me know what you think (thanks sooooo much to the people who have supported me so far^^) and I will see you with tommorows chapter!**

He swung his scythe at Pitch, with the speed of a thrown knife. But the Boogeyman simply blocked it with his own. Although, barely. Another microsecond and he'd have had a hit. He wasn't expecting it to work, but he was shocked by the after force. The impact jarring every bone he had- and yet Pitch's blade barely responded to the mammoth shock wave. Black star! He cursed. He's gotten stronger!

He gritted his teeth, using the contact with Pitch's weapon to drive it away. Leaving Pitch exposed for a good kick. But the Nightmare King was not so easily overcome. As the blade of the scythe was forced away, he whipped round the shaft. It struck the smaller spirit in the gut, knocking the wind out of him, and sending him tumbling from the sky.

Jack growled, and gathered his determination. Flipping over, and springing off a pylon wire for extra lift. Okay, so it looked like Pitch was more skilled at close quarter combat (not that surprising considering the lack of practise he'd had), how about long range? He shot an arc of red energy at him... It dissipated, easily, against a wall of black sand. Darn it!

His mind worked to come up with a better plan- but that was easier said than done with the reckless shadows screaming at him to throw himself at Pitch and wrestle him. That wouldn't work. He had to be smart- Pitch was too strong now. Although, if he let the beast wash over him... No. What if that still wasn't enough? What if he did something to the Guardians?

He couldn't let the darkness take over, but he still needed it. He had to force it not to completely take over. Keep it enough to rage at Pitch, but restrain it enough to keep some sense. It was hard. Unbelievably hard. With the darkness leaning so heavily over his mind, it wouldn't take much to push him over the edge.

Okay, perhaps restraining the darkness wasn't as easy as he made out. Maybe it did still gnaw constantly at his mind- maybe it was agony to maintain the barrier- he could still do this! He just had to keep focussed on his goal. He couldn't lose sight of it. Sight... Yes! That was it!

He threw another wave of red chaos energy at Pitch, then, not slowing his speed for a second, shot upwards and released another. Darting to the side, he shot another, then dodged down as Pitch retorted with shadow darts of his own. The same black arrows that had killed Sandy. The anger that flared inside him at that threatened to let the darkness overcome him. No! Remember the plan- stick to the plan! With a collosal effort he managed to turn the darkness into red chaos to hurl at Pitch.

They continued like this for a little while- Jack whipping round Pitch, throwing bolts of red chaos and avoiding the returning fire of black arrows. After a particularly big wave of chaos, he saw his chance. He dove straight at Pitch, scythe aimed at the figure behind the dissipating red. He couldn't see him- but neither could Pitch see his approach. He swung, blindly. A jolt of an impact jarred his shoulders... but a metallic clang told him he'd missed, or been blocked.

NO! An explosion of nightmare sand forced him away. He fell back- darn it! He'd really been hoping that would work! At least there was some good, though. He might not be any closer to taking Pitch down, but at least he was distracting him from the Guardians. They were safe, with Pitch attacking him. Besides, it was so much fun, fighting and slashing at the Nightmare King. The contest to see who'd draw red first. Red like anger. Red like him! He caught himself just in time, and pushed back the darkness as it tried to further its control. He shook his head to clear it. This was a lot harder than he anticipated- wait! The shadows had picked up on something far below him.

Was he distracting Pitch?.. Or was it the other way round? A group of Nightmares were all running towards the same spot. No!

He shot away from Pitch, and headed for the Guardians- surely enough- surrounded by Nightmares. He saw the dark mares and yelled a cry of fury, as wiped them out with a series of black ice spikes. The pain in his mind spiked unbearably high as he did. He'd protected the Guardians. The darkness really didn't like that... and worse, in his fear for the older spirits, the blockade keeping the darkness out had weakened to the point of disintegration. With the last of his strength, he forced the darkness back to the very edge of his mind and locked the mental doors keeping it out.

He panted, heavily. Shuddering where he stood as he leant on his staff. He... he needed a break- at least from the darkness being so close to taking over. It still took a lot of concentration to hold it back now, but with it restricted at the edge of his mind, the weight was bearable rather than overwhelming... But it wasn't easy. Nothing in his life was. He had to organise his thoughts before he went back up against Pitch...

He thought about what had just happened with Guardians and the close shave with losing control... He couldn't let himself get afraid... So he couldn't let himself think the Guardians were in any danger at any time. He had to protect them at all costs- for his own sanity, as well as for them.

Okay- first priority was the Guardians. After that, then he could deal with Pitch. He could do this. The Guardians and the children of the world were depending on him. He dropped his head as the stress of holding back the darkness took its toll... He... He could still do this...

He was so lost in his own thoughts, he didn't notice Jamie standing just behind him. A slight frown furrowed his face, as he thought he heard a voice in the wind. It whispered to him. Well... it wasn't really a voice at all. It was like the wind was talking- the whistles and howls forming words. He listened to what it said.  
"No fear... Conquer the darkness... Protect the Guardians... Fight the nightmares. Fight the shadows..."

"No! Fear!"

Jamie's eyes widened with the words... Then determination came over his features. The angel was right (for he'd decided that what it must be), he just had to overcome the darkness. Face up to his fears. He could do this- he wasn't afraid of it, anymore. He balled his fists with determination, and ran at the nearest Nightmare. The Guardians, who'd been recovering from the exhausting run here, shouted out.  
"No!"  
"Jamie- stop!"  
"Look out!" But he didn't stop. His hand sank straight into one of the Nightmares.

Jack muttered to himself. Building up his will, and his strength to fight.  
"No fear... Conquer the darkness." He told himself. He wouldn't let the darkness control him! Not anymore! "Protect the Guardians." They had to survive- they deserved to... Which meant Pitch was going down! He narrowed his eyes, and gripped his staff. "Fight the shadows." He growled. "No! Fear!" He yelled- leaping up into the wind, and letting the darkness suffuse him once more.

He shot a bolt of red lightning at Pitch, but then gasped as he noticed his little 'time out' had cost him dearly. A huge group of Nightmares surrounded them once more. He gritted his teeth, with solid determination. He couldn't let himself fear for them- couldn't feel fear- so he charged straight at them, summoning a wave of chaos to protect the Guardians. But the darkness wouldn't have it. It dug its heels in- stubbornly refusing to cooperate. It wouldn't help its arch nemesis. He cursed the time it wasted him, and shoved it carelessly aside. Ignoring the stabbing pain it caused him, and calling upon the light instead.

The regular ice wasn't as huge or aggressive as the fury driven chaos shockwaves, but it was just as effective. He charged straight through the Nightmares ranks, bright blue light and white ice cutting through beast after beast. But there was so many! They appeared faster than he could cut them down! He fought not to panic- and then he heard it.

An impossible, joyful noise ringing out across the air... And a stream of shining, golden sand drifted past in front of him. He froze in disbelief... Dreamsand? An astonished smile spread across his face. Dreamsand! He turned to see dozens of gold tendrils floating around the street, spreading out through the windows of sleeping children's bedrooms, to give them sweet dreams. He felt like cheering at the sight of the magical sand, but, wait- if the sand was here, then, that meant that-?

A huge gathering of gold caught his attention. In it he thought he saw a figure of a familiar little man form. He caught his breath... Then the sand surrounding him vanished. He was back. The Sandman- Sandy- was back! He was alive! But Jack's elation was short lived. A jet black whip flew towards the Sandman, which he manage to intercept it with his own. Jack followed the black whip up- Pitch was fighting Sandy whip on whip

... It was just like before. The fight. Between Guardian and Boogeyman. The déjà vu stunned him, as he realised... the desicion of who to help... finally had to be made. He had to choose a side. Who should he fight for?

His mind raced. The darkness became a wild fury of attacks as it pounded at his mental wall- he could already hear its dark intent. Get him! Get the Guardian! Get the Sandman! Get'im-Get'im-! So wild was the chaos infusing the shadows, the words merged into one. But the intent remained as clear and as powerful as ever: fight the Sandman...

But, then he stood his ground. No. He would not. He... was not... going to hurt... Sandy. He... was going... to help... He struggled to fight the intent of the darkness... Help the Guardians!

And with that final, blazing storm of will- he forced the darkness out of his mind. Not forever, but for now. His brilliant blue eyes swung from Pitch to Sandy. What should he do?

They darted around the streets in front of him- taking in the scene. The Guardians were fighting- what? The Guardians were fighting?! They were sagged against a building, weak and exhausted from a simple run, earlier- how were they-? The dreamsand, he realised. Pitch giving the children nightmares was what made them doubt the existence of the good storybook figures in the first place- now Sandy was giving them sweet dreams again, their faith in goodness, and the Guardians, was being restored. If Sandy could spread his dreamsand around the world, the children would start believing again!

Unfortunately, it seemed Pitch had worked that out too, and was furiously fighting the Sandman. Keeping him from spreading his dreams. The other Guardians were stuck fighting the Nightmares... someone needed to take care of Pitch. But distracting the Boogeyman wouldn't be enough. He'd still go for Sandy no matter what- he was the Guardian's key to success. No, it wasn't enough to just fight him- they had to get him away from here. Away from Sandy, so he could do his job... and suddenly, Jack understood what he had to do.

The darkness... Only he could do this... and it was the only way. He'd have to become almost all dark for this- it would be almost impossible to maintain such a biased frame of mind- but he'd do it. He was not the darkness' puppet anymore! He was its master. He was going to command it- force it to do as he ordered. By all laws of physics, magic and anything else that existed, this should be impossible, but he never had played by the rules. His very existence contradicted them. He was a spirit ruled by two forces- that should not have been possible. Controlling the darkness was also impossible, but he didn't care. He refused to be denied. He could do this. Now was his time.

He ran along the roof, building speed, and the charged with the wind, full speed, at Pitch. With a cry of determination, he threw himself into him. Somehow, Pitch hadn't seen him coming- too occupied with Sandy to notice the lithe, no longer neutral spirit dash at him.

They collided hard- and together, they descended into the shadows. Swallowed by darkness.


	20. Chapter 20

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Nineteen- Lose Control

 **Authors note: okay can I just say thanks for the amazing response to my last chapter- I'm so over the moon that so many of you are really getting into this story and enjoying it so much^^ right, the chapter- I won't keep you suspended any longer! Please review at the end of it and I will be back tommorow- enjoy the chapter!^^**

Everything went black, and the world deadened, as they entered the realm of shadows. Pitch snarled at him, and shoved him hard, but he held on. He couldn't let go. He couldn't let Pitch escape. He had to keep him here, in the shadows- buy the Guardians as much time as he could, and hope it was enough. But things weren't going well.

He could feel the tug of the real world, as he fought to stay in the shadows. He wasn't supposed to be here. Not with the light still shining in him, albeit subdued, and barely even present. But however small that light was, the darkness didn't like it. They weren't compatible- and the shadows were trying to force him our because of it. If he was just passing through he'd be fine, but he wasn't. He was staying in the shadows- or attempting to. So, on top of fighting Pitch, he was fighting to stay put in the darkness that was trying to throw him out. In fact, the only reason he was still here was that he had hold of Pitch, and was using him as an anchor.

The pain was just soul destroying. The sheer weight and size of darkness crushing the light... It rivalled a breakdown for agony, but it was constant- like his head was getting repeatedly shot with bullets. But, for all his efforts of fighting the darkness, the pain and keeping hold of Pitch, it just wasn't enough.

The Nightmare King drew out his jet black scythe, and swung it. Jack had to let go. He had to- or else he risked losing something, and then there'd be noone to stop Pitch.

He found himself floating in shadow, as Pitch's figure grew less distinct. Light slowly formin around him, as the world left the shadows-no! He refused to go back! He had to stop Pitch. If he got back, he'd attack the Guardians again, Sandy would have to stop spreading dreams, and the scales that had delicately leant ever so slightly in the Guardian's favour would balance. He couldn't stand that. He hated balance! He had not come so far-and gone through so much pain- overcoming the darkness, and finding a way to break the neutral hell he'd been living, for this battle to come to an impasse. No more equal! No more undecided! No more split! The battle was going to be over! One side was going win! He was sick and tired of light and dark battling! No more fighting- it was time to finish this!

But to do that... he had to also become one thing. The shadows wouldn't allow the light to enter its domain- and the only way was to fight Pitch in his home territory. He had to master the shadows- control them and bend them to his will so he could travel through them... and only the darkness could do that. He couldn't be light for this. But so be it.

He knew what he had to do. He'd had enough of the hell of keeping peace in his mind. Enough holding back the darkness. He had to lose control- let the darkness rule him. It was a utterly terrifying thought, but he had no choice. He never had- in anything. He gritted his teeth, repeating one thought in his mind. Get Pitch- don't let him escape! Don't let Pitch escape. Don't let him escape. Soon the darkness was chanting it too- eager to enter the shadows and pursue the Boogeyman.

He could only pray he didn't do anything else whilst he was out, but what other choice did he have?

He surrendered his mind.

Get Pitch! Where is he? Get the shadow man! He dove into the shadows. It took only a single whim for them to bend to his command, and take him instantaneously to his prey. He was on the verge of leaving- entering the normal world. Who said he could leave? He thought, darkly, dragging him deeper into the depths of shadows like an infinite stretch of ocean.

He was in complete control now. The shadows did as he commanded! He controlled them! He was their master... and finally, without the puny light to restrain him, now he could have a real fight against the old shadow spirit- see who was truly the master of the shadows. Who was the stronger agent of darkness- and he wasn't allowing the outcome to be anything other than his victory, and Pitch's annihilation.

He was the darkness that demons called demon. That Nightmares had nightmares about. That fear itself was trembled before.

Moon boy thought this little Pitch man could wield a scythe better than he could? Ha. He slashed his scythe at Pitch, swiping for his stomach- then head, chest, deflecting Pitch's attack, then continuing his furious onslaught. The clang of their two scythes meeting rang out every quarter of a second, as they duelled furiously- scythe on scythe. Pitch was forced into defensive measures against the attacking blur of the dark winter spirit. This was purely a test of skills- the shadows wouldn't help him here. They wouldn't obey any master until one of them emerged as victor... and Pitch was failing.

Every time he so much as attempted a offensive move, the red demon was there to block it, take full advantage of the lapse in defence, and follow with an attack of his own. Each one bringing the older closer and closer to the edge of defeat. The broad, demonic grin on the dark spirit's face twisting with glee, as he gained power over the other. This was fun! He just barely missed Pitch's head. The poor, pathetic Black man was no match for him! Fear flashed in Black's eyes, as the red scythe got closer and closer to biting. Then he felt it.

A shift in power, as the shadows saw a greater strength in the crimson eyed demon. He was the true master of the shadows, now. They recognised his as their king.

Suddenly, Pitch found himself in a vice grip, as the shadows constricted around him, preventing him from moving an inch. The sardonic smirk swelled with victory, twisting his face even further... and then he banished Pitch from the shadows. He kicked him out of his own kingdom. The shadows would no longer welcome him- were no longer his own. Those passageways weren't open to him... And now he was stuck in a land that wasn't his own. Gold sand floating everywhere. He was trapped in a land in which he had no power. The Guardians had won.

The demon leapt out of the shadows next too him- then white took over the red once more. Now the dark only had little more than a tenth of his mind under its sway. It was locked behind closed doors again. He made it look like it was barely harder than flipping over a page, switching between the two- even if it was a lie.

The reality was, that switch was the hardest he'd ever endured. As the light returned, so did the breakdown bordering headache. The sheer strength it took to resume control from the darkness was ridiculous, and left him more than a little weak. But he didn't let any of it show. He looked to be in complete control. Like he could go on like this all day. Even if it was all a false mask- he was very good at pretending. Everything was fine. If he could fool himself into thinking he was okay during three hundred years of hell, he could make Pitch believe he was still at full strength now.

He whipped his weapon down and held it still, the scythe turning fluidly into a staff. Yet more proof of his apparent control- and it was terrifying Pitch. The unnatural changes between the two were enough to make fear itself afraid. He'd just been proclaimed king of the shadows, and now he was an ally of the Guardians?! It just wasn't right! Wasn't possible! And Pitch didn't like it- one- little- bit.

He stood in a strong stance, glaring at the Boogeyman with all the authority of fate itself. Like he wasn't a broken vessel on the verge of shattering (he always had been two faced). Pitch stared in horror at him, then turned, scampering away like the coward he was. Jack watched, mildly amused. He was trying to run away from him in his own home town? Well, see how well that works out for him. He reached a hand up, and twirled it slowly in a nearby tendril of gold. It gently floated round his hand for a moment, and when he was sure he had his attention, he beckoned it with his finger.

Pitch was trying to escape through one of the physical doorways to his lair, since the shadows weren't open to him. A pity, for him, that Jack could see where the entrance was, and knew all the shortcuts in this town like the back of his hand.

Pitch was fleeing like a hare in a hunt- ironic considering a rabbit was amongst the hunters. He reached the frozen lake with the rotted bed on the other side, thinking he might just be able to make it. He glanced behind him, fearfully. Not looking where he was going. A bad move. He crashed straight into North, and fell back onto the ice. How had he-? But he wasnt alone.

He stared up at the assembled Guardians. What? How had they got here?! He noticed the monster spirit standing by their side. The beast that defied the laws of both nature and magic. Even the darkness viewed him as a monster. But he was just stood at the sidelines, letting North and the Guardians deal with him. What was he doing? He didn't like the way he stood back there, not doing anything. It made him paranoid. Every little thing he 'd done had a reason behind it. It had have one, or else he'd tear his mind apart- so why wasn't he doing anything?! Why was he just standing there? What was his game?!

"Leaving the party so soon?" North asked.  
"You didn't even say goodbye." Tooth pointed out, deadly calm as she tossed him a coin. He looked down at it, confused, then back up at the- POW! He was thrown back by a solid, hard punch to his jaw- knocking his tooth out.

Jack smirked, as he watched. Nice one- Tooth just proved that whole "punch like a girl" thing was a myth. That had to hurt. He was quite enjoying this show. It was really entertaining- especially the way Pitch squirmed at just him being there. And his face after the punch? Oh, that was just a picture. Like a drama queen!

He watched as he got up off the ground.  
"You can't get rid of me. Not forever." He said, looking straight at Jack. "You can't ever escape the Shadows." Jack almost chuckled at the feeble attempt to get under his skin. He really thought he could tell him something he didn't already know? He'd figured all this nonsense out a long time ago. He'd hardened his armour to it centuries back.  
"No. There will always be darkness in the world." He agreed. "But you can't get rid of the light either." He pointed out. People always thought it was bad that evil would always exist- but that was a good thing. So long as there was darkness, there was goodness too.

Pitch looked nervous now. He didn't even need to listen to the shadows to know he was afraid. Then, his fear abated suddenly, as he chuckled darkly.  
"You can't control the darkness forever." He smirked. "Sooner or later it'll tear you apart." He chuckled again, a hint of victory appearing in his eyes. He thought he was going to get out of this, did he?  
"You're relying, perhaps, on your little backup?" He asked, the Nightmares coming out from around the clearing in response to his words. The triumph in Pitch's eyes was replaced with cold fear.

Jack stepped forwards into the middle of the lake, taking menacing steps closer to Pitch. He scrambled back.  
"No- you can't control them!" He shot at him, trying to comfort himself more than anything. "You aren't pure darkness." Jack stopped, and suddenly a great power seemed to come from him. Power that was both terrifying and awe inspiring

"I am the darkness and I am the light. I am both at once. Master of my own mind, the good and the evil." He proclaimed power and menace suffusing his words, as red slowly started taking over the white and blue.

Pitch shook his head in disbelief, wide eyed. "The darkness isn't too happy with you, Pitch." He informed him. "You failed." He said, letting the words hang like an executioners sentence. Then he smirked. "Besides, the Nightmares feed off fear." He said, the inevitability of Pitch's downfall suddenly becoming very real. He glared straight at him. The red glow in his eyes becoming full, as any remaining traces of blue vanished. "Who am I to deny them their meal?" He finished darkly, and snapped his fingers. The noise sharp and quick.

The dark mares obeyed, charging towards their former ally. No longer recognising him as friend, but food. Pitch turned and ran, his fear so evident even the Guardians could see it. He headed straight for his old lair. Good. The demon spirit thrust his hand out at the fleeing former Nightmer King. A storm of dark red chaos erupted around him.

It lifted Pitch up in a whirlwind of dark crimson energy. Red lightning crackling throughout the whole clearing, around the master that was its eye. Pitch flailed- tossing and churning him about within the storm-nightmare sand whirling round with him. Lashing out at him whenever it got the chance. He swept the storm over to the ancient bed then tightened it into a funnel. Spiralling round and round in a tornado that stretched towards the sky, as it sucked everything down into the hole beneath the bed. Pitch was pulled closer and closer to the tunnel. He clawed at the edges in an attempt to escape, but he didn't stand a chance. He was forced into the darkness- his trailing cry of "Nooo!" fading into the distance. Then he was gone.

The twister pulled itself in with him, then Jack slammed his fist shut. The exit shook and snapping itself shut with a resounding boom.

The spirit who had closed it, glared at it with satisfaction. It was over.

Then, he collapsed.


	21. Chapter 21

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Twenty- Over?

 **Authors note: here we are^^ this stories coming to a close now^^ I hope you've been enjoying reading it and continue to do so but please let me know what you think- It always means so much^^ and I will be back tommorow^^**

He woke up too easily. Far too easily. He normally woke like a regular teen- taking hours to function properly- but, this time, he was fully awake the moment his eyes opened. That was his first indication something was amiss.

North was bending over the bed (apparently he was in a bed, and apparently North was there), telling him to wake up and grinning like a little kid. He was just thoroughly confused. What the Moon was going on? Where was he? What was he doing here? He struggled to remember what had happened, but it was all blank spot- no, he realised... black spot. The battle came back to him. The interior and exterior fight that left his very soul ripped in shreds. Suppressing the darknessc controlling it and wrenching back control... he guessed it was all too much for him. He'd probably fainted, or something equally embarrassing... But if he'd been so broken and torn up, why did he feel fine now? The wounds and scars of that battle should still be clawing at him- something wasn't right.

He looked round trying to figure out something. He didn't know what the something was, but it was definately... something. He just couldn't tell what. He looked past North, ignoring his comment of "You had us worried," in favour of figuring out what, in the world, was going on. He noted the lack on darkness in his mind- obviously hed been dark before he blacked out. Then he saw through the window. It was getting dark outside... It wasn't that odd on its own, but the style of the room, sound of the yetis, and the icy tundra outside, told him he was at the North Pole. Which meant it wasn't early evening- it was early winter.

It had been Easter the last he remembered- how long had he been out?! He frowned at North.  
"Why am I here? How... How long have I been unconscious?" He asked. Had it been months? Years? Decades? For all he knew, Sandy could've kept him asleep for the next couple of millennium. North grinned sheepishly, and rubbed the back of his neck.  
"Well, we had to keep you asleep for a few months, but you are here, because..." His excited, barely contained, grin returned. Jack took the pause as an opportunity to think. Okay, so at least it wasn't too bad. But why wake him now? Why was he here? He waited to find out. "We have found a way to fix you!" He announced, awaiting his overjoyed reaction, but he didn't get what he was expecting.

"What?" He muttered. No. He couldn't have... That was impossible. There was just no way he could've- wait- didn't he get him to-. "North you promised!" He yelled, but the Guardian just shrugged it off- still waiting for the excited grin and overwhelming happiness.  
"Was not me. Tooth, Bunny and Sandy would not rest until they found way to save you- and you never said I couldn't help them out." He grinned.. but the smile slipped when he saw the spirit withdrawing into himself. He didn't seem to be overjoyed at all.

This was just too easy, he thought. Too simple. Even if he had found a cure (which he highly doubted), it wouldn't be without risks... And with his situation, he could only imagine what the sacrifice or danger could be.  
"What is the matter, Jack? Aren't you happy? You are finally going to be free-." He said, confused. But he was interrupted by a quiet, yet clear, voice.  
"What's the catch?" Jack asked, stone faced. North frowned.  
"Catch?" He repeated, unable to stop the subtle signs that said he was hiding something- and Jack noticed. He looked straight up at the Guardian.  
"If there's something my life's taught me, North, its that there isn't a light without the dark." No pain no gain- or something like that. North's smile came back a little- trying to shrink or sugarcoat the answer.  
"Oh, it's nothing, really. The plan is to make you stand in the light of another eclipse- this time when the moon at front- and then you can fight the shadows, and get rid of them once and for all!" He grinned, but Jack could see the further implications for it. He bowed his head, going deeper into himself.  
"And what if the shadows win?" He muttered. It wasn't a question- he knew what it would mean. It would be no exaggeration to say it would be the end the Guardians. "I can't risk that." He said, point blank refusing the idea.

North was stunned. He was going to say no to his only chance for freedom, sanity, peace and everything he'd always wanted.. because of the chance it could go wrong?! He didn't believe Jack would lose for a second. He knew the boy was strong. He could do this! Did he not believe in himself?

"Why not just-... no." He suggested, but then turned down. He'd been about to say why not just keep him asleep for all eternity- that way no one could get hurt by him again- but he knew as well as anyone that holding something back was only delaying the inevitable. "Or you could..." He trailed off again. He could try and control the darkness like he had last time, but that idea was just madness. He knew the darkness- it was a part of his own mind. It was wild, and hated restraint. He'd done it once before, but that had nearly destroyed him and it would only take a single slip in concentration to destroy everything... and that was far too likely. He was (always had been) a bomb waiting to go off... and now North said he'd found a way to diffuse him. But it could also detonate him.

Under full shadow control he'd be a real monster- worse than Pitch. He could destroy the Guardians, and everything they stood for, all before breakfast- and then go on to destroy the world if he felt like it. He couldn't risk that... unless... he had some extra security. He let his eyes sag closed, as he resigned himself to his fate... and the following words.  
"I'll do this on one condition, North." He muttered, his tone made North dread his offer. "I turn dark. Kill me." He stated, simply.

North stared at him in horror. No! How could he kill the boy?! He simply wouldn't! He refused! A quiet voice made him pause in his panic. The words sounded like they became harder to speak, as he saw crawl into his hair once more.  
"If a dog turned rabid would you kill it? It puts it out its misery- its better for the animal- and stop it being a danger to others." North couldn't deny the logic, but that was the worst thing. This truly was the safest, and best, option. But he hated it. How could he kill the boy that he'd come to grow so fond of, even without realising it.

"Please North." He muttered, the words were definately a little forced now. "Its hurting me just to say this right now. I'm tired of the pain. I just want it to end... one way or another... You'd be helping me out." He said. It was the hollow, dead quality of the words that broke him. They didn't sound sorrowful, or even painful... they just sounded empty. He'd had enough... he wanted it to end. North sighed, bowing his head. If it would help him, and he'd be grateful for it... if it was what he wanted... he'd do it. But only because he knew it wouldn't have to come to that. The boy would defeat the darkness, he knew he would. He had complete faith in him... But he'd only suceeded once before.. He rid himself of the doubts, though they still lingered uneasily at the edge of his mind. Jack would succeed! He knew he would!... Right?

"I do not like these promises you make." He muttered. "But if it is what you want." He told him. Jack's eyes almost fell as he heard those words but then he raised them again, as he realised something incredible...

Want...

Something warm spread through him. He could- even only occasionally, or just this once- have... what he wanted. He could... let himself, wonder, what he wanted, and... for now, at least... it was possible for him to have it. Did he... Did he want this? He savoured the thought of that four letter word. The sensation of thinking about his dreams, indulging his hopes... What he wanted... It was a bliss such as he never felt before. He could think about his hopes. He could dream. The torn spirit, allowed to think to nothing but survival and sanity, finally could dream. He had hopes, he had dreams- he'd finally created some good memories in the past few times with the Guardians- and he could finally see the good and the wonder in the world... So this was what the Guardians protected ... He could see why they fought so hard for it... It truly was incredible.

He nodded at North. Yes. He wanted to do this. And... and... (He was trying to unlock his lungs that appeared to have frozen with the thought)... he could get what he wanted.

Of course, he had to make the most of these feelings- he might not be able to feel them for long- but, until then, what a feeling! A slow, smirk spread across Jack's face.  
"Then, how about I make you another one? If I make it- me and you are going sledding down Everest." He promised. The unexpected ray of sunshine made North laugh.  
"That was joke, right?" He grinned. Jack only smirked back. Oh no, he was being completely serious about that, and he looked forwards to it- if he made it that is. He left his staff/scythe in the room. He didn't want it to be anywhere near him, in case things went wrong. Then, he opened the door... and he froze in the doorway. Reality suddenly hitting him hard.

He was... actually doing this... He'd finally.. be... free... One way or another, this constant battle- and constant pain-... It would all be over. He'd... he'd be free... No more darkness... How could-?... It just wasn't-... But it was... How?... He couldn't, he... He felt his face tremble, as his eyes grew wet.  
"Jack." He heard North's gentle, concerned voice behind him. "You're shaking." He noticed.

Jack squeezed his eyes shut, trying to keep a shake out of his breathing and voice and words and body.  
"I'm terrified." He whispered, a slight crack in his voice. "I just... can't- this can't be real! I mean... what if it isn't! What if this is all just a dream! It can't possibly be-... It... I..." His breath was quick and disbelieving in chest, it was almost impossible to speak past the lump in his throat. He couldn't believe it... Everything he'd ever dreamed, that he'd always put down as impossible... it had always seemed just that... How could he believe that he was going to finally get it? The darkness... going away. The pain... no more. Himself... happy. No... he just couldn't bring himself to believe it. He was just a broken child, desperately seeking someone to reassure him... and North was right there.

He placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, stilling his trembles with his steadfast warm touch. The boy beneath it calmed with that firm comforting gesture... and, slowly... His breathing got under control... He stopped shaking... The unfallen years went away... The weights he'd been forced to bear lifted. The disbelief... and the fear... It slowly gave way to a steady, strong acceptance. He bowed his head down and took one final deep breath... and then he muttered the words that would forever change everything for him. The first step towards the beginning of his life... or the end of it.  
"I'm ready."

Jack held a steadied breath, as North led him upwards through the workshop. As he went past, many of the yetis bowed to him. It was just their heads most the time, but... but it was just madness! The way they nodded, and smiled, at him... They.. respected him?! And. And... (He searched for the word that escaped him) admired him?! He sometimes couldn't keep from staring at the alien expressions.. He'd never- ever- been looked at like that... He swallowed, unnerved by the unfamiliar feeling, and tried not to look at the yetis, as North led him towards the globe room.

North entered first and the indistinct voices in it stopped. By the time Jack got in there, all the Guardians were looking at him. Sandy was grinning reassuringly at him, but he nervous. The golden man couldn't hide the slight fear he felt. Not from the shadows. Jack decided to ignore it, as Sandy gave him a thumbs up. "You can do it." He felt certain he was saying. Jack smiled, and nodded thankfully at him.

Bunny was stood to one side, also giving a reassuring smile- and Tooth was hovering next to him, attempting to smile through the concern which was plain to see...

... And then Jack looked past them all, across to the other side of the room- the one closest the globe... A large shaft of moonlight, almost tinted slightly blue in colour, lit up the floor like a spotlight.

Jack felt the world stop turning... That was it. The place where he'd... finally be freed from the darkness- or else killed so he wouldn't have to worry about it anymore.

He took a dazed step towards it... and then stopped. He still just couldn't believe this was happening. Could he really do this? Was this all a dream?

Tooth saw his face- filled with doubt, trepidation and fear- and she couldn't help herself. She flew up, slowly... and wrapped her arms around him. He gasped, horrified, and froze in terror. Fear flashing through his mind!... and then, slowly... he realised he didn't have to push her away. He didn't need to worry about hurting her, because, after today, he wouldn't ever do that... and he could let himself... care! He could... let himself... love. The overflow of that huge emotion flooded through him. The enormity of it stunned him. This was the force that caused the rise and the fall of many an empire... This was love...

He allowed himself to relax, and wrapped his own arms around her. He felt her stiffen a little in shock, and then hold him that bit closer. He let himself get drawn into the embrace. The feeling of giving affection- and receiving it in return, it... was such a beautiful feeling! He let his head rest on her shoulder, and felt how close she was. The warmth of her breath on his back. The smooth touch of her feathers. The soft comfort of her embrace taking away all his worry. He forced away the moisture that threatened to form in his eyes... Love.. He could love... and he could be loved. No amount of words, in the world, could express how it felt. Poets had dedicated their lives to trying to describe it, but they did t even get close. Wonderful and beautiful didn't even get near to the feeling... It was... The most magical feeling...

Slowly, they loosened their grip on each other... and she let go. Keeping hold of his arm, she squeezed it comfortingly. Then he felt another presense at his back. A soft pat on his shoulder.  
"We believe in you, mate." Bunny said, reassuringly. It was amazing, perhaps- considering their rocky past, and previous hatred for each other- that Bunny was the one to give him the greatest strength. Help him find the will to go against the darkness. He'd never... been believed in before. They really had faith in him? He didn't even have faith in himself, but... they really did. He could see it in their eyes- they truly believed he was going to succeed. It felt as though someone had hardened something in his veins. He stood taller, eyes hard with determination, as he faced the moonlight once more.

He heard the light sound of dreamsand and felt it swirl past his arm. Sandy's final well wishing gesture. It might very well be the last he ever saw of the sand... Of all of them. He took them in one last time... North... Tooth... Bunny...Sandy...

He took one step towards the beam, every heart beat suddenly loud slow and imposing in his ears...

Two...

He heard deep inward breath with a controlled shake, as the room had suddenly gone very silent...

Three...

He could feel the moonlight touching the edges of his hands, his face and his feet. The darkness, suddenly wide awake, screamed at him to turn back- get away from the moonlight! But he stiffened his resolve. It was time to end this fight. Once and for all...

Four...

He heard North whisper three last words behind him.  
"Good luck Jack."

Five.

He was stood in the centre of the circle. As though a floodlight had suddenly been switched on behind his eyes, everything was turned white.

The world before him vanished, as he was transported into the depths of his mind.


	22. Chapter 22

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Twenty One- No More

 **Authors note: the final fight guys- this is it! Oh forgot to mention last time: the soundtrack to this chapter and the previous one is 'Destiny of the chosen' you can find it on YouTube (the bit up big build up at the beginning is the last chapter then when it does the thing at the end of the build up its teleporting into his mind then the bits afterwards are this chapter^^) hope you like it! Please let me know what you think- its almost over now! Eek! See you tommorow- when only the light or the dark will have made it.**

It was weird. His mind separated completely into two halves, and yet, at the same time, was the basis and battleground for the fight. The battle for who was to own his mind was about to take place- in the mind itself... and yet it was fought upon by the two sides of itself. It was somewhat confusing, but he didn't try to make sense of it- it just was. When he said "he", he meant the person who he was.

Each of the two sides of his mind, and soul, were set at opposite sides of the place for which they fought. Seperate from it, and yet also a part of it. The dark on one side- the light on the other. The dark clouded with dark energy, menacing red flashes scattered throughout it. The opposite soft and gentle. If the dark resembled a thunder storm, the light resembled a soft, wintery landscape- and at the front of each, stood a single figure. A representation of both sides.

The boy with white hair, crystal blue eyes and hooked winter staff... and the demon with twisted, glowing, red eyes, crimson hair and deadly, razor edged scythe. Everything he was or could be. All that made him up- the good and the bad- and if he was in any doubt as to whether he was good before, he had none now.

His heart lay with the good. He saw things from the Jack Frost's blue eyes. That was what he meant by "he." That was who he was right now. A figure in his mind.

The battle wasn't going to be physical, but mental. A duel of the mind.

The two figures stood facing each other, ready to fight- to end the never ending war. To win they had to destroy the opponent, or take their side of the battlefield. Take their side of the mind so that they no longer were a part of it, or destroy them so they no longer existed.

He saw the leech of the darkness Jack Overland in his distant sights. The red haired demon opposite him laughed, and the thick clouds of the darkness behind him rumbled, and flashed, like a storm. They were both linked to the area to which they belonged- it reacted in response to their state and emotions. The light behind Frost hardened- as cold and strong as glacial ice.  
"I thought this day would never come." Overland drawled, the flashes of red stilling and becoming deadly calm behind him. "I didn't think goody two shoes Mr Innocent had it in him to fight the darkness head on." The light stiffened and sharpened, but shone almost tauntingly at the red.  
"I've beaten you before. I can do it again." Frost grinned. Overland laughed- the shadows rumbled.  
"One battle, against hundreds. I love those odds." He boasted. Frost gripped his staff tighter. So what? He was could still do this. He was going to defeat the darkness- there would be no more shadows after today. He hoped he was ready for him.  
"Any last words?" He (Frost) smirked. It was incredible how much more optimistic he was as Frost.

He was so much more joyful- and he was thoroughly enjoying taunting the darkness right in its ugly, red face. So this was the light of him, huh? He liked it.

Overland lowered his head, menacingly- eyes still burning straight into him.  
"Say hi to the Guardians when I send them to join you." It said, its sardonic smirk more like a snarl. Then it leapt forwards, running towards the light spirit. He too pushed off towards the dark, and started sprinting. Come on! It was time to finish this! They drew closer... and closer... and closer.

No more darkness! No more fighting!

Closer... and closer.

No more. No more! Time to end it, Shadowhead!

Closer... closer... closer... closer...

He raised his staff with a furious battle cry, a snarl disfigured the demon's face as he swung its own bladed staff back.

Two more steps.

The dark leapt off the floor, high above the stunned light's head... Time slowed, as Overland flew upwards... and then the scythe fell.

He blocked the descending scythe, but the impact almost broke him. If this was his regular staf, it would've snapped, but this was all in his mind- not that that made it any less dangerous than reality. His staff didn't snap, but all of his entire being was almost destroyed by it... and that really rattled him. He'd nearly gone down with that blow. He'd been so close to being wiped out with the first hit! Man in the moon- how strong was the darkness?!

He barely had time for the realisation to hit him. This was the full strength of shadow beating on him now. Everything that'd ever happened to Pitch or the Guardians- every thing the shadows had done-... it was only half of what it could do. It had been held back by the good- only possessing one half of the Frost/Overland hybrid. Half the demon it could be. But there was no restricting it now. It was throwing all of its immense strength at him. This was not good.

But he was not going down that easily! He shoved the weapon away, and charged up at him (in the battleground of thought neither wind or chaos was needed to fly- only will). They crashed into each other, and Overland fell back to use Frost's upwards momentum against him. He struck him in the stomach, as he rolled overhead with the collision. Frost, almost paralysed by the blow, just managed to roll in time to avoid the second blow from the scythe.

The darkness, in the distance, boomed menacingly. Furious at the failed attack. The white haired shot round with another charge at the red- building speed with all the determination he could muster. This time, the demon met him head on. They crashed again. Pain knocked through him, as the collision sent him spiralling down. The impact throbbed throughout him and left him dazed. But he snapped to attention, as he saw fury blazing, blood red eyes- and the scythe- shooting down after him, with a battle cry. Scythe aimed to cut him straight through.

He panicked, but gripped his staff with both hands and smacked him, hard, so that the attack forced wide. But the red only seemed angered and not injured by the blow. Furious at his narrow escape, Overland jabbed the scythe up into his back. It was only the shaft, but that end of the weapon was as sharp and pointed as the blade. More pain, as the spear like point sank into him, but he shook himself. He was not going to let it end like this! He- he was going to beat him! But that didn't ease the agony. He flew at him again.

Again and again they threw themselves at each other- slashing and fighting, and landing blows as well as recieving them. But the fight went badly for one.

The light flashed, as yet another cut was made, weakening with every hit. Flinching away from the pain, and fading ever so slightly- revealing the true state of the boy, who fought as hard as he had done since the very beginning of the fight. But... there were some, subtle changes... His movements were slower- heavier. He didn't hurl himself at the dark was with quite the same energy as before. He was tiring- no he was weakening... The light was fading.

They crashed into each other one more time- and this time neither was backing away from it. The shafts of the two weapons locked, as Overland and Frost forced all their strength against each other. It was just like every previous battle. The light and dark trying to force the other to give way- sheer power determining the outcome. They pressed against each other... and slowly... the weight and, strength, of the dark forced the blue eyed back.

However hard he pushed, he still found himself getting forced back- bending further and further over, until he was almost parallel to the ground. He had his face taunt and grimacing as he tried, vainly, to push back the shadow king. He glared at at the red mirror of his dark self, attempting hide his weakness- and the pain he felt- but it was obvious he was losing. A spark of victory flashed in the crimson eyes, and he gave a twisted smirk of satisfaction at seeing his pain and struggle of his opposite. He was so close to shattering... He could barely keep himself together... The light behind him barely shone- the snowy landscape dwindled to all but nothing. The massive swell of the dark storm almost completely taking over the space open to it. Leering over the whole space like a dark, writhing, sky.

Overland narrowed his eyes at him, the smirk remaining.  
"Aww, it that going to be it?" He tainted. "I was expecting more of a fight, even from you." He chuckled. "Such a shame. Not to worry, though, I'm sure your precious Guardians will prove much better sport." An almost hungry look appeared in his eye as he considered it- the battle, and the downfall of the Guardians. But Frost glared back defiantly, managing to force a slight, taunting smirk on top of his grimace.  
"You won't get the chance." He said through gritted teeth. The dark laughed, the red lightning behind him flashing across whole expanse of his mind.  
"Won't I? You really think I don't know about your little plan with North? Admirable, but stupid. Two steps. That's all it'll take- and I can head straight into the shadows. From then, all I have to do is grab my scythe- and do them off." He grinned, the madness in his eyes burning brighter than ever.

Frost's smile dropped, with his heart, as he heard this, and his eyes widened with fear.  
"No.. you won't be able to defeat the Guardians!" He forced out. The darkness chuckled.  
"Aww, Frosty." He drawled. "They couldn't even best me at half strength... I think we both know they don't even stand a chance." The white haired paled even more than usual, as he realised every word was true. He struggled harder against the dark, but it was no use. The darkness was too strong!... Perhaps it always had been.

His arms shook with the effort of keeping the locked weapons up, and the shadow master seemed to think he had all the time in the world.  
"You never could beat me." he muttered tauntingly." It leaned in closer. "Do you want to why?" It asked, not even waiting for an answer before leaning in to whisper in his ear. "Because you're weak." He whispered, the twisted grin spreading over his face again, as he pulled back slightly. "You can't even fight to save your own skin. You're pathetic. A waste of power. I could've ruled the world with darkness long before this. Made the world my own personal playground- but you had to hold me back." He scowled. The light underneath him growing weaker, and weaker. It could barely push against him now.  
"Not that it matters. You'll soon be gone- and so, will, they." He finished, not even bothering to put any pressure on the failing boy. He was done for.

And then... at that moment... Frost knew he was right. He couldn't fight... He couldn't win, because he just didn't care. He didn't care about himself- he couldn't fight for his own gain... and now the world was going to suffer for his weakness. The shadows were right... he was just too weak.

But there was one thing he didn't realise... He wasn't alone.

A huge, brilliant sheet of shimmering moonlight opened up beside them. Both the light and dark shot shocked heads to it. What was-?... And then, shining across the rippling curtain of moonlight, appeared the dancing scenes of times past. The moon had taken away his memories... now it was giving them back.

He had forgotten he was fighting this battle under the light of the eclipse... And the moon wasn't letting him give up so easily. He couldn't interfere directly, but... he could still do this for the winter child.

The scenes dancing before them. They saw themself... hair neither white nor red... but chestnut brown. Their sister was running after them, as he bounded off into the woods.

That same sister was now laughing at him, with the kids of the village. Watching as he flipped and hung from a low hanging branch.

A slightly bigger group of kids laughed as he goofed about with a pair of antlers, for their entertainment.

He saw his mother waving them off, as his sister pulled him away. He was telling her they'd be careful...

Then he saw his sister on the ice. It cracked and snapped around her. She told him she was scared, looking up at him with pleading, terrified eyes, and he told her she'd be alright. She just had to believe in him... And she looked and him... and she believed.

He told her they'd play a game, moving closer to a wooden crook. The same staff that the light grappled with now... He made her come closer... and closer... Finally pushing her onto the thicker ice. She smiled at him... and he smiled back... But he'd ended up on the thin ice.

It broke. The floor vanished... and the scenes faded from sight.

The white haired blinked, astonished... That... That was him? He'd really done all that? Keeping the kids happy. Reassuring his sister she was safe, when he was close to falling through himself. Kept her calm, and even made her laugh, as he thought of a way to rescue her... and then, to finally save her, he gave his own life in place of hers... And, he knew, he didn't regret it. Not for a moment. He'd loved his sister. He would have done anything for her... He'd happily die again, if he ever needed to... and not just her... But now was not the time to die those he cared about. Now was the time to fight for them.

Because, he got it now. He understood.

No, he couldn't fight for himself- but that was only because he cared so much for others... and that wasn't a weakness, that was a strength! Because, for them, he could defeat a thousand shadows if he had to... and more. He would just keep going, no matter what pain he endured, because he didn't care what happened to him... And that was where his true strength lay.

The red demon wiped its grossed out look of disgust from its face, and turned, stunned, back to the fight, as he felt a sudden pressure push against him. The once fading light was growing back in strength. The dim, weakened glimmer now shining and rising, with the determination to fight! It forced back the storm of darkness, and took back the space it had stolen. Though it still only held a single third of the battlefield, it was strong. Standing its own against the swamp of darkness.

Jack Frost found a new strength suffuse him. A strength that came from within, and it refused to be denied. He pushed back against the darkness that had for so long been greater than he was... And then it crept an inch away from him.

He didn't ease the pressure, and slowly... He began edging the locked weapons upwards... slowly... painstakingly... He pushed forwards so that he stood straight, level with Overland. The dark beast now baring its teeth- confused as to why the dual pressured weapons wouldn't move any closer to the growing light.

"You're right." Frost said, a playful smirk gracing his lips, as he strained up against the darkness. "I can't fight for myself." He told it. "... But its not myself I'm fighting for." He said, meeting the burning, crimson eyes with a fierce, sky blue light. "And that's what makes me strong. You can't ever win against me, because I won't- ever- stop. You can do whatever you like to me, and I will just keep fighting." The light now equalled the darkness in the battlefield- leering high against it- filling the space with it brilliant, luminous glow. Towering against it like a dawn approaching sky. But it wasn't enough to equal it. To save the Guardians he had to win- so that was what he'd do.

Frost thought. The darkness had been going about this fight all wrong. It had tried to wipe him out- destroy him- and that was a big mistake. Neither one of them would go down easily the fight would be near impossible and last forever if that was what would decide it. But there was another way. To take the opponent's side of the field.

To do that all he had to do was enter it, and it would all be over... but Overland wouldn't let him get there easily.

He backed off, breaking the stalemate of their crossed weapons, and went to land on the semi existent floor.  
"So, come on, then!" He taunted. Shouting up to the red eyed demon. He always had been the best at being annoying. "Give me your best shot!" He challenged. The glow in the demons eyes cracked like lightning, as he roared... and then charged. Careening towards the light boy with a tidal wave of dark force building in his scythe.

Frost broadened his stance, and readied his staff to attack... Then dodged, completely avoiding the attack, and rushed, straight past Overland, towards the overhead, distant clouds of darkness, and the point where it met the ground.

He sprinted faster, and faster. Willing his legs to go as fast as he dared. He heard the demon shout out behind him  
"No! STOP!" It ordered, and it shooting after him. The darkness loomed closer. The light followed its champion, as he got closer... and closer... But so too the charging red demon got closer... His heart (if he had one in this form) was beating like mad. He didn't dare stop, and he didn't dare look back...His feet blurring as he ran even faster... The storm clouds were right there in front of him... Two steps away...

A cry of rage and fury from the demon behind him stabbed into his ears... He reached out his hand... It touched the shadows... And then everything went white.


	23. Chapter 23

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Twenty Two- Belonging

 **Authors note: hey guys so several reasons for this ending how it does- I felt like I needed to make it up to Jack after being so cruel, the idea of him ugh ring himself was too awesome to ignore and I wanted this to be a kind of there's always a light at the end of the tunnel kind of stor**

 **Apologies to those of you who loved mr evil overland but... He may not be gone forever. This is the last chapter but there will be a nice epilogue tommorow I will tell you more about my future plans then^^**

 **Okay so please review this chapter this story is almost over now so I hope you've been enjoying it but I'll save the goodbyes til later for now enjoy this chapter and I will be back tommorow with the last part of this story^^**

He came back to himself. The world returning to his eyes. He just stood there for a moment. He was...

He took a dazed step back. He was free... He was.. himself! His chest grew tight, as he gasped in a breath, eyes shining. He almost felt like a different person, but it was different to that- it was so much better. He was exactly the person he was supposed to be. The world suddenly had so much more vigour- more colour... Had it always been like this?

He laughed quietly as he stepped back, unable to stop the broad smile spreading across his face- and why would he want to.. This was who he was. He was himself. Everything felt so right- the whole world had shifted into place.  
"It's gone." He whispered, barely daring to accept the truth that every instinct told him was true. He laughed again, unable to believe it. There was no way- but he was! He couldn't deny it! Believe it, something told him. You are free.

A great swell of joy rose through every part of him. He was free! He was free! He didn't care how many times he'd said it- he'd shout it until he grew tired of it (and that didn't seem to be any time in the next four hundred million years)! Was it even possible to be so overjoyed?! Was his heart really so huge?! How could it even fit in his chest? He felt sure it was as big as the moon! The vast ocean of emotion tumbling and bubbling within it swelling it enormously, as he let the emotions run riot- he would never have to cage them again! He could feel!

Suddenly, he felt as though he'd been he was buzzing with energy. Such joy! Such happiness! He just couldn't keep still! He bounced on his feet- springing lightly, as he fought to hold some shred of dignity in his euphoria. Oh, forget dignity! Since when did he ever have that anyway! He laughed as loud and as hard as his heart wished. The sound of pure joy, as he danced about.

He turned to the Guardians- they blurred slightly, though the sparkle in his eyes.  
"I did it!" He couldn't have sounded more amazed or overjoyed at those words. He was good! Not that that meant he was going to be a little angel from now on- oh no. He was going to be downright evil with his pranks! He just wasn't going to be taking over the world anytime soon.

Tooth looked like she was catching his electric buzz of happiness. She giggled, and looked ready to zip towards him and give him a huge hug, which he would've been all too happy to accept- but not yet. He just remembered! He had something he had to do first! Something he promised! Something he just had to do- he wanted to do... wanted to do... He wanted to do it... and he could! He could do whatever he wanted! Anything! He wasn't bound by the darkness, anymore! He could- he could- wait, no he couldn't. Well he'd just have to go get it then!

He jumped back, climbing onto the globe control board- pushing a few random buttons and levers as he did. He laughed again- yep, annoying was definately in his nature! He didn't even hear North yelling at him for messing up the globe- although he could imagine his face was the perfect picture- because he'd jumped straight off.

He thought he heard Bunny shouting after him in alarm, but he was more than fine! He was the most happiest he'd been in his entire life! He wasn't in any pain whatsoever! Breakdowns were no more! No more living in fear! No more pain- no more pacifying! The darkness was gone! He had the freedom to do anything- and be anything. The world was a much bigger, brighter place now- and he knew just what he was going to do first.

The air whistled past him as he free fell deeper into the workshop, the thrill of the fall adding to his, already impossible tall, tower of joy. A long, loud whoop of delight following him, as he landed on top of one of the random, flying things in the main worky bit. A giant, aerial turtle? But, he didn't really notice that. It plummeted the moment he hit it, but he notice that either! By the time it dipped, he'd already leapt onto a different one.

This one lurched as he hit it, but didn't take a nosedive- wait! This thing was one of those kite like da vinci thingies! A kite (or near enough). He loved these things- perfect! He used to (and still will) love riding these when he got bored! (He'd often ride a lost kite he often had to take it from some poor kid, thanks to the darkness), but he sure knew how to work one of these things! Even windless!

He swung his weight back, and let it fly forwards- sweeping right the way across the workshop. How had his voice not tired of yelling for joy yet? He didn't know, but still hadn't stopped crowing at the top of his voice since he fell! His happiness resonating throughout the whole pole- infecting it with endless joy!

Oh, this was taking too long! He jumped. Swinging off the bottom of a jellyfish. Leapfrogging over a support beam. Wall bouncing onto a zeppelin, and then onto the the floor- just next to the room he was headed for. He'd been doing parkour since before it was even invented- not his best improv, but man in the moon it felt good! Apparently he was a hooligan who revelled in doing what he shouldn't. Nice.

He didn't halt his flight to the room, and flung the door open excitably. It didn't even have time to close before he was zipping out of it again- this time with staff in hand. A regular staff- it would never again be capped with that blood red blade.

He called the wind, and it swept him up in a great joyous gale! Rocketing him straight back up to the Guardians with, yet another, joyful whoop. He lapped round the globe- once, twice, three times? He didn't care- he was lost in the ventures and elation of flight. Then he landed literally at the top of the world, as he hung off the top of the globe. On top of the world... exactly how he felt right now.

Leaning off it, as he looked down at the staring Guardians- his eyes latched onto Bunny. A sudden whim, and he swung his staff. The rabbit yelped and fell, hard, onto the sudden slippery ice beneath him. Jack laughed. See that! He pranked him! Just for the joy of it! Just because he wanted to- just because he could! He didn't have to do it- but he did! He swung himself around the globe again- wait! He almost forgot about his little, unexpected trip he half planned (he'd decided he was going to do it- that counted as planning, right?).

He grinned, and swooped right down towards the Guardians, as though about to land- but far from it. He shot up again- this time with all four Guardians wobbling about the wind in tow. Well, Tooth and Sandy were pretty well balanced actually, but North and Bunny were turning somersaults as readily as their pilot (who'd lost count already of his flips).

He dived out the nearest hatch, out into the open, arctic tundra, flipping over to fly backwards and see cries of fear, alarm, joy and sand as his kidnapped friends followed... His... His kidnapped...

And then the wind suddenly shook like a volcanic explosion was about to take place. It blasted him straight up into the air, with an elated shout, before he let gravity take over and pull him back. Friends! He could have friends! He... He did have friends! He laughed, as he fell past the Guardians still floating on their little gusts of wind, and he tightened his grip on his staff with anticipation, devil smirk broadening.

He shot back up between them, scattering them everywhere, before he dragged them along with him. Wait- he couldn't wait long enough for Everest! But who said he had to do Everest? He could do whatever he wanted! Forget Everest- they were going to random North Pole mountain number 7393! He let them all drop towards the rocky slope. Stopping the wind completely so they free fell downwards.

He heard Bunny yelling  
"Jaaack!" To which he only cheered, as they hurtled towards what seemed like their deaths- but of course he wouldn't let that happen. That would be cruel- and he wasn't that anymore!... Well, not excessively.

He created five, giant frisbees of ice below each of them as they landed, sending them all careening down the slopes of rock and snow. The moment he touched his, he slalomed right round to crash into Bunny's. His reaction was brilliant- he stood by what he said- he was the best to prank. Ever! He laughed at his wail of shock, then swerving away to survey the other sledders so that he was speeding backwards down the rocky slope. The others thought he didn't see the ridge coming. He did- he just liked making them panic. As he launched up into the air, he expertly rolled over and over, managing at least thirteen three sixties (one of his lesser impressive jumps), and landed it upright like a pro. Then, he scanned his crowd.

Sandy had hands thrown in the air- Tooth was leaning into the wind, her wings quivering with joy- Bunny couldn't stop spinning from when he'd crashed into him earlier- and North was zigzagging everywhere, erratically, with little or no control. The Christmas Guardian laughed at Bunny- then yelled in alarm, as he jolted over a pebble. Looks like it was his turn to take North on a sleigh ride, huh!... North... Sleigh ride... He got an awesome idea.

He turned the snow to ice beneath them, and pulled them all into one long, big ice chute... Here it comes! He whipped up his staff, sending the chute rearing like a wave, curling back onto itself- and putting on a slight spin- as they completed the loop the loop, landing on the second ramp he formed upon their take off.

He was pretty sure there was resounding laughter from all the Guardians now... He eased his speed slightly to let the others draw level with him. From where he was positioned he had a perfect view of all of them... And then... despite his fast pumping heart, his overwhelming happiness and his quick, deep breathes... He felt a strange calm envelope him.

He watched the Guardians- their laughing, smiling faces as they flew down the mountain together... and he felt something he'd never felt before. He almost didn't recognise it. He'd always dreamed about this feeling, but he'd never really understood what it meant- and definately not what it'd feel like... but somehow... He felt, in his heart... that this was it. Three hundred years of fear, stress, worry... that tension serves as a reminder of the endurance of pain (there was an incredible amount of that)- all the bad stuff the darkness left behind... He felt it all roll off his shoulders, as he let the sensation spread through his being.

Belonging.

Here, with the Guardians... with his friends... Smiling and happy and having the time of their lives... This was where he was meant to be.

Happiness had always bEen such a rare treat for him. He'd never even settled in his own skin, and yet, now... He knew who he was and where he was meant to be... And thanks to the shadows, he wouldn't ever take any of that for granted. He knew how... magical... it felt to be a part of a... a family... How much it made his heart sing... And now that he had it... he wasn't ever going to let it go, ever, again. He was going to keep on making the Guardians laugh and smile, because that's what families did... and that was the person he was.

The right person. The good person.

He was, at long last... Jack Frost.


	24. Chapter 24

I am Dark and I am Light  
RotG fanfic  
Chapter Epilogue- The Great Title

 **Authors note: hey guys^^ here we are at the final part of this story thank you soooo much for being so amazing and reading and or favouriting following and reviewing (an especially big massive thank you to you reviewers you make it all so worth it and you always make me smile okay not at the end yet though we've still got this little epilogue so I'll see you at the end for the official goodbye- please do read it as I have a special surprise for you all!**

He strode through the trees, admiring the simple beauty of winter... Just enjoying the moment. He still couldn't believe he was free... It had been what?... A half a year now?... And he still couldn't accept the fact he was never again to feel the oppression of darkness... It was such an amazing feeling- that much would never change- and that was why he spent the occasional time just doing nothing.

He could do that now. He could settle. He wouldn't be torn and forced to move- he could stay as long as he wanted. A concept just as incredible and foreign as doing what he wanted... He just... (he sighed)... he loved the feeling... Peace... And it felt... Right.

The smile that had almost become a permanent part of him now felt like his smile; the wooden staff he wielded, that had saved his sister's life... it was his winter staff. The eyes through which he saw the wonders of the world were his eyes. He could laugh and know that that laugh- that light sound of innocence- was his... and the wind that blew through his hair was his hair and his friend the wind... Him. Himself. Whole.

In some ways his life hadn't changed. It was still an endless tirade of pranks snowball fights and sleigh rides... But the big difference now was that it was out of choice.. And, of course, there was the Guardians. He would often just visit one of them, and help out occasionally- when he wasn't driving them up the wall with all the trouble he'd caused.

At first, he almost hadn't know what to do with himself, without the need to fight the darkness every second taking up his life, but then... He decided he'd do what he'd always done- in some way or another. He'd have fun. But this time he'd do as the Guardians would do. He'd play with the kids. Keep them smiling and happy- as he did for them... and in playing with the children, he found himself a new goal. Belief.

He worked to get the kids to see him. A near impossible task. No one had heard of "Jack Frost." It was a name that only existed through coincidence- when someone named Jack had a parent surnamed Frost. But he didn't give up hope- that was one thing Bunnymund had taught him- and after all the other impossible, down right unbeatable tasks that had been thrust upon him, and somehow overcome... He didn't give up easily. He just carried on trying, with hope that he'd get there eventually. He would be seen.

There was a huge difference between the Guardians belief in him and the children's belief in the Guardians. He often wondered what it felt like... but he wasn't going to find out anytime soon. He just had to keep at it. Someone, some century, might see him one day, but until then, he could have many great times with the kids. It was funny, really. He did that a lot before he became himself. He used to play all the time- if he felt like it. Even under the thrall of darkness, it seemed his whole life seemed to centre around-...

He froze, as still as though he'd been captured in a painting...

Centre.

One of few missing puzzle pieces in his life snapped into place... and with it came an even greater sense of knowing... and feeling that he understood not only what but who he was...

Fun... Everything in his life has seemed to revolve around it. If it didn't seem enjoyable, then the just wouldn't do it. Even the darkness' goal had been fun oriented- he'd wanted to make the world his own personal playground. His centre... He had a centre! And he'd had it all along... He felt as though he'd somehow become more rooted to his body. In touch with his whole being.

A snowball hurtled towards him. He dodged it on instinct.

What the? Who was-? Was it Bunny? Snowballs didn't exactly seem his style... but then...? He turned round, confused... and then his eyes landed on the small, brown haired boy, staring at him in open wonder.

He froze in time. But... that snowball had been aimed at him... and there was no one else here- the forest was empty except for those two- and his eyes... they were looking... straight at him. Not near him, or past him... At him. His eyes were locked and focussed on the disbelieving, immortal teen.  
"...Y... you can... you can see me?" He whispered, so quiet it wasn't really a question- more an incredulous acknowledgement. The young boy didn't even hear it.

His slack jawed, wonder eyed expression brightened as he grinned, excitably.  
"Wow! How did you do that?! I mean, you didn't even know I was here, and you still just-!" He enthused. Jack grinned.  
"I know! Its brilliant in snowball fights- but, you know, you almost got me yesterday!" He said, with somehow more enthusiasm than Jamie.  
"You were there!" He questioned, amazed.  
"Yeah! I was the one who got you first!" He told him, bouncing about. "I thought that was Claude!" He laughed. Jack laughed back.

"But how did you know I was here?" He asked, the energy calming slightly.  
"I got a note. It said: 'In the woods there is an immortal boy who's impossible to hit with a snowball. He goes by the name Jack Frost.' -And I just had to check it out!" He informed, still grinning. A note? Jack thought. Who would-?  
"Who wrote it?" He asked. Jamie shrugged.  
"It said B, so it could be my mum. Her name's Beatrice, you know." He speculated.

No, he knew who B was... He'd really... done that for him...? He resolved not to prank the Bunny quite so much from now on (maybe if he was lucky it would last more than a week).

"I know." He answered, a smirk spreading across his face. "I've seen the last fifteen generation of Bennetts." Jamie's eyes went round again.  
"So, are you really like immortal?" He gaped.  
"Yup." He confirmed.  
"And can you do other stuff too?! I mean-..." He queried. Jack's grin broadened. He better bet his sled he did- and he was going to show him everything... And then maybe take him flying- or maybe on a massive sleigh ride! He didn't know, but it didn't matter. He could do whatever he wanted. One thing was for certain, though. Him and the kid were going to have a blast!

They were going to have so much fun. He was rather good at it after all.

The moon focussed its energy down on Earth. There was a boy down there. One that had endured much, and fought hard, to be able to do good thing. He'd done more than the man in the moon dared hoped possible for the once split spirit. He'd exceeded everyone's expectations- including his own.

He deeply regretted every pain the boy felt, as a result of his failure to act quickly that day... And that he'd left him to endure it all alone. But he couldn't interfere, or give aid to the child. Not directly. There were powers even greater than him- and they were most strict when it came to this.

He'd had a long, hard struggle for most his life, but that made him all the greater. The heavier the beating on the anvil, the greater the sword that forms. Indeed it was proven true, in winter spirit. But now he was whole... and he had grown. He knew who he was, had found himself his centre... and now he had a believer. He was ready.

How long had the moon itself dreamed of this day? Where the young child- tested, broken, healed and whole- was finally going to know his place in the world... and take it, at long last.

He rested his light on a small plate in the North Pole, where he knew workers were scrambling to get their master. Under the soft touch of the light, the plate split and a crystal rose.

He'd saved the Guardians, despite the his own pain, and the urges to destroy them, and such a heroic act couldn't go unnoticed.

And now, he was finally ready... for that great title "Guardian".

The End?

 **Authors note: okay now this is the goodbye ^w^ Aww Im getting emotional because I looked back on all the reviews you all sent me and honestly you have all been so brilliant and incredible you really made me keep going and you know what? you've actually gone and done it. Yes that is a question mark beside 'the end' And that's because- SEQUEL! ^^ yes! I know I know to those of you've who've seen a few other stories you'll be say about how I keep doing this but I blame you guys for carrying on inspiring and motivating me to do more^^ so this is not the end- as for what that means if Overland will return if the darkness will come back to haunt Jack well you'll have to wait^^ it won't be a long sequel only a shortish one but hopefully I will see you all there soon in Dark and Light: Blood Moon**


	25. The blood moon has arisen

The blood moon has arisen

It's official! Dark and Light: Blood Moon is now up and going!

There's a real life blood moon tonight! So I thought it was perfect timing!

Sorry it took so long but here it is!

I will be updating every other day rather than daily as it's not completely finished yet, but hopefully it's not too bad.

So yeah- see you at the blood moon! ^^


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